14/09/2018
An excerpt from last night’s masterclass.
COUNTING THE COST!
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As a high value thought leader (speaker, consultant, coach, etc), your sexual pursuits can destroy you.
It’s not always destruction on a dramatic scale. It doesn’t have to be the scandal sort.
It’s in the little whispers that follow your escapades. Your ‘partners’ are confiding in other people what transpired, or at least their high impact versions.
Now you’re wondering why you’re not being called for events or appearances at TV and Radio houses.
You’re experiencing a strange financial/economic dryness and you’re wondering whether it’s ‘everywhere’.
It’s not everywhere oh. It’s not you.
A gatekeeper somewhere has heard your gist, added salt, pepper and maggi and shared with other gatekeepers in the industry.
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ACT 1
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NKECHI: “Our HOD gave me a list of 5 trainers to consider for our comIng event. What do you think about Kunle?”
ABIKE: “Which Kunle? Wait. Is he tall, not too dark, with big head?”
NKECHI: “Wow! How did you know?”
ABIKE: “Hmmm... I don’t want to say anything sha oh. But he used to have a thing with Enitan. Do you know all that time, he was secretly planning his wedding to someone else? It was so bad”
NKECHI: “I don’t believe you. This guy is a great speaker and one of the best life coaches I know”
ABIKE: “My dear, I don’t have power to argue. All the girls in my compound know that guy. Let me show you screenshots from a chat he had with my flat mate.”
NKECHI: “Oh my God!”
ABIKE: “Ah, keep scrolling oh. There’s more. You know these days, it’s important to keep evidence just in case.”
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END OF ACT 1
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I was going to create ACT 2, where a woman is this time on the receiving end but I think you already get the message by now.
Our generation of thought leaders are mostly young and very virile (it’s a compliment. Look up the word).
However, this presents a bigger problem of taming these misleading hormones, while balancing purpose.
Figure this out while remembering that a stainless reputation is your biggest asset.
Falling in love with a fellow thought leader is fairly easy. We share common interests and maybe common values.
But please look hard into your soul. Search your heart. If you know that you will not marry this person, prepare an extra seat in your conducive friend zone. You people can still help each other in life without getting entangled in THAT way.
Once you cross the line and start knacking, you’ve opened another door for exposure. You have no control over what this person will do with what they now know about you.
FEMALES LISTEN!
Many female thought leaders are still dealing with past heartbreak, low self esteem and daddy issues.
Predators (even in the industry) are trained to spot a wounded animal. They know that you’re only smart, not wise. They know the buttons to push.
Once a predator has had you, he tells other predators. They will come to you with an expectation of the same dish their compatriot was (reportedly) served.
Nobody will take you seriously anymore, ESPECIALLY your fellow females.
You might be wondering whether you’re cursed. No, look deeper and you’ll see the connection.
You opened a door. Now your gist is everywhere and you’re considering dropping this career for one where less people will know you.
So when you see me shouting DISCIPLINE like a mad man, don’t see me as a grumpy old man who doesn’t want you to enjoy life.
I’m just 32, but by God’s grace, I know things. It doesn’t matter how, only that I do.
I’m not saving your life either.
No, I’m too busy with mine.
I’m begging you to take your destiny into your own hands and save yourself.
In 2018 and beyond, honour is becoming a scarce commodity.
Social media technologies have messed with people’s brains and no one knows how to shut up anymore.
The media vampires also don’t like it that you’re young, relevant, bagging awards and making clean money. They want to see you bleed.
It’s becoming more and more expensive to be an idiot.
You were born for such a time as this, but you must learn the rules of the road.
Count the cost of impact.
Beware the perils of the path.
At any cost, PROTECT THE GIFT!
- J.O.