Guidance/counseling forum

Which area do you need counseling? Indicate

*DO YOU KNOW THE VIRUSES THAT KILL MARRIAGES?*

· *Laziness*
Kills marriage
· *Suspicion*
Kills marriage
· *Lack of trust*
Kills marriage
· *Lack of mutual respect*
Kills marriage
· *Unforgiveness*
Kills marriage
-(Forgiveness is not optional but mandatory)
· *Arguments*
Kill marriage
· *Keeping secrets from your spouse*
Kills marriage
· *Every form of infidelity*
Kills marriage
-(financial, emotional, psychological, material, etc)
· *Poor communication*
Kills marriage
*Lies*
Easily kill marriage,
-(be sincere to your spouse in every aspect)
· *Relating more with your parents than your spouse*
Kills marriage
· *Nagging*
Kills marriage
· *Too much talk and careless talk*
Kills marriage
· *Spending less or little time with your spouse*
Kills marriage
· *Being too independent minded*
Kills marriage
· *Love for party, money and spending/partying*
Kills marriage
· *Exposing the inadequacies of your spouse to your parents or siblings or friends*
Kills marriage
· *Not being steadfast/fervent in the spirit*
Kills not only marriage but your life
· *Spurning :( to reject with disdain or contempt ) correction and reprimand*
Kills marriage
· *Always wearing a sad face and being moody*
Kills marriage
· *FEMINISM ADVOCACY*
Kills marriage
· *Uncontrolled or hot temperament*
Kills marriage
· *Not understanding your role and position in marriage as instituted by God*
Kills marriage
· *Not being sensitive to the spiritual, emotional and physical needs of your spouse*
Kills marriage
· *When anything threatens the position/security of a wife, her reaction(s) will be detrimental to her marriage.*
· *Lack of knowledge of the Word of God*
Kills marriage

*Please, save a marriage today by sharing this.*

May God bring HEALING to every TROUBLED Home + Family
*Amen & Amen*.....

🌈 _*An inspirational story about wife and Husband*_🌈👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻

He grinned when he saw his daughter, and her husband as he walked into the house.
The old man, was on one of his rare visits to his daughter and son- in-law.

He met them in the Diwali vacation.
This was needed to comfort the old man from loneliness after his wife’s demise seven months ago.

After dinner that evening, he whispered to his son-in-law that if they didn’t mind, he would love to have a quick word with the couple after the children had gone to bed.

By 9pm, the couple was back in the living room to hear what the old man had to say.

He started by asking them a simple question.
“What is the most important thing in your life beti?
She replied, “Daddy, it is the kids !!! They mean everything to me”..

He then turned and asked his son-in-law the same question, he also (beaming with pride) said :
"it is the kids of course; they are the reason why I work so hard to ensure they have a better life”

"Well said my children. I don’t mean to intrude on how to run your family life, but I believe there is a fundamental error you will need to correct. He said “ I have observed how much you both love your kids and dedicate all your time for them......

I have observed that almost all your conversation borders mostly on the kids." The couple nodded in admission to the assertion.

He continued, "I am a poultry farmer, and the biggest egg supplier in my district. I make my money by the quantity of eggs sold. That said, my priority has always been providing optimal care for the chicken. Because, I know that when the chicken are healthy and productive, the eggs will automatically be bountiful.
*If I start to ignore the chicken, the eggs will also suffer*."

He pointed to his son-in-law and said, “as a husband, the most important person in your life should be your wife and vice versa.
It cannot be the kids. They are just products of the marriage.

*If you learn to take care of each other very well, your kids will grow up healthy, happy and well-adjusted, but if you ignore each other, brace yourself up for dysfunctional kids in the future*.

The two of you are the foundation of this family. If you suffer any crack, the whole house will go down. So please make time for yourself and treat each other as *PRIORITY* and the kids will be just fine.

This has been the secret of the fruitful union between your Mother and Myself for over 50 years till death took her from me.

The old man's eyes welled up with tears at this stage.
He thanked the couple for their time and excused himself to his room.

If care is not taken, this magical connection gets weakened, thereby opening up a marriage to all sorts of strange elements and even divorce.

Let kids observe that your spouse means the world to you and if you are to choose between them and your spouse, it will always be your spouse.

Give the kids the love and attention they deserve but not at the cost of neglecting each other.

It is your marriage that will sustain your kids, not vice versa. The kids are just the bonus.

*Dr. Nisreen Merchant*
_Psychotherapist_

*_Talking Helps... Talking Heals_*

What area of your life do you need counseling? Indicate.

_*DID YOU KNOW THE VIRUSES THAT KILL MARRIAGES?*_

· *Laziness* kills marriage
· *Suspicion* kills marriage
· *Lack of trust* kills marriage
· *Lack of mutual respect* kills marriage
· *Unforgiveness* kills marriage _(Forgiveness is not optional but mandatory)_
· *Arguments* kill marriage
· *Keeping secrets from your spouse* kills marriage
· *Every form of infidelity* kills marriage _(financial, emotional, psychological, material, etc)_
· *Poor communication* kills marriage
*Lies* easily kill marriage, _(be sincere to your spouse in every aspect)._
· *Relating more with your parents than your spouse* kills marriage
· *Nagging* kills marriage
· *Too much talk and careless talk* kills marriage
· *Spending less or little time with your spouse* kills marriage
· *Being too independent minded* kills marriage
· *Love for party, money and spending/partying* kills marriage
· *Exposing the inadequacies of your spouse to your parents or siblings or friends* kills marriage
· *Not being steadfast/fervent in the spirit* kills not only marriage but your life
· *Spurning correction and reprimand* kills marriage.
· *Always wearing a sad face and being moody* kills marriage.
· *FEMINISM ADVOCACY* kills marriage.
· *Uncontrolled or hot temperament* kills marriage.
· *Not understanding your role and position in marriage as instituted by God* kills marriage.
· *Not being sensitive to the spiritual, emotional and physical needs of your spouse* kills marriage
· *When anything threatens the position/security of a wife, her reaction(s) will be detrimental to her marriage.*
· *Lack of knowledge of the Word of God* kills marriage.

_*Please, save a marriage today by sharing this.*_

_May God bring healing to every troubled home and family._
*Amen.*

_Police Questioning a Robber:_

*Police:* How did you come to know that there was no one in the house?

*Robber:* The update of the entire family with 15 photos was available on facebook. *_"Enjoying Holidays away from home for one week_".*

Think about this seriously.

*_Be careful what you put on facebook._*

Discuss this with your children & wards.

*_Stop sharing personal information on the social media!!!_*

📛 Don't advertise your happiness on social media.

📛 Don't advertise your happy marriage On social media.

📛 Don't advertise your holidays on social media.

📛 Don't advertise your kids
achievements on social media.

📛 Don't advertise your pregnancy on social media.

📛 Don't advertise your expensive buys on social media. (Car, house etc).

‼ Don't advertise flying from airport (A) to airport (B).

‼ No one is going to be happy for you.

‼ All the _"nice"_ comments you get are just fake.

‼ You just attracting the evil eye on you, & your family.

‼ You are just attracting jealous people into your life.

‼ You don't know who's saving your pictures, & checking your updates

‼ You really need to stop this, as it is going to ruin your life, family, marriage.

‼ Social media is the devil's eyes, ears & mouth.
Don't fall into the devil's trap.

May God help us, & save us from social disaster !!!

*_Please pass it on to everyone in your contact list._* 👍✌

*THE DIFFERENT STAGES OF MARRIAGE...!*

1. THE AMAZEMENT STAGE: This is the "wow" stage. Lots of new things to discover with your spouse. The newness, the freshness is so amazing. Sleeping on the same bed, wearing the same attire, cooking for him, doing house chores with her, bathing together. Wearing your dazzling wedding ring everywhere, turning people's head at the newest couple around. Loads and lots of fun. Sexual exploration and excitement. Being in control of your kitchen, feeding him and lots more. It's the honeymoon stage and it's so so beautiful.

2. THE IRRITATION STAGE: This is when you begin to notice weaknesses you have overlooked or blissfully wish they go away but didn't. The repetition of such weaknesses begins to work on your nerves and you are getting irritated: he snores a lot, she is slow in the kitchen, she belches loudly, he screams unnecessarily, she won't bathe before coming to bed or shave, he spends many hours watching football and ignores you when you talk. "What's just wrong with this guy?" You think aloud, well it's part of marriage.

3. THE ANGER STAGE: This is when the repetition of such weaknesses gets on your nerves and you display your anger. The introverted partners stuffs it in and either keep malice, avoid you or stubbornly continue with the irritating habit. It's the stage you begin to wonder: "have I really married the wrong guy?" "Have I married the wrong woman?" No, you did not, you are simply going through a phase together.

4. THE RESOLUTION STAGE: When you both begin to face the reality of marriage and acknowledge your partner's weaknesses. You eventually realize anger and malice does not solve any problem and begins to find ways to deal with your differences, both of you begin to compromise here and there and adjust to each other.

5. THE ACCEPTANCE STAGE: When it dawned on you that some things are just part of your partner and may never change. You resigned from anger, abuse and quarrel and choose to accept them, lovingly adjust to them and enjoy them regardless of their weaknesses.

6. THE RESTFUL STAGE:This is the stage you permanently accept them with all their strengths, weaknesses, short comings and flaws and love them unconditionally regardless of what they do. This is real love -agape, divine and true. You reconnect emotionally, spiritually and physically at a deeper level and enjoy honey moon again while building a lasting marriage regardless of the challenges you face.

There is no perfect marriage. Every marriage goes through this stages. How you handle it will determine if you will come out bitter or better.
You don't have to abuse your spouse or keep malice if God is at the centre of your home and you obey the word of God daily.
Nevertheless, do not be disappointed if you go through the unpleasant stages in marriage. It is a phase and will surely end.

Handle your marriage with wisdom and keep loving regardless of the challenges you face. That is what will make your marriage a heaven on earth experience. Thanks for reading. God bless you. Cheers!

*LESSONS ON MARRIAGE*

1. *EVERYONE YOU MARRY HAS A WEAKNESS*

Only God has no weakness. Every rose flower has its own thorn. If you focus too much on your spouse’s weakness, you can’t get the best out of his/her strength.

2. *EVERYONE YOU MARRY HAS A DARK HISTORY*

No one is an angel, therefore, avoid digging one’s past. What matters is the present life of your partner. Old things are passed away. Try to forgive and forget. The past can’t be changed. So focus on the present and the future!

3. *EVERY MARRIAGE HAS IT’S OWN CHALLENGES*

Marriage is not bed of roses. Every shining marriage has gone through its own test of hot and excruciating fire. True love is proved in time of challenge. Fight for your marriage! Make up your mind to stay with your spouse in time of needs. Remember this is the vow you made on your wedding day!

4. *EVERY MARRIAGE HAS DIFFERENT LEVELS OF SUCCESS*

Don’t compare your marriage with anyone! We can never be equal, some will be far in front and others far behind. To avoid marriage stresses, be patient, work hard and with time, your marriage dreams shall come true.

5. *TO MARRY IS TO DECLARE A WAR*

When you marry, you must declare a war against enemies of marriage. Some of the enemies of marriage are: Ignorance, Rumours, Prayerlessness, Unforgiveness, Adultery, Third Party Influence, Stinginess, Stubbornness, Lack Of Love, Rudeness, Wife battery, Laziness, winning, nagging, PRIDE, Divorce etc. Be ready to fight to maintain your marriage zone.

6. *THERE IS NO PERFECT MARRIAGE*

There is no ready made marriage anywhere. Marriage is hard work, volunteer yourself and perfect it daily. Marriage is like a MOTOR CAR with a gear oil, gear box, etc If these parts are not properly maintained, the car will break down somewhere along the road and expose the occupant to unhealthy circumstances. – Many of us are careless about our marriage… Are you? If you are, please pay attention to your marriage.

7. *GOD CANNOT GIVE YOU THE COMPLETE PERSON YOU DESIRE*

God gives you, her or him in form of raw materials in order for you to mold what you desire. You may desire a woman who can pray for 1 hour but your wife can only pray for 30 minutes. With your love, prayer and encouragement, she can improve.

8. *TO MARRY IS TO TAKE A RISK*

You cannot predict what will happen after marriage, as situation may change, so, leave a room for adjustment. Pregnancy may not come in the next 4 years. You may get married to her because she's slim but she becomes a little fat after a child. He may lose his beautiful job for years that you have to take the financial responsibility of the family until he gets a new job. But with God by your side, you will smile at long last.

9. *MARRIAGE IS NOT A CONTRACT, IT IS PERMANENT*

Marriage needs total commitment, love is the glue that makes a couple stick together. Divorce starts in the mind. Never think of divorce! Never threaten your spouse with divorce. Choose to remain married! God hates divorce, though it’s permitted only in extreme cases.

10. *EVERY MARRIAGE HAS A PRICE TO PAY*

Marriage is like a bank account. It is the money you deposit into your bank account that you can withdrawn. If you don’t deposit love, peace and care into your marriage, you are not a candidate of a blissful home. There is no free love in marriage, You cannot love without giving and sacrificing.

May God grant us the grace and wisdom to succeed in it. Amen send it to all married and single people on your contact.

All married people should read and imbibe these 10 secrets. Those about to marry should understand and accept them. Especially note Nos. 3, 6 & 7.

Post to all married couple.

*TEN (10) GOLDEN SECRETS OF MARRIAGE:*
*TO THOSE WHO ARE MARRIED AND/OR ARE PREPARING TO GET MARRIED SOON*

1. *EVERYONE YOU MARRY HAS A WEAKNESS*

Only God has no weakness. Every rose flower has its own thorn. If you focus too much on your spouse's weakness, you can't get the best out of his/her strength.

2. *EVERYONE YOU MARRY HAS A DARK HISTORY*

No one is an Angel, therefore, avoid digging one's past. What matters is the present life of your partner. Old things are passed away. Try to forgive and forget. The past can't be changed. So Focus on the present and the future!

3. *EVERY MARRIAGE HAS IT'S OWN CHALLENGES*

Marriage is not bed of roses. Every shinning marriage has gone through its own test of hot and excruciating fire. True love is proved in time of challenge. Fight for your marriage! Make up your mind to stay with your spouse in time of needs. Remember this is the vow you made on your wedding day!

4. *EVERY MARRIAGE HAS DIFFERENT LEVELS OF SUCCESS*

Don't compare your marriage with anyone! We can never be equal, some will be far in front and others far behind. To avoid marriage stresses, be patient, work hard and with time, your marriage dreams shall come true.

5. *TO MARRY IS TO DECLARE A WAR*

When you marry, you must declare a war against enemies of marriage. Some of the enemies of marriage are: Ignorance, Prayerlessness, Unforgiveness, Adultery, Third Party Influence, Stinginess, Stubbornness, Lack Of Love, Rudeness, Wife battery, Laziness, Divorce etc. Be ready to fight to maintain your marriage zone.

6. *THERE IS NO PERFECT MARRIAGE*

There is no ready made marriage anywhere. Marriage is hard work, volunteer yourself and perfect it daily. Marriage is like a CAR with Gear oil, gear box, back hassles and If these parts are not properly maintained, the car will brake down somewhere along the road and expose the occupant to unhealthy circumstances. - Many of us are careless about our marriage... Are you? If you are, pls pay attention to your marriage.

7. *GOD CANNOT GIVE YOU THE COMPLETE PERSON YOU DESIRE*

He (God) gives you, him or her in the form of raw materials in order for you to mould what you desire. You may desire a woman who can pray for 1 hours but your wife can only pray for 30 minutes. With your love, prayer and encouragement, she can improve.

8. *TO MARRY IS TO TAKE A RISK*

You cannot predict what will happen after marriage, as situation may change, so, leave a room for adjustment. Pregnancy may not come in the next 4 years. You may get marry to her because she's slim but she becomes 100% fatter after a child. He may lose his beautiful job for years that you have to take the financial responsibility of the family until he gets a new job. But with God by your side, you will smile at last.

9. *MARRIAGE IS NOT A CONTRACT, IT IS PERMANENT*

Marriage needs total commitment, love is the glue that makes a couple stick together. Divorce starts in the mind. Never think of divorce! Never threaten your spouse with divorce. Choose to remain married! God hates divorce

10. *EVERY MARRIAGE HAS A PRICE TO PAY*

Marriage is like a bank account. It is the money you deposit into your bank account that you can withdrawn. If you don't deposit love, peace and care into your marriage, you are not a candidate of a blissful home. There is no free love in marriage, You cannot love without giving and sacrificing.

May God Give us The Grace And Wisdom To Build A Heaven on Earth Marriage.Good day everyone

D.K. Olukoya G.O MFM
1. Wedding is a day but marriage is a lifetime .
2. A stingy man who is single will still be stingy when married.
3. Silence . never be misquoted.
4. If you want what no one has had, you must do what no one has done.
5. When God wants to bless you, He puts a person in your life. When Satan wants to destroy you, he puts a person in your life.
6. It is better to be single and alone than to be married to the wrong person.
7. Avoid a contentious woman.
8. 3 men to avoid:
a. A hot tempered man.
b. A womanizer.
c. A drunkard.
9. Marrying a comedian does not guarantee a happy marriage.
10. Never be yoked to anyone who will not be yoked to God.
11. 3 words that echo peace in a marriage:
a. I love you .
b. I am sorry .
c. Thank you.
12. Don't waste your time meditating or dwelling on your singleness.
13. Cohabitation is a recipe for marital failure .
14. Deal with anti-marriage dreams.
15. Ma********on is destruction.
16. Marriage without friendship is like a sky without the sun.
17. If you rush into marriage, you may end up with someone who will bury your destiny.
18. A successful marriage is always a triangle : God, a man and a woman.
19. Why you marry is as important as who you marry.
20. Much happiness in life depends on your marital choice.
21. A man needs divine wisdom from God in choosing who to marry.
22. Do not place your priority on good looks; no woman is ugly, she just needs rebranding.
23. 3 major characteristics to look for in a woman:
a. Fear of God.
b. Wisdom.
c. Discretion (beauty is vanity).
24. The best way to enslave a woman is to show her love excessively - as a rule, women don't run away from where they're pampered.
25. Love is not blind;
infatuation and lust are blind.
26. Love puts God first,
lust puts s*x first.
27. Test every love with your peace of mind, if it is absent, God is not there.
28. If you are a true friend, you will attract true friends.
29. Caring hearts never lack caring hands.
30. Desperation leads to frustration.
31. Bad marriages can be avoided before they begin.
32. Keep yourself pure and your bed undefiled.
33. It is spiritual insanity to plan to convert someone so you can marry the person.
34. Wage war against the devil that fought your parents' marriage.
35. Marriage is a covenant, always look before you leap.
36. It is better to be single and believing God to be married than to be married and believing in God to be single.
37. A broken courtship is better than a failed marriage.
38. Do not marry money or property, marry a person.
39. Be presentable.
_Pls forward it to the singles and married on your contact list._

6 is a number of creation anything enemies have damaged in your life, destiny, marriage, career, ministry God will re create them in this 6th month . Happy new month.