20/09/2026
Not every difficult moment needs the same kind of help.
Sometimes a child wants us to listen. Sometimes they want ideas. Sometimes they need a little space before either one will help.
Guessing incorrectly can leave everyone frustrated—especially when we move into problem-solving before the child has finished explaining.
Try asking:
“Do you want me to listen, help, or give you a minute?”
Three options. No interrogation. No pressure to explain everything at once.
Younger children may need simpler wording: “Cuddle, help or quiet time?” Older children may prefer to answer later. The point isn’t the exact phrase; it’s allowing them some say in what support looks like.
Save this for the next conversation that begins with a sigh, a slammed bag or “Nothing.”
Which option does your child choose most often: listen, help or a minute?
