Simplify People

I am conducting an open-to-public leadership training programme on Mon 13 July 2026. This one-day course is designed for new leaders (new to having subordinates reporting to them) and also existing leaders who have not undergone structured training on leadership. Based on the John C Maxwell Five Levels of Leadership framework, this course helps people managers understand the mindset changes and skills required to become an effective leader.

The course is fully HRDC claimable. If you know of friends who have small teams and only need to send one or two managers / team leaders for leadership training, this is a good option.

For more details please contact me.

Master negotiator tip #8

In cross-cultural negotiations, focus on the person, not the culture.

When we need to negotiate with a person from a different country, or industry, or background, we tend to be alert about the differences in culture, especially when we are not familiar with our counterpart's culture. It is a natural instinct and the intention is good. However we have to be careful not to make the wrong assumptions, read signals incorrectly, or to lose perspective because we incorrectly think that's what our counterpart's culture is like and we should accept it.

One European company negotiating with an Asian company for the first time was surprised at how demanding their counterpart was. The Asian company told them that was the norm when conducting business in Asia, and they accepted that. Only later, after a lopsided deal had been signed, they learned that it was not true.

Don't assume a person will be brash and aggressive in negotiations because of their nationality. Similarly don't assume a person will be reserved and rigid. Knowing the culture can be an initial guide, but it is more important to get to know the person, and to learn how best to work with them at a personal level.

Master negotiator tip #7

Know your counterpart's intention.

Is he here to take, or is he here to truly negotiate a give-and-take? Everyone wants a positive outcome from a negotiation, but not all negotiations will work out. If you identify early that your counterpart is manipulative and wants to take advantage of the situation, you may need to be prepared to walk away, or you must show your strong grasp of the situation and that you will not be easily forced into a bad deal.

When you understand your opponent's intention, you will know how to better negotiate, and when to stop wasting time.

Master negotiator tip #6

Look beyond what you are negotiating.

If both parties fixate on the price, and neither are willing to concede, the negotiation goes nowhere. You need to explore what else you can ask for from your counterpart which is also important to you, or what else you can offer which is important to them.

When teaching negotiation skills, I give my students this negotiation scenario for discussion. A ship has been captured by pirates, and the pirates are asking the shipping company for a ransom. If you are the negotiator of the shipping company, what else other than the ransom can you offer which will influence the kidnappers to be more cooperative? What will you ask for in return?

1. The kidnappers are certainly worried that when you hand over the money there is an ambush with SWAT teams waiting for them. If you can find a way that is safe for them, they will be listening.
2. You want to make sure the hostages are unharmed.
3. You want to ask that the kidnappers do not just rob another one of your ships next month.

When you can look beyond the initial scope, you may find that your counterpart is willing to concede after all, or even you are willing to concede, because you can get something else also important to you.

Master negotiator tip #5

Name it to tame it - address the emotions.

This will sound like a rather "Western" thing. In Asian culture, people usually don't talk about emotions. Certainly we don't consider it in business or work related negotiations. So this feels awkward to us.

Explicitly addressing an emotion can be an important step in preventing a negotiation from being derailed by impulse and ego.

"I sense you are frustrated when I ask that you provide ROI projections." Stating this makes your counterpart realise he doesn't need to get frustrated, or it allows him to express why he is frustrated, so that you can better understand his concerns.

"When I suggest this alternative, you reject it immediately before I explain the details. I feel disappointed and it seems to me you are not willing to hear my perspective." Stating this helps your counterpart see from your angle and empathise with your position. At the same time it anchors you to stay calm.

Naming the emotion resets and centres the negotiation to working out a win-win.

Master negotiator tip #4

Ask open questions.

Don't be fixated on the parts you get stuck on, else you cannot move forward. Ask open questions so that you can discover more about what is important to your counterpart. Open questions invite your counterpart to share information and views which you otherwise might not know. From there maybe there is something else you can offer. An HR Manager looking to retain talent may ask, "What would it take for you to reconsider staying with us?"

Don't ask "why" questions, because they are often interpreted as challenges or judgement. Ask "what" and "how" questions. "How can I structure this deal so that it makes more sense to you?"

Master negotiator tip #3

Keep your own ego in check.

We want to win. We think highly of ourselves. We feel we deserve more. We feel insulted when the other party offers less than what we expected. Sometimes it is because of our ego that we become stubborn and unable, or even unwilling, to see the true picture. So yes, sometimes we are the problem. Now this is not about always giving in to the other party's requests. It is about taking a fair and unbiased view.

In one negotiation I have experienced personally, when presented with the initial offer, my first instinct was this was a lowball offer and an insult. I wanted to respond by stating my ask, and telling them to just take it or leave it. I stopped myself, and spent some time researching the market rates for this nature of work. I found out that even considering the various factors like my experience and the topic of training, the offer was reasonable. I accepted it, and avoided the unnecessary tedious haggling, which might not have produced results anyway. It saved everyone's time, and we all got what we wanted.

Master negotiator tip #2

Understand and address the emotions.

Some negotiations go nowhere because both parties are emotionally charged. People become stubborn and unreasonable when they are emotionally charged. In many negotiations, the physical items being fought over, or the tasks being debated, are not actually the main point. You need to address the emotions involved.

One minor shareholder who has been with the business for 20 years wants to exit and wants to sell his shares to the majority shareholder. He asks for a much higher price than the market value. The majority shareholder wants to buy the shares, but not at such a price. They are stuck because no one is willing to give in. What emotions are not being addressed? For the minor shareholder, money is not the only thing he wants. Even if he does not say it, he wants to feel appreciated and recognised for his contributions to the company for those 20 years of his life. Possibly he is asking for a high price because he feels he has been underappreciated for many years. If this is never discussed or addressed, the two parties may never reach an outcome they are both happy with.

Master negotiator tip #1

Be on the same side.

Most people when they consider themselves in a negotiation, they automatically see themselves in a zero sum game. You and the other party are on opposite ends of a table. When one side gains, the other loses. So both sides fight mercilessly to get what they want. This limiting mindset results in many people walking away from negotiations having gained little or nothing.

What master negotiators do is they learn to understand their counterpart and see from their perspective. They build trust and try to help their counterpart achieve what is most important for them. When you frame a negotiation as a problem to solve together instead of a tug of war, you will be more creative in finding a solution.

How leaders handle incompetence #5

Strong leaders often feel frustrated by the incompetence they see in their organisations. One important thing we must do is to
reflect on our own definitions of competence. Is it really a competence problem, or do you just want things your way? We become leaders because we are good at what we do. From our successful experiences, we have formed opinions and preferences on how things should be done. When things are not done exactly how we would have done them, we feel it's not good enough.

When we ask our teams to complete a task, we have to be precise and fair about what the desired outcome is. We have every right to expect nothing less, and we must also remind ourselves to expect nothing more. Sometimes it is those unspoken expectations that frustrate not only ourselves, but also our teams.

How leaders handle incompetence #4

I learned this simple framework about understanding why people do not perform. Reasons for underperformance can be classified into four types:

(1) Don't know - They don't even realise that they are performing below expectations.
(2) Don't know how - They know what they are supposed to do, but they can't do it. They are not trained. They have never been taught.
(3) Can't - They know how to do the job, but they are not given the resources or the authority to do it.
(4) Won't - They have everything they need to do the job, but they choose not to.

If the reason is (1), then we must clearly communicate our expectations and our standards. If (2), we teach them, train them, or find other ways for them to learn what they need to do. If (3), we need to give them the budget, we need to secure enough other people whose support they need, and so on. (4) is more complicated. Is it because they are forced to work with someone they don't like? Do they feel the work is beneath them? Do they not trust you? There are many possibilities.

This tool is simple, and what it does is it tells us instead of feeling frustrated and complaining about incompetence, we must think deeply about the root causes, identify them, and take the right actions to address them.

How leaders handle incompetence #3

Train your people. Teach them. Guide them. Give them learning resources. Assign them mentors. Motivate them to want to learn and be better at their jobs. I'm not saying this just because I am a leadership trainer and more companies looking for training means more business for me. When you know the reason your staff cannot do their jobs is they don't know how to do it, the simple answer is they need to learn.

In some companies this is a glaring gap. Yet often no action is taken to address it. There is a reason why mature and international companies have a Learning & Development department. This is something SME's can learn from - being deliberate in identifying skill gaps and investing in upskilling the workforce. People need skills to do their jobs. They need skills to be able to create more value for the company.