21/05/2025
Looking at the old photos I’ve already seen in my phone gallery,
my endless stream of thoughts—
I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep tonight.
Suddenly, I glance at my phone—it’s 11 p.m.
At this time, she won’t be asleep yet.
Yes, she’s probably not asleep yet.
Maybe she’s studying, or maybe watching a movie.
As I keep thinking about her,
I end up tapping on her contact.
When the word “Dialing” popped up,
my heart started pounding and I quickly hit cancel.
Did the call go through to her?
I’m filled with anxiety and regret.
My name is Khant.
I’m 22 years old.
A university student.
No particular goals in life.
Knowledge and skill? Far from it.
I don’t have the wit to make people laugh loudly.
I don’t even have any close friends I truly cherish.
The only person who understands and accepts my existence
is just me, myself.
Yes, just like I feared—
a call comes in from her.
My heart pounding, I pick up the phone.
“Hello? Hey Khant,
did you call me?”
“Uh… I accidentally pressed it.”
“Oh… alright, I saw a missed call, so I called back.
If it’s nothing important, I’ll hang up then?”
“Yes, yes—just a misdial.”
Beep.
She hung up.
See that?
How calm and cool she is.
Why did I freeze up, unable to speak?
I’m filled with regret for the words I couldn’t say.
The day I first saw her—
her image is still vividly etched in my mind.
Fair, glowing skin,
wearing a black shirt and full-length jeans.
Her style didn’t even match her personality.
But her demeanor was so simple.
And I love simplicity.
She didn’t have that kind of smile
that captivates everyone around her.
She wasn’t energetic or outgoing either.
But she carried a calm, peaceful presence.
From the very first time I saw her,
I was already building thoughts around her.
Yes, I had already fallen for her.
With no real reason,
I kept ending up around her side of the class.
I’d linger in the canteen she liked to eat at.
During free time, I’d search for her whereabouts again and again.
She never knew.
And so...
She’s my senior.
In her final year at university.
A thesis student.
She would often come to our class to collect surveys—
sometimes with friends, sometimes alone.
The person I had been watching so closely
didn’t even know I existed.
One day...
On the top floor of the university library,
I suddenly saw her reading by the window.
I froze for a moment.
I thought about greeting her.
“But... isn’t it weird to greet someone who doesn’t know you?”
I thought to myself,
and chose to sit on the chair next to her.
And just like that,
sitting side-by-side on the top floor of the library,
our eyes met by chance.
It was in my second year of university
that I got the chance to grow closer to her.
Cool, quiet me became cheerful and friendly around her.
Proud, distant me became gentle and soft.
She completely overwhelmed my heart.
She was extremely hardworking
and very patient.
Even when I asked her questions under false pretenses,
she’d patiently explain with genuine care.
I usually don’t speak much—
but around her,
words just flowed out of me like air.
Whether she enjoyed listening or not,
I didn’t even notice.
Talking about books,
discussing lessons—
a whole year passed like that.
Her thesis is now completed.
This time, once exams are over,
we’ll truly have to say goodbye.
--
Chatgpt Translation
