Sapphire Montessori

This one is big. For me anyways. In my growing up world it was evident to me that the primary focus and attention towards my gender as a girl/female/woman was directly correlated towards how much one's body did or did not fit the beauty standard.

Hot or not? That was the question. (beautiful, cute, adorable, skinny, thin, pretty, all those words came back to the same idea that the thing of value was how a girl looked.)

So many of us got caught up in thinking that if we could be enough of any of those things than we would feel good about ourselves. But 15 years working as a therapist with incredibly beautiful and simultaneously insecure women has taught me something entirely else.

Your image of your body is not about whether or not you meet a beauty standard, it is about whether or not you understand that standard is a distraction from you absorbing the truth about the power and gift of your presence in the lives of the people around you and the greater community as a result.

Confidence and inner security comes when we forgo the distraction of the beauty myth. The power we hold is not in our ability to make people swoon, it is in our capacity to connect and be present.

Let's raise this next generation caring less about how they look and more about how they show up in relationships. Let's see them for who they are and not what they wear or how much they weigh.

We need a revolution of kind, intuitive, connected people. And that can only happen if we are focused less on how we appear and more on how we engage.

https://www.facebook.com/100064749908772/posts/505170958317897/?mibextid=Nif5oz

Kids are often blamed for being emotionally dysregulated and partly for good reason. While children's brains are developing they physically can't manage big emotions. But so often children are singled out for having emotional melt-downs when parents are completely losing control of their own emotions too. It's easy to blame the child as we as parents can feel justified in losing control because kids can be so frustrating. Lets face it, nobody can push your buttons like your child. The problem is, if we lose control of our emotions when our kids are out of control, then we set up a culture of dysregulation. Emotions feed off emotions, so if we are going to bring calm we need to learn to regulate ourselves.

More information on my blog

https://www.thetherapistparent.com/post/creating-a-self-regulated-family