2 Be Good at English

Almost...

Did you hear the story about the cross-eyed teacher? He couldn't control his pupils...

- The English word “Christmas” comes from the old English “Cristes maesse,” meaning “Christ’s mass.” The first recorded use of the word in England was in 1038.
- England’s first recorded Christmas celebration was in York in 1068.
- Decorating Christmas trees began in England in the 16th century. Prince Albert, the husband of Queen Victoria, is credited with popularizing the tradition.
-The traditional English Christmas dinner includes roast beef, roast potatoes, Yorkshire pudding, carrots, Brussels sprouts, cranberry sauce, and gravy.

My wife said she's leaving me because of my obsession with Star Wars.
May divorce be with you...

Definately noticeable...

Congrats! You noticed. Now try to un-notice.

I used to work at an orange juice company. But I was fired because I couldn't concentrate...

Someone tried to sell me a coffin once. I told him, “That’s the last thing I need.”

Did you hear about the two golf courses that fell in love? It was a lawn-distance relationship...