09/10/2026
ADHD Awareness Month
Day 9 – The Weight of Rejection (RSD)
It’s not all imagined,
but not all clear.
Was it real this time?
Or the echo of fear?
A tone, a pause,
an unread reply,
and I’m spiralling,
trying to justify.
They say it’s in my head,
that I overreact.
But I’ve lived the endings
that never came back.
The door that closed softly,
the smile that fell.
Misunderstandings?
I know them so well.
It’s part wiring,
part history’s hold.
A body that panics,
a heart that’s been told
it’s too much, too needy…
…until silence feels safer
than standing proud.
So I scan for rejection,
prepare for the fall,
never sure if it’s real,
or not there at all.
And yet,
some rejections are real.
The cuts that don’t fade,
the ones that remind me
why I am this way.
But I’m learning to pause,
to breathe, to see,
that not every ending
belongs to me.
I can’t stop feeling
as deeply as such,
but I’m no longer ashamed
of caring this much.
Because even in pain,
there’s beauty, reflection.
I found so much love,
not just rejection.
Jannine Perryman 2025
