Heal Your Confidence

𝐀 𝐂𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐖𝐚𝐲 𝐅𝐨𝐫𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐝: 𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐫 𝐂𝐥𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐏𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐚𝐠𝐞

You may understand your neurodivergence reasonably well and still find yourself stuck.

Perhaps something needs to change, but every possible direction feels complicated. You may know what is no longer working without being able to see what would work instead.

A limited-place coaching offer for neurodivergent professionals, practitioners and business owners.

It includes:
• One 90-minute deep-dive clarity session
• Two 60-minute follow-up sessions
• A brief written summary of your agreed way forward
• Completion within four weeks

Summer offer: £180, paid before the first session.

Together, we untangle what is keeping you stuck, identify what genuinely matters to you and create a realistic way forward that fits who you are, rather than asking you to force yourself into another system that does not.

𝐁𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐫 𝐂𝐥𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐏𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐝𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐥𝐲 - https://lnkd.in/e_CggRPJ

Or, if you would like to talk it through first, book a complimentary consultation - https://lnkd.in/eP6_URxm

𝐏𝐬𝐲𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐒𝐚𝐟𝐞𝐭𝐲 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐥 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐲

A neurodivergent employee may feel that their manager is making no effort to understand them.
At the same time, the manager may feel that the employee does not recognise their intentions, concerns or responsibilities.
Both may care. Both may be trying.
Both may feel misunderstood.

𝐀𝐥𝐞𝐱 𝐊𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 highlighted this as the double empathy problem:
the mutual misunderstanding that can arise when people interpret one another through different experiences and communication expectations.

The discussion also recognised that misunderstanding can occur
between neurodivergent people who may have very different needs around planning, communication, pace, sensory experience or flexibility.
Sharing the broad description of neurodivergence does not mean that they will automatically understand one another.
The relationship may work beautifully in one setting and become difficult in another.

Joe added another important distinction during the discussion.
People may believe they are being empathic when they are actually sympathetic, imagining how they themselves would feel in somebody else’s position.
And it does not occur to them to ask first.
Real empathy asks:
“How is this for you?”
“What did you understand me to mean?”
“What would make this easier?”
“What do you need me to know?”

One of the conclusions emerging from the event was that psychological safety does not depend on people always understanding each other correctly.
It depends on whether they can ask, clarify and repair when they do not.

Have you experienced this kind of mutual misunderstanding?
What helped you and the other person move towards clearer understanding?

𝐓𝐫𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐛𝐮𝐢𝐥𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐬𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐦𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬

Psychological safety is often discussed as though it were something an organisation either has or does not have.

Our 𝐍𝐞𝐮𝐫𝐨𝐝𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 & 𝐏𝐬𝐲𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐒𝐚𝐟𝐞 𝐒𝐩𝐚𝐜𝐞𝐬 event offered a much more human understanding of how safety develops.
Trust is usually built in small moments.
You ask a low-risk question and notice how the other person responds.
You admit that something is unclear.
You request a small change.
You make a mistake and discover whether you are helped to recover
or made to feel ashamed.
Each response teaches you something about whether it is safe to be more open next time.

During the discussion, 𝐀𝐥𝐢 𝐁𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐝,
neurodivergent coach and co-founder What Makes The Difference CIC, described trust as something built in small, bite-sized experiences that are gradually negotiated and established through habit.
This matters because many neurodivergent people have learnt that expressing a need can lead to criticism, disbelief or rejection.
Being asked once, “Do you need anything?”
may not be enough.
A person may not yet know what they need.
They may not trust the question, or they may need to see how other people are treated before they feel able to answer honestly.

Joe also spoke during the event about the importance of asking repeatedly, over time, rather than assuming that somebody has no needs because they could not identify one immediately.

Psychological safety requires consistency.
It grows when curiosity is welcomed, responses are respectful and
people are allowed to reconsider what they need as their understanding develops.
Trust cannot be demanded in advance.
It is created through what happens next.

What small response or action has helped you feel safe enough
to ask a question, express a need or try again?

𝐈𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐛𝐞𝐠𝐢𝐧 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞

Too many systems of support begin with the same expectation:
The person must recognise that they are struggling, understand why they are struggling and know exactly what adjustment would solve the problem.
They must then feel safe enough to explain all of this to somebody who may have influence over their job, education or future prospects.
That is a very heavy responsibility.

During our 𝐍𝐞𝐮𝐫𝐨𝐝𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 & 𝐏𝐬𝐲𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐒𝐚𝐟𝐞 𝐒𝐩𝐚𝐜𝐞𝐬 event,
our participants questioned whether support should depend so heavily on individual disclosure and requests for accommodation.

A more inclusive approach would be to offer meaningful options to everyone.
• Could information be provided verbally
as well as in writing?
• Could somebody use notes during an interview?
• Could a presentation be pre-recorded?
• Could people be asked how they work best
without first having to disclose a diagnosis?

𝐀𝐥𝐞𝐱 𝐊𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭,, the founder of Iron and Ember Consulting Inc., spoke about offering options rather than waiting for people to request exceptional treatment.

𝐒𝐚𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐡𝐚 𝐅𝐞𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐬, a neurodiversity, mental health and LGBTQ+ inclusion strategist, also described asking employees about how they work best, rather than asking first about diagnosis.
Universal support does not mean that everyone receives exactly the same thing.
It means that difference is expected rather than treated as an exception.
When flexibility becomes part of the ordinary culture, people are less likely to be singled out or made to prove that they deserve support.
Those who do not yet understand their own neurodivergence may also find ways of working that allow them to contribute more fully.

One of the strongest messages from the event was that inclusion becomes more meaningful when possibilities are offered before somebody reaches breaking point.

What simple option could your workplace or educational setting
offer everyone, without requiring anyone to disclose a diagnosis first?

𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐬 𝐚 𝐬𝐩𝐚𝐜𝐞 𝐩𝐬𝐲𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐬𝐚𝐟𝐞?

At our recent 𝘕𝘦𝘶𝘳𝘰𝘥𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦 & 𝘗𝘴𝘺𝘤𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘰𝘨𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘚𝘢𝘧𝘦 𝘚𝘱𝘢𝘤𝘦𝘴 event,
one point became very clear:
psychological safety cannot be created through policies or good intentions alone.
It develops when people know what is expected of them,
can ask questions without fear of humiliation,
and do not have to hide their difficulties or differences in order to be accepted.

It is present when someone can say:
“I do not understand.”
“I need another way to do this.”
“I made a mistake.”
“This environment is not working for me.”
And the response is curious, respectful and proportionate rather than dismissive or punitive.

Our discussion also highlighted that individual support is not enough
when the wider system remains rigid.
Neurodivergent people cannot be expected to coach,
organise or accommodate themselves out of environments
that repeatedly misunderstand them.
Psychological safety is created through ordinary human interactions
but it must also be reflected in
recruitment, management, communication, working practices and leadership.

It is not about removing every difficulty.
It is about creating conditions in which people can
think, communicate, learn and contribute
without using so much energy to protect themselves.

What helps you know that it is safe to be yourself in a professional or learning environment?

NOTICE of CANCELLATION – Explore Your Neurodivergence with Kassandra Wednesday 5th August 12-1pm

Dear friends

Due to me travelling, there will be no Wednesday lunchtime meeting this week.

Back to normal the following week 12th August, usual zoom link.

All the best,

Kassanda

𝐀 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐢𝐧𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧

Have you ever left a conversation wishing you had said what you really meant?

Many neurodivergent people know that feeling.

Sometimes it is because we are processing information differently.
Sometimes it is because we have learnt through experience that speaking honestly has not always felt safe.
That is why psychologically safe spaces matter.

This Thursday (tonight) we will be exploring what psychological safety means through a neurodivergent lens.

Our panel members all have lived experience of neurodivergence and bring both personal understanding and professional insight to the conversation.

There is no expectation to speak.

You are welcome to come simply to listen, reflect and connect with others who understand.

We hope you will join us.
𝐓𝐡𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐝𝐚𝐲 | 𝟔.𝟑𝟎 𝐩𝐦 (𝐔𝐊) | 𝐎𝐧𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞
𝐉𝐨𝐢𝐧 𝐙𝐨𝐨𝐦 𝐌𝐞𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠
https://us06web.zoom.us/j/83721227998?pwd=xXaXeYOsRs9WDd8RCaUv3XSaw9RkxZ.1
Meeting ID: 837 2122 7998
Passcode: 143797

𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐩𝐬𝐲𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐬𝐚𝐟𝐞𝐭𝐲 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞?

𝐍𝐞𝐮𝐫𝐨𝐝𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐏𝐬𝐲𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐒𝐚𝐟𝐞 𝐒𝐩𝐚𝐜𝐞𝐬
𝐓𝐡𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐝𝐚𝐲 | 𝟔.𝟑𝟎 𝐩𝐦 (𝐔𝐊) | 𝐎𝐧𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞

Psychological safety is often spoken about in workplaces, but what does it actually feel like?

For many neurodivergent people, it is the difference between constantly monitoring ourselves and being able to relax enough to think, contribute and simply be.
• It is knowing that you can ask a question without feeling judged.
• It is not having to mask who you are.
• It is being able to disagree respectfully.
• It is having time to think before responding.
• It is feeling heard, even when your communication style is different.

At Heal Your Confidence CIC, our events are designed to be psychologically safe spaces where neurodivergent people can listen to one another, share their experiences and learn together.

Our panellists all bring lived experience of neurodivergence alongside professional expertise, creating conversations that are honest, thoughtful and grounded in real life.

Whether you choose to contribute or simply listen, you are warmly welcome.
𝐉𝐨𝐢𝐧 𝐮𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐓𝐡𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐚𝐭 𝟔.𝟑𝟎 𝐩𝐦 (𝐔𝐊)

𝐉𝐨𝐢𝐧 𝐙𝐨𝐨𝐦 𝐌𝐞𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠
https://us06web.zoom.us/j/83721227998?pwd=xXaXeYOsRs9WDd8RCaUv3XSaw9RkxZ.1
Meeting ID: 837 2122 7998
Passcode: 143797

𝐌𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐦𝐚𝐲 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐝

A decision can appear straightforward from the outside and still feel almost impossible to make.

One part of you may want change. Another may be exhausted. One part may know exactly what matters, while another is frightened of disappointing people, losing security or getting it wrong again.

Neurodivergence rarely sits neatly in one box. Attention differences, autistic traits, dyslexia, dyspraxia, masking, anxiety, past experiences and burnout can overlap and influence one another.

Heal Your Confidence works with the whole person rather than reducing the difficulty to a single label or productivity problem.

We make room for complexity, but the purpose is not to make things more complicated.

It is to find the thread running through everything and create a way forward that feels clear, realistic and genuinely yours.

𝐀 𝐂𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐖𝐚𝐲 𝐅𝐨𝐫𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐝: 𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐫 𝐂𝐥𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐏𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐚𝐠𝐞
One 90-minute session, two follow-up sessions and a brief written summary.
£180 for a limited number of summer places.

𝐁𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐫 𝐂𝐥𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐏𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐝𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐥𝐲 - https://lnkd.in/e_CggRPJ

Or, if you would like to talk it through first, book a complimentary consultation - https://lnkd.in/eP6_URxm