Ned Shakir Coaching

It’s not every day you get to award someone with a Golden Hedgehog…

Congratulations .business.academy for stepping up!

Me and couldn’t be more delighted

He said he was going to get top marks

And that’s exactly what he did!

It’s amazing what you can achieve when you set your intention

This boy deserves the recognition

He was excellent!

Well done Dylan ♥️👊🏻

Ned | Inspiration to Live Learn & Grow

If you’re mad at someone right now

Tussling with yourself about how upset you are

It feels like 💩

You can change how you feel almost instantly

It’s not by

💩 Calling them and telling them what a #*%& they are
💩 Doing the same to them as you feel they have done to you
💩 Telling your friends, colleagues and anyone who will listen

It’s much easier than that!

Instead of continuing to wind yourself up

💪🏻 Accept you chose to be involved
💪🏻 Decide to do something different next time
💪🏻 Forgive them (and yourself)

You see, forgiveness is not to make them feel better

That’s up to them

Forgiveness is for you to choose to let go of the burden

So that you can feel better

Because what you’re doing right now is only hurting you

Try it

Give yourself the gift of forgiveness

If this has touched a nerve and you’d like to understand more and feel better sooner

Ask me

Delivering world class sales and closing training with at in Northampton

What a phenomenal time to be alive!

Ned | Inspiration to Live Learn & Grow

How often do you choose to spend time at work instead of with family?

Ned | Inspiration to Live Learn & Grow

What I GET to do

Not

What I’ve GOT to do

This morning I had to leave the house in the dark and freezing rain and drive for 2 hours

For the school run

Which is bu****it

But…

One day I won’t be needed for the school run

My kids won’t depend on me for anything each morning

And the chances of spending this time together, will be gone for ever!

This morning we shared the sun rise

It’s not what we’ve got to do, it’s what we get to do

Ned | Inspiration to Live Learn & Grow

Welcome to The Business Q&A here at Vucan Works in Northampton

My name in Ned Shakir and this is your invitation to ask questions about your business every Thursday morning between 9 and 10am

As a leader in your business working in marketing, sales or operations it can be exhausting

This session is available to alleviate some of that pressure

Across the 100s of business owners and leaders I’ve coached, in most cases,

You already have the answers, we just need to ask the right questions

As a community here at Vulcan works there’s a brilliant opportunity to tap into business skills and experience

So if you’ve got questions and you need answers

Reply Q&A to this post

Give me your BS excuse if you like

But

When you must, you will.

When you don’t have enough time it’s because you made a choice

You choose your priority

You choose your distraction

We all make mistakes and we choose to take responsibility (or not)

The next time “I don’t have time” falls out of your mouth

Check in with yourself

What choices have you made?

Ned | Inspiration to Live Learn & Grow

We’re starting a band

Sonny and Shak?

Ned | Inspiration to Live Learn & Grow

I killed a unicorn

And I’d do it again if I had to!

Ned | Inspiration to Live Learn & Grow

If you’re a People Person and you love helping others.

Stop.

It's not helping.

Here’s why…

Ever wondered why you’re always surrounded by upset or excitement

Or

You continually move toward those in trouble who need help

Or

Perhaps you're the kind of person who likes to drop “drama bombs” in the first place!

Whichever role we play (and it could be al 3)

you are perpetuating conflict, dependency, exhaustion and hostility!

Hopefully this isn’t you

But…

I bet you know someone who is

What they are doing is creating, what’s known as, a Drama Triangle.

Developed by psychiatrist Dr. Stephen Karpman in the 1960s

The drama triangle is a social model in psychology that describes a dysfunctional communication

The drama triangle has three roles, the victim, the rescuer, and the persecutor. They represent different positions that people can take in response to conflict or stress.

The roles can be played by one or more people, and people can switch between roles over time.

Let’s see if you recognize any of them:

The Victim:

The victim role is characterized by feelings of powerlessness, helplessness, and vulnerability. Victims often feel like they have no control over their situation and rely on others to save them from their problems.

The Rescuer:

The rescuer role is characterized by a need to help or fix others. Rescuers often feel responsible for solving other people's problems and may become enmeshed in their lives.

The Persecutor:

The persecutor role is characterized by a need to blame or attack others. Persecutors often feel justified in their behaviour and may use intimidation or manipulation to get what they want.

According to the drama triangle, these roles perpetuate conflict and dysfunction in relationships.

The victim role can create a sense of dependency.

The rescuer role can create resentment and burnout.

And the persecutor role can create fear and hostility.

Ultimately, if you find you are part of a drama triangle, it’s time for you accept that you are part of the problem

As a coach or mentor the goal is to help people recognize their patterns of behaviour and shift towards healthier communication and interaction styles

Like developing empathy, taking responsibility for one's actions, and setting healthy boundaries.

It starts with recognizing that the triangle exists

If this is in your world right now

It’s time to get out of the triangle

Ned | Inspiration to Live Learn & Grow