https://www.facebook.com/680446565154183/

Help from mummy and Ruby, London (2026)

Supporting families with SEND, DLA, EHCPs
And much more

🔒 Data Protection Registered
ICO Registered (Ref: ZB965641)
Enhanced DBS checked

Giving families confidence that safeguarding and confidentiality are at the heart of my work.

02/10/2026

🚨 DLA ➡️ PIP DAY 4

🍳 PREPARING FOOD — WHAT ARE THE DESCRIPTORS REALLY ASKING?

Parents… this is one to SAVE. ❤️

🍳 FIRST — WHAT DOES “PREPARING FOOD” ACTUALLY MEAN?

PIP is looking at your young person’s ability to:

prepare AND cook a simple meal for one using fresh ingredients.

“Prepare” includes things such as:

🥕 peeling

🔪 chopping

🍴 getting ingredients ready for cooking

“Cook” means heating the food at waist height or above, for example on a hob or using a microwave.

And there are things this activity DOESN’T include.

For example:

❌ carrying food around the kitchen

❌ carrying the finished meal to the table

❌ difficulty bending down to an oven

Those difficulties may be real…

but they are not what this particular PIP activity is assessing.

🚨 VERY IMPORTANT — YOU DO NOT ADD THE DESCRIPTORS TOGETHER

Imagine your young person:

🧩 needs an aid = 2 points

AND

👀 needs supervision = 4 points.

You do NOT get:

2 + 4 = 6 points.

PIP selects ONE descriptor for this activity.

The one that best reflects their actual level of need, after looking at all the evidence and whether they can do the activity reliably.

🟢 0 POINTS

Can prepare and cook a simple meal UNAIDED.

“Unaided” means they do not NEED:

🧩 an aid

🗣️ prompting

👀 supervision

🤲 assistance from another person.

CHOOSING not to cook is not the same as being unable to cook.

For example:

“My teenager only eats microwave meals.”

That does not automatically mean they score.

DWP still asks:

Could they prepare and cook a simple meal if they needed to?

If the answer is yes and nothing disability-related prevents them doing it reliably, this may still be 0 points.

Likewise:

“Mum always cooks for them.”

doesn’t automatically mean they cannot cook.

We have to look at functional ability.

🟡 2 POINTS — NEEDS AN AID OR APPLIANCE

This means your young person needs a device because of their disability in order to prepare OR cook the meal.

Official DWP examples include:

🪑 a perching stool

🔪 a spiked chopping board

🦿 a prosthesis

Not everything you happen to use in a kitchen automatically counts as a PIP aid.

So ask:

DO THEY NEED THIS BECAUSE IT REPLACES OR SUPPORTS AN IMPAIRED FUNCTION?

And:

COULD THEY COMPLETE THE ACTIVITY RELIABLY WITHOUT IT?

Other things worth THINKING about might include specialist equipment that is genuinely needed because of their impairment.

But always explain:

➡️ what the item is

➡️ why they need it

➡️ what difficulty it compensates for

➡️ what would happen without it.

🟡 2 POINTS — CANNOT USE A CONVENTIONAL COOKER BUT CAN USE A MICROWAVE

This descriptor is often misunderstood.

It does NOT mean:

❌ “They prefer the microwave.”

❌ “They only know how to use the microwave.”

❌ “It’s quicker so we use that.”

The issue is that because of their disability they cannot reliably use a conventional cooker, but they CAN cook using a microwave.

DWP gives the example of somebody with cognitive difficulties who may leave a gas cooker on.

Another example could be some people with unpredictable episodes affecting consciousness where using a conventional cooker creates a significant burn risk.

🟡 2 POINTS — NEEDS PROMPTING

This can be VERY relevant for some autistic, ADHD, learning-disabled or mentally unwell young people.

PIP defines prompting as another person:

🗣️ reminding

❤️ encouraging

or

🧠 explaining

what needs to be done.

This could look like:

“Go and start your lunch.”

“Remember you need to eat.”

“Now chop the vegetables.”

“Put the pan on.”

“Now turn the heat down.”

“Check the timer.”

“Carry on — you’re not finished.”

But here’s the important distinction:

PROMPTING IS VERBAL / ENCOURAGEMENT / EXPLANATION.

The other person is not physically doing the task.

Ask:

➡️ Would they start without being prompted?

➡️ Would they remember the stages?

➡️ Would they continue without encouragement?

➡️ Do they lose track and need someone to explain the next step?

➡️ How often is that actually needed?

And then evidence it.

For example:

🏫 Food Tech teacher reports repeated verbal prompting

📄 EHCP says instructions need breaking into individual steps

🧠 ADHD assessment describes working-memory/sequencing difficulties

📝 home diary shows repeated prompts needed across meals.

🟠 4 POINTS — NEEDS SUPERVISION OR ASSISTANCE

👀 SUPERVISION

means another person needs to be continuously present for SAFETY.

Think:

🔪 knife safety

🔥 hob safety

♨️ burns

🍗 recognising whether food is cooked properly

🧠 poor danger awareness

⚠️ unpredictable seizures

🚨 serious risk around kitchen equipment.

For example:

Your young person may physically be able to chop vegetables…

BUT because of poor danger awareness they repeatedly use the knife unsafely and another person needs to remain present.

That is very different from:

“I like to keep an eye on them because they’re 16.”

Remember the age point:

Lots of teenagers are inexperienced.

The question is whether the disability creates a greater and meaningful risk.

🤲 ASSISTANCE

means another person physically has to intervene and do part of the task.

For example:

🤲 physically helping peel vegetables

🤲 chopping ingredients for them

🤲 physically handling part of the cooking task they cannot manage

🤲 doing part of the preparation because they cannot do it even with an aid.

The other person does NOT necessarily need to do the whole meal.

They only need to be physically involved in part of the activity because the claimant cannot complete that part themselves.

🍗 “THEY CAN’T TELL IF FOOD IS COOKED”

This can be REALLY relevant.

DWP specifically says supervision or assistance can apply where somebody cannot tell whether food is safe to eat because of a:

🧠 cognitive impairment

or

👃 sensory impairment.

For example:

They cannot reliably judge whether meat is cooked through.

They repeatedly eat or serve undercooked food.

They need somebody to check food before they eat it.

Evidence could include:

🏫 Food Tech reports

📋 support plans

🧠 cognitive assessments

👩‍🏫 teacher evidence

📝 repeated examples at home.

🔴 8 POINTS — CANNOT PREPARE AND COOK FOOD

This is a HIGH threshold.

It does NOT mean:

❌ they don’t cook

❌ Mum always cooks

❌ they’ve never learnt

❌ they don’t like cooking

❌ they only eat limited foods.

To meet this descriptor, DWP says the person must be unable to:

PREPARE AND COOK FOOD

even with supervision or assistance.

This is really important:

If your young person CAN prepare food but cannot cook it…

they do not meet 8 points.

If they can cook but cannot prepare…

Again this will not meet the criteria

⚠️ AND NOW THE PART THAT CAN CHANGE THE WHOLE ANSWER…

Every descriptor must be looked at through the PIP reliability rules.

Can your young person do the activity:

⚠️ SAFELY?

Without a real risk of harm?

✅ TO AN ACCEPTABLE STANDARD?

For example, is the food actually safely cooked?

🔁 REPEATEDLY?

Could they prepare food again when reasonably required?

⏰ WITHIN A REASONABLE TIME?

PIP generally treats this as no more than twice as long as somebody without the impairment would normally take.

If they cannot meet ALL FOUR…

DWP should consider whether a different descriptor is appropriate.

🧠 HERE’S AN EXAMPLE

Imagine a young person who:

🔪 can physically hold and use a knife

🔥 can physically turn the hob on

🍗 can physically put meat in a pan.

Someone might write:

“Yes — they can cook.”

But in reality:

➡️ they repeatedly cut themselves because they don’t recognise danger

➡️ they walk away from the hob and forget it is on

➡️ they undercook meat because they cannot judge when it is safe

➡️ Mum has to remain in the kitchen throughout.

That tells a completely different story.

They may be physically capable of the movements…

but they may not be able to prepare and cook safely without supervision.

THIS is why we don’t just answer:

“CAN THEY DO IT?”

We ask:

“HOW DO THEY DO IT — AND WHAT SUPPORT MAKES IT POSSIBLE?”

📄 HOW DO I EVIDENCE THE DESCRIPTOR?

For whichever descriptor genuinely applies, try to build the same structure:

1️⃣ WHAT IS THE DIFFICULTY?

“X has significant difficulty sequencing multi-step tasks.”

2️⃣ WHY?

“Because of their autism/ADHD/cognitive impairment…”

3️⃣ WHAT SUPPORT DO THEY NEED?

“They need another person to prompt each stage.”

4️⃣ HOW OFTEN?

“This is required on most occasions when preparing food.”

5️⃣ WHAT HAPPENS WITHOUT THE HELP?

“They abandon the task / leave pans unattended / do not complete the meal / prepare food unsafely.”

6️⃣ GIVE A REAL EXAMPLE

“Last month…”

7️⃣ WHERE ELSE IS THIS SEEN?

🏫 school

🍳 Food Tech

📄 EHCP

🧠 assessments

🤝 respite

🏕️ clubs

👩‍👧 home diary.

That is MUCH stronger than:

“He has autism and can’t cook.”

🚨 AND PLEASE REMEMBER

You are NOT looking for the descriptor with the most points and trying to make your child fit it.

You are asking:

WHICH ONE ACCURATELY DESCRIBES THEIR REAL FUNCTIONAL ABILITY?

Because good PIP evidence isn’t dramatic.

It is:

SPECIFIC.
CONSISTENT.
RELEVANT.
AND TRUE. ❤️

📌SAVE THIS POST.

And PLEASE SHARE IT.

👇 NEXT: TAKING NUTRITION

And this one has some BIG misunderstandings around autism, ARFID and restricted diets.

01/10/2026

🚨 DLA ➡️ PIP AT 16 — DAY 3

🍳 HOW DO YOU ACTUALLY BUILD GOOD PIP EVIDENCE?

THIS is where I want this series to be different. ❤️

Because “gather evidence” sounds simple.

But what evidence?

Especially when your child is 15/16 and professional involvement may have reduced massively.

One of the biggest reasons I wanted to do this series is because I see so many parents say:

“My child had High Rate Care DLA for years. Nothing has changed. We applied for PIP and they were refused.”

And that is exactly why we need to stop approaching PIP with our DLA head on.

DLA and PIP are not asking the same questions.

Your child can have exactly the same diagnosis.

Exactly the same support needs.

Exactly the same difficulties.

…but if those difficulties are not explained in a way that relates to the PIP activities, descriptors and reliability rules, the decision can look completely different.

That does NOT mean we exaggerate.

It does NOT mean we try to “fit” our child into descriptors that don’t apply.

It means we understand what PIP is actually assessing and describe our child’s real needs in a way that answers those questions properly.

❤️ I want parents going into PIP understanding the system they are actually applying under — not assuming their old DLA award will carry them through.

That’s why we’re doing this activity by activity, properly.

So we’re going to take the PIP activities ONE BY ONE and learn how to look for evidence that actually relates to what PIP is assessing.

Today:

🍳 PREPARING FOOD

PIP is looking at whether your young person can prepare and cook a simple meal for one from fresh ingredients, what help they need and whether they can do it reliably.

So instead of hunting for another diagnostic report…

start looking at what ACTUALLY happens.

🚨 BUT FIRST — DON’T TURN NORMAL TEENAGE MISTAKES INTO “EVIDENCE”

This is REALLY important.

Your child is 16.

And 16-year-olds are still learning things. ❤️

So:

🔥 leaving the hob on once

🔪 cutting their finger once

🍝 burning dinner once

🙈 getting distracted once

does NOT show that they cannot prepare food safely because of their disability.

Loads of teenagers do things like that.

Loads of adults do too! 😂

PIP is interested in whether your young person is at a greater risk because of their health condition or disability.

So don’t ask:

“Has this EVER happened?”

Ask:

“Is there a PATTERN — and WHY is it happening?”

For example:

❌ “He burnt himself once.”

is very different from:

✅ “Because of his poor danger awareness, he repeatedly touches hot pans unless somebody supervises him.”

Or:

❌ “She once forgot the hob was on.”

is very different from:

✅ “Because of her attention and working-memory difficulties, she regularly leaves cooking unattended and needs another person to remain nearby and prompt her back to the task.”

Do you see the difference?

We’re not trying to turn every teenage mistake into PIP evidence.

We’re looking for disability-related functional difficulties.

🏫 NOW LOOK AT SCHOOL

Do they do:

🍳 Food Technology?

🎓 Catering?

🧩 Life skills?

If they do, this could be REALLY useful.

Ask:

🔪 Can they use knives safely?

🔥 Can they use a hob safely?

📋 Can they follow several steps in sequence?

🧠 Do they forget what stage they are at?

⏲️ Can they manage timings?

🍗 Can they recognise when food is properly cooked?

👀 Does someone need to supervise them?

🗣️ Do they need repeated prompts?

🤲 Does someone need to physically help?

🚫 Are they prevented from using certain equipment?

🖼️ Do they need visual instructions?

Find out what support is actually happening.

🧠 LOOK AT THEIR EXISTING EVIDENCE WITH DIFFERENT EYES

Does their:

📄 EHCP

🧠 autism/ADHD assessment

🏫 school report

📚 educational psychology report

🤲 OT report

mention:

➡️ poor working memory

➡️ difficulty following multi-step instructions

➡️ poor danger awareness

➡️ impulsivity

➡️ difficulties sequencing

➡️ needing repeated prompts

➡️ becoming distracted

➡️ difficulties judging time?

That does NOT automatically mean PIP points.

But it could help explain WHY they struggle to prepare food.

That’s the link we’re looking for.

⚠️ THINK ABOUT SAFETY — BUT THINK ABOUT IT PROPERLY

Has there been a pattern of:

🔥 leaving pans unattended?

🔥 forgetting to turn appliances off?

♨️ repeated burns or scalds?

🔪 repeated unsafe knife use?

🍗 consistently failing to recognise when meat is cooked?

🧠 walking away and forgetting they’re cooking?

🚫 using equipment in ways that create a genuine risk?

Then ask:

WHY is it happening?

And:

IS THIS MORE THAN YOU WOULD REASONABLY EXPECT FROM AN ORDINARY 16-YEAR-OLD?

That’s such an important question.

Because age isn’t the PIP test in the way it is with child DLA…

but ordinary age-related inexperience still matters when we’re deciding whether something genuinely demonstrates the effects of a disability.

📄 THEN LOOK FOR CORROBORATION

Has anybody else seen the same thing?

🏫 Food Tech teacher?

🤝 support worker?

🏡 respite staff?

🧩 youth club?

🏕️ Scouts/Guides?

👩‍👧 another family member?

Could there be:

📧 emails?

📋 risk assessments?

🏫 accident records?

📝 school notes?

🧠 professional reports?

📱 messages written at the time an incident happened?

You don’t need evidence of EVERY occasion.

What you’re trying to build is a consistent picture.

🏠 THEN WATCH WHAT YOU ACTUALLY DO AT HOME

Parents can accidentally hide the difficulty because we’ve adapted without even noticing.

You might say:

“Yes, she makes pasta.”

But actually you’re saying:

🗣️ “Put the water on.”

🗣️ “Now add the pasta.”

🗣️ “Turn the heat down.”

🗣️ “Stay in the kitchen.”

🗣️ “Check it.”

🗣️ “That’s not cooked yet.”

🗣️ “Turn the hob off.”

If that’s happening because of their disability…

that’s part of the real picture.

👀 AND ASK THE MOST IMPORTANT QUESTION:

WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF I WASN’T THERE?

Would they still complete the meal?

Would it be safe to eat?

Would they remember every stage?

Would they recognise danger?

Would they finish it?

Would somebody need to step in?

That can tell you far more than:

“Can they cook?”

🚨 DON’T FORGET AIDS AND STRATEGIES

Do they rely on:

⏲️ timers?

📱 alarms?

🖼️ visual recipes?

📋 one-step-at-a-time instructions?

🤲 specialist equipment?

👩‍👧 another person being present?

🔒 restricted access to knives/equipment?

Ask:

WHY is it needed?

and

WHAT HAPPENS WITHOUT IT?

❤️ THIS IS THE WHOLE POINT OF THIS SERIES

Im not going to teach parents to collect random paperwork.

And we’re definitely not going to turn every normal teenage mistake into evidence.

We’re going to ask:

➡️ Is there a genuine difficulty?

➡️ Is it linked to their disability or health condition?

➡️ Is it more than ordinary age-related inexperience?

➡️ How often does it happen?

➡️ What support is actually required?

➡️ What happens without that support?

➡️ Who else has seen it?

➡️ Where can we evidence it?

THAT is how you build a much clearer picture. ❤️

📌 SAVE THIS POST

And PLEASE SHARE IT with another parent approaching DLA ➡️ PIP.

Because “my child once left the hob on” probably isn’t the evidence they need.

But understanding the pattern, cause, risk and support needed might completely change how they explain their child’s difficulties.

👇 NEXT: PREPARING FOOD — THE ACTUAL DESCRIPTORS & POINTS

30/09/2026

🚨 DLA ➡️ PIP AT 16 — DAY 2

👩‍👧 DOES MY CHILD NEED ME TO BECOME THEIR DWP APPOINTEE?

This is a BIG question for lots of parents.

Because for the last 16 years YOU may have:

📝 filled in the forms
📩 opened the letters
☎️ spoken to DWP
💷 managed their DLA
📁 kept track of everything

Then suddenly your child turns 16 and you’re thinking…

“Hang on… am I still allowed to do all of this?” 😳

So today we’re talking about:

DWP APPOINTEESHIP

And the first thing I really want parents to understand is this:

🚨 YOUR CHILD NEEDING HELP DOES NOT AUTOMATICALLY MEAN THEY NEED AN APPOINTEE.

You CAN help somebody with their benefit claim without formally becoming their DWP appointee.

That distinction is really important. ❤️

👤 SO WHAT IS AN APPOINTEE?

If someone is unable to manage their own benefit affairs because of their disability or ability to manage those affairs, DWP can formally appoint somebody else to deal with their benefits on their behalf.

That person is called an:

APPOINTEE

There can only be ONE appointee acting for the claimant.

It could be:

👩 Mum
👨 Dad
👪 another relative
🤝 another suitable person
🏢 or, in some circumstances, an organisation.

🚨 BEING THEIR PARENT DOES NOT AUTOMATICALLY MAKE YOU THEIR APPOINTEE

This is really important.

You don’t automatically become your child’s DWP appointee simply because:

❌ you’re Mum or Dad

❌ you’ve always completed their DLA forms

❌ they have an EHCP

❌ they’re autistic

❌ they have a learning disability

❌ you’ve always managed everything for them.

DWP has to formally appoint somebody.

Until that happens, you are not officially their appointee.

🤔 BUT MY CHILD WILL NEED HELP…

And that’s where we need to separate two things.

Your young person might be able to manage their own benefit affairs…

BUT still need you to:

📖 explain a letter

📝 help them complete forms

📂 organise evidence

☎️ support them during a phone call

🧠 help them understand what’s happening.

That does not necessarily mean they need an appointee.

GOV.UK specifically says:

❤️ You can help somebody with their benefit claim WITHOUT becoming their appointee.

Appointeeship is for situations where the person cannot manage their own benefit affairs.

And that decision needs to be about YOUR young person’s abilities.

Not simply their diagnosis.

🧩 WHAT MIGHT THAT LOOK LIKE?

Imagine two autistic 16-year-olds.

🧑 Young Person A

Needs Mum beside them.

They find forms overwhelming.

Mum explains some of the questions and helps organise their paperwork.

BUT they understand that they are claiming PIP, can make decisions about their benefit and can manage their own affairs with some support.

They may not necessarily need an appointee.

Now…

🧑 Young Person B

Doesn’t understand what the benefit is.

Cannot understand or manage the claim process.

Wouldn’t recognise the significance of DWP letters or deadlines.

Cannot reliably deal with changes or decisions about the claim.

And cannot manage their own benefit affairs.

For that young person, appointeeship may need to be considered.

Same diagnosis.

Very different circumstances.

❤️ That’s why you look at the individual young person.

📞 SO HOW DO I BECOME AN APPOINTEE?

For a young person’s PIP claim, GOV.UK says to contact the PIP enquiry line at the Disability Service Centre.

DWP has a process.

👇

1️⃣ DWP assesses whether an appointee is needed.

2️⃣ DWP INTERVIEWS YOU.

They need to decide whether you’re a suitable person to act for them.

3️⃣ AN APPOINTEE APPLICATION IS COMPLETED.

During the interview, the application form — BF56 — is completed.

4️⃣ DWP MAKES THE DECISION.

If DWP agrees, you are sent Form BF57, confirming that you have formally been appointed.

🚨 YOU ARE NOT THE APPOINTEE UNTIL DWP HAS FORMALLY APPOINTED YOU.

💷 WHAT DOES AN APPOINTEE ACTUALLY DO?

This isn’t simply permission to “help Mum with the paperwork.”

Once appointed, you take responsibility for dealing with the benefit claim on your young person’s behalf.

That includes things such as:

📝 making and maintaining the benefit claim

✍️ signing benefit claim forms

📩 dealing with DWP

📢 reporting changes that could affect the benefit

💷 receiving the benefit payments

❤️ using that money in the young person’s best interests

and

📞 telling DWP if something changes and you should no longer be their appointee.

So becoming an appointee comes with real responsibility.

DWP also warns that, depending on the circumstances, an appointee could potentially be held responsible for an overpayment.

💷 WHERE DOES THE PIP MONEY GO?

If you’re formally appointed as the young person’s appointee, the benefit is paid to you as the appointee.

But…

🚨 It isn’t suddenly YOUR money.

It must be used in the young person’s best interests.

🩺 AND WHAT ABOUT THE PIP ASSESSMENT?

This is another really important bit.

If your young person has a formal appointee, DWP’s current PIP assessment guidance says the assessment provider should make every effort to obtain enough evidence to consider a paper-based review instead of requiring a consultation.

That does NOT mean every young person with an appointee automatically gets a paper-based assessment.

A consultation may still be needed.

But if there is an assessment and your young person has an appointee, the appointee has an important role in that process.

We’re going to cover assessments properly later in this series. ❤️

⚠️ APPOINTEESHIP ISN’T NECESSARILY FOREVER

If things change and your young person becomes able to manage their own benefit affairs, DWP should be told.

Likewise, an appointee can stop acting.

DWP can also end an appointee if, for example, the claimant is clearly able to manage their own benefits or the appointee isn’t carrying out their responsibilities properly.

❤️ SO, PARENTS…

Before the PIP process starts, don’t automatically think:

“They’re disabled, so I need to become their appointee.”

But equally don’t think:

“They’re 16 now, so DWP will expect them to manage all of this alone.”

Neither is necessarily true.

Ask yourself:

👉 Does my young person understand what their benefit is?

👉 Can they understand and deal with important correspondence?

👉 Can they manage the claim and their benefit affairs?

👉 Do they need SUPPORT to do those things…

or are they actually unable to manage those affairs themselves?

That difference matters.

❤️ And please remember:

Every young person is different.

📌 SAVE DAY 2

📲 SHARE this with another parent approaching the DLA ➡️ PIP transition.

Because this is something families really need to think about before they’re halfway through the PIP process wondering who is supposed to be dealing with DWP. 🙈

👇👇👇

🚨 NEXT — DAY 3:

HOW DO I PREPARE FOR MY CHILD’S PIP CLAIM BEFORE WE EVEN START THE FORM?

We’ll look at:

📂 what to start gathering

📝 what information to write down

🧩 examples of support your child actually needs

📆 frequency and fluctuating needs

📑 evidence

🚨 and why I DON’T want you simply copying their old DLA form.

30/09/2026

🚨 SCHOOL SERIES: HOW DO I ACTUALLY ASK SCHOOL FOR A REASONABLE ADJUSTMENT?

After my last post, I’ve had lots of parents contact me about reasonable adjustments

“Okay… but HOW do I actually ask?”

So let’s make this really simple. ❤️

You do not need a special form.

And you do not need an EHCP before you can raise reasonable adjustments.

What matters is explaining:

👉 what is happening
👉 how your child’s disability is affecting them
👉 what disadvantage that is creating
👉 and what adjustment you want school to consider

📝 PUT IT IN WRITING

You can speak to school first, of course.

But I would always recommend following it up in writing so there is a clear record of:

📌 what the problem is
📌 what you asked for
📌 what school agreed
📌 and what happens next

Depending on the issue, you might contact:

👩‍🏫 the class teacher / form tutor
🧩 the SENCO
🏫 the headteacher or another relevant member of staff

🧩 DON’T JUST WRITE THE DIAGNOSIS

For example:

❌ “My child is autistic and needs adjustments.”

That doesn’t tell school what the actual difficulty is.

Instead explain:

WHAT is happening?

WHY is this linked to their disability?

WHAT disadvantage is this causing?

WHAT could help?

For example:

“My child becomes overwhelmed in whole-school assemblies due to sensory overload. This means they are unable to access assemblies in the same way as other pupils and can become extremely distressed. I would like the school to consider whether they could enter later, sit near an exit or access an alternative quieter arrangement.”

That gives school something specific to consider.

⚠️ AND PLEASE REMEMBER THIS…

A school does not automatically have to agree to the exact adjustment a parent suggests.

The legal duty is to make reasonable adjustments.

What is reasonable depends on the individual circumstances.

BUT…

If school says no to the adjustment you suggested, I would ask:

“What alternative reasonable adjustments have been considered to reduce the disadvantage my child is experiencing?”

Because:

❌ “THAT’S OUR POLICY”

does not automatically end the conversation.

A school policy can still need to be considered in light of its Equality Act duties towards a disabled pupil.

📂 DO I NEED EVIDENCE?

If you already have useful evidence, include it.

That might be:

📄 professional reports
🩺 medical evidence
🧩 OT / SALT recommendations
🏫 existing school records
📝 evidence of what is happening in practice

But please don’t assume:

“No diagnosis = no reasonable adjustment.”

or

“No medical letter = school doesn’t have to consider it.”

The legal question is not simply whether your child has a particular label.

It is about disability, disadvantage and what reasonable steps can be taken.

✉️ COPY & PASTE THIS

You can adapt this wording:

“I am writing to request that the school considers reasonable adjustments for my child under the Equality Act 2010.

My child is experiencing [explain the difficulty]. Because of their disability/impairment, this is placing them at a disadvantage because [explain what is happening].

I would like the school to consider the following reasonable adjustment: [explain the adjustment].

If the school does not consider this adjustment reasonable, please could you explain what alternative reasonable adjustments have been considered to address the disadvantage.

Please also confirm any agreed adjustments in writing, how they will be communicated to relevant staff and when they will be reviewed.”

❤️ That is enough to START the conversation.

You do not have to write pages of legal language.

You are explaining the problem and asking school to consider how that disadvantage can be reduced.

📌 KEEP THIS BIT IN MIND

Reasonable adjustments are individual.

What works for one child may not be right for another.

And an adjustment that is reasonable in one situation may not be reasonable in another.

But parents absolutely can ask the question:

“What reasonable adjustments have been considered for my child?”

❤️ SAVE THIS POST

📲 SHARE it with another SEND parent

Because sometimes the hardest part is simply knowing what to say first.

👇 NEXT IN THE SCHOOL SERIES:

🚨 WHAT CAN A REASONABLE ADJUSTMENT ACTUALLY LOOK LIKE?

We’ll go through real-life examples around:

🧩 autism
🔊 sensory needs
👕 uniform
🍽️ eating / ARFID
🏫 assemblies
⏰ transitions
🗣️ communication
🚌 school trips
📚 classroom access
❤️ and more

29/09/2026

🚨 DLA ➡️ PIP AT 16 — DAY 1

YOUR CHILD GETS DLA…
THEY’RE APPROACHING 16…
WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENS NEXT?! 😳

Does their DLA just STOP?

Does it automatically change to PIP?

Do you need to fill in another huge form? 🙈

Does your child have to deal with DWP themselves?

What happens to their money while you’re waiting?

❤️ PARENTS — SAVE THIS ONE.

Because we’re starting right at the beginning.

👇👇👇

🎂 FIRST THINGS FIRST…

Your child’s DLA does NOT simply turn into PIP when they turn 16.

There isn’t a magical switch where:

DLA ➡️ PIP

and everything carries on as normal.

PIP is a different benefit with different criteria.

Your young person will need to make a claim for PIP if they want to move from DLA to PIP.

⚠️ And having DLA already does NOT automatically mean they’ll qualify for PIP.

We’re going to get into that MUCH later in this series.

For now, let’s concentrate on what actually happens.

📩 WHAT HAPPENS WHEN THEY TURN 16?

Sometime around your young person’s 16th birthday, they should receive a letter inviting them to claim PIP.

Parents…

DO NOT PUT THIS ONE IN THE “I’LL SORT THAT LATER” PILE. 🙈

Because that letter contains something VERY important…

⏰ A DEADLINE.

It will tell you how to start the PIP claim and the date the claim needs to be made by.

💷 “WAIT… DOES THEIR DLA STOP WHEN THEY TURN 16?”

NO — not simply because they’ve had their 16th birthday. ❤️

This is one of the first things parents worry about.

If the PIP claim is made by the date given in the letter, their DLA can continue while the PIP claim is being assessed.

So it isn’t:

🎂 Child turns 16

⬇️

❌ DLA instantly stops

⬇️

💷 No disability benefit while you wait.

BUT…

🚨 YOU DO NEED TO ACT ON THAT PIP INVITATION.

If the claim isn’t made by the date DWP gives you, their DLA payments can stop.

So when that letter arrives:

📩 OPEN IT

📆 FIND THE DEADLINE

📁 KEEP EVERYTHING TOGETHER

And get that date in your diary.

👩‍👧 “BUT I’VE ALWAYS DEALT WITH THEIR DLA…”

And THIS is where things can suddenly feel very different.

You’ve possibly spent YEARS:

📝 filling in DLA forms

☎️ speaking to DWP

📩 dealing with letters

💷 managing the benefit

…and now your child is 16.

But turning 16 doesn’t suddenly mean every disabled young person can:

❌ understand a benefit claim

❌ deal with DWP

❌ manage paperwork and deadlines

❌ understand decisions

❌ manage their benefit affairs themselves.

Some young people absolutely CAN.

Some will need some help.

And some young people may not be able to manage their own benefit affairs.

If that’s your child, you may start hearing this word:

👤 APPOINTEE

A DWP appointee is someone formally appointed to manage benefit matters for somebody who cannot manage their own affairs.

⚠️ BUT being Mum, Dad or their carer does not automatically make you their DWP appointee.

And equally…

Helping your young person doesn’t necessarily mean you have to become their appointee.

There is a difference.

❤️

📌 DLA doesn’t automatically become PIP.

📌 Look out for the PIP invitation after their 16th birthday.

📌 There will be a date they need to claim by.

📌 If they claim by that date, DLA can continue while their PIP claim is assessed.

📌 Don’t assume that because you’ve always managed DLA, you’ll automatically manage their PIP claim in exactly the same way.

And one more thing…

🚨 PLEASE DON’T START PANICKING AND COPYING EVERYTHING FROM THEIR OLD DLA FORM READY FOR PIP.

We’re going to talk about WHY later in this series.

Because DLA and PIP are not the same test.

And understanding that difference could be one of the most important things you learn before completing the PIP form.

So SAVE this series.

Come back to it when you need it.

And SHARE it with another parent whose child receives DLA and is getting closer to 16.

Because sometimes just knowing what’s coming next makes the whole thing feel a little less overwhelming.

👇👇👇

🚨 DAY 2 — DOES MY CHILD NEED A DWP APPOINTEE?

We’ll cover:

👤 What an appointee actually is

🧠 When one may be needed

👩‍👧 Whether a parent automatically becomes one

🤝 The difference between helping your child and formally acting as their appointee

📋 How the DWP appointee process works

⚠️ And the responsibilities you take on if you become one.

❤️ SAVE • SHARE • FOLLOW FOR DAY 2

Address

London

Website

facebook.com

Alerts

Be the first to know and let us send you an email when Help from mummy and Ruby posts news and promotions. Your email address will not be used for any other purpose, and you can unsubscribe at any time.

Contact The School

Send a message to Help from mummy and Ruby:

Help from mummy and Ruby

02/10/2026

01/10/2026

30/09/2026

30/09/2026

29/09/2026

Address

Website

Alerts

Contact The School

Shortcuts

Share

Category

Listing takedown request