The SHIFT with Maryyum

Statement in Response to the John Smyth Review
8 November 2024 17:26
We are appalled at the physical, psychological, sexual and spiritual abuse of children and young men perpetrated by John Smyth within the Church of England and associated organisations. This abuse was prolific and abhorrent.

Our thoughts are with all the victims and survivors, who we recognise have carried and continue to carry the life-long impacts of this abuse. We recognise that apart from a few individuals, the Church of England and associated organisations have not listened well or responded well when they became aware of the abuse. This has added to the life-long impacts of the abuse by John Smyth leaving victims and survivors feeling unheard, unsupported and that their experiences have been invalidated and minimised.

We commend the bravery of all the victims and survivors, and advocates who have worked on their behalf, to ensure this appalling, prolific and abhorrent abuse is brought into the light. We acknowledge the significant emotional cost of the actions taken by you, prior to the Learning Review being commissioned and in contributing to the Learning Review itself. We are also aware of the impact of the Report reaching the media prior to the agreed time and the lack of time this allowed for victims and survivors to read the Report, prepare and seek support prior to publication.

We would also like to extend our solidarity to all victims and survivors of abuses within faith settings. Support and advice are available.

As an independent charity that supports all people who have experienced abuse and trauma within faith, we call for faith organisations and communities to implement appropriate measures and procedures to ensure that transparency, accountability and safeguarding are upheld to the highest standard. We call for all organisations and communities to ensure they are trauma-conscious and people centred in response to victims and survivors.

Abuse and harm within faith, including Spiritual Abuse, is not specific to a particular community of faith. We urge all faith organisations to access, digest and implement learning from Learning Reviews and Reports within their own faiths and those of other faiths to ensure we are all aspiring to the highest standard in relation to transparency, accountability, safeguarding, trauma-conscious and person centred practice .

As we continue to digest the learning from the Independent Learning Lessons Review John Smyth QC there may be the need for further comment.

At Replenished Life, we strive to ensure that every person who has experienced abuse and trauma within faith is heard and understood, that they receive quality support from organisations that are well equipped to provide it and that there is an awareness of what healthy faith looks like. Although we are not able to work with children and young people, our resources are for adults of all faiths and none. For more information please see our Support Services page.

STATEMENT IN RESPONSE TO RECENT CASE OF CHILD SEXUAL AND SPIRITUAL ABUSE from Replenished Life, a UK-based organisation dedicated to supporting survivors of spiritual abuse.

‘We are shocked and appalled to hear of the devastating case of child sexual and spiritual abuse that has recently come to light in the United States. Our thoughts are with the victim at this time.

Spiritual abuse occurs when those in a position of relative power weaponise religious edicts or practices to harm vulnerable people. Spiritual abuse is not specific to a particular community of faith, and children face the greatest risk of harm.

As an independent charity that supports all people who have experienced abuse and trauma within faith, we call for religious organisations to implement appropriate measures and procedures to ensure that transparency, accountability and safeguarding are upheld to the highest standard. We would also like to extend our solidarity to all victims and survivors of abuses within faith settings. Support and advice are available.

At Replenished Life, we strive to ensure that every person who has experienced abuse and trauma within faith is heard and understood, that they receive quality support from organisations that are well equipped to provide it and that there is an awareness of what healthy faith looks like. Although we are not able to work with children and young people, our resources are for adults of all faiths and none. For more information please see our Support Services page: https://www.replenished.life/support-and-practical-advice’

Full statement available here:
https://www.replenished.life/blog/statement-in-response-to-recent-case-of-child-sexual-and-spiritual-abuse

•INTERFAITH WEEK 2022•

Kicked off with my sis to discuss faith, feminism, friendship and our origin story . Really grateful to have been invited to speak to such terrific students with support from . Such an engaging and inspiring audience of young minds who are actively seeking ways to combat and in unison. Thank you for the 💐

•FEMICIDE OF THE INDEPENDENT WOMAN•

TW: DV murder
Her name was Sarah Inam.
She was a successful policy professional.
She was brutally murdered by her husband of 3months who bludgeoned her body w/a dumbbell.
The killer’s father is a prominent 🇵🇰 journo.

In cases of VAWG pertaining to the Global South, we often have certain preconceptions about the victim: underprivileged, uneducated, oppressed. Sarah was seemingly the opposite. She defied these stereotypes. A career-driven 37yr old former Deloitte and USAID employee.

Sarah was married to her murderer for just 3months. This was his 3rd marriage. Sarah hadn’t been married before, focusing on her work until she was ready to ‘settle down’. It’s agonising to think that 20+yrs of education, ambition, all she worked hard to earn came down to this.

Like many women in trad patriarchal cultures, she was most def reminded that her accolades were incomplete until she submitted to societal demands to ‘settle’. It’s never a matter of her wants/needs. Educated or not, your grand purpose is to be a subservient daughter/wife/mother.

In forced marriages, ‘honour’-based crimes are far clearer to decipher as the victims’ agency is entirely curtailed from the outset. In cases where the victim is autonomous, many folks question: why did she stay? If you’re asking this question, please avoid victim-blaming.

There are a myriad of reasons. Often times when independent women succumb to societal pressure and ‘choose’ to settle, it’s a barrage of compromises. After all, you ought to be grateful to have been afforded the choice at your ‘mature’ age and you consented to it. Now live it.

Once married, they’re expected to prove their decisions were right. You chose to put your career first, you chose to ‘leave’ marriage until later in life, you chose to marry this man. Now you must show the world that your choices-many of which went against convention-are worthy.

You’re still fitting into the mould of the cookie-cutter, pristine, dutiful wife. It doesn’t matter that he hurts, coerces and violates you. That’s what you signed up for when you ‘chose’ to ‘settle’. You compromise and you conform. Those are the rules of the desi matrimony game.

Murder by a spouse is often the final act in a series of violations that build up over time. In this case 3months. It pains me to think how many red flags and moments of hostility, coercion Sarah had to endure and must have glossed over. I wonder if she confided in dear ones?

I wonder if she ever reached out for help? Was there anyway she could have been freed? My heart weeps for Sarah and the millions of 🇵🇰 women who are suffering in silence out of fear of ‘log kia kehngay’ (what will people say). For women to live freely, this pressure needs to end.

When they see a successful, independent woman 🇵🇰 society doesn’t value her contribution until she’s birthing, rearing its children. 35+yr old career women aren’t asked of their needs/wants/desires for a partnership w/ an equal. They’re stigmatised, told their time is running out.

When an independent 🇵🇰 woman is murdered they’ll shed a few crocodile tears, victim blame, accuse her of riling up the killer and ‘two-sides’ the murder.
Meanwhile, a beautiful, soft soul has had her life cut short at 37yrs old. How many more Sarahs (or Noors) are we to lose?

•FAITH & VAWG•

Such a pleasure to reconnect with our family. So wonderful being in the company of inspiring survivor-centred, women-led member organisations - many of them from marginalised communities - that had only ever met via zoom, finally in the same vicinity, graciously hosted by . A delight to break bread with my sisters from and of course the Domestic Abuse Commissioner, Nicole Jacobs, whose office is doing such incredible work in ensuring that survivors’ and allies’ voices are heard and adhered to. Shoutout to for gathering us all together, and the soulful for bringing us all to tears with her beautiful spoken word.

•FAITH-BASED ABUSE PODCAST•

Repost. This 1.5hr conversation on with such remarkable women practitioners across the faiths was so visceral and cathartic. Grateful to be part of this sisterhood.

Listen here: https://open.spotify.com/episode/4LN2TMkqjZz22WKYQB1wm5?si=Xnjz6ENeQLevLnV-lQPC-A

Reposted • Episode 11 - Sexual Harm in Religious Spaces - is now available! In this episode we are joined by a powerhouse team of people who work at the intersection of sexual harm and faith-based institutions. They come from different faith backgrounds, but have a common goal. You don't want to miss this episode!

•MUHARRAM MEANS: TRUTH•

‘Speak the truth. Even if it harms you.’ - Imam Ali (as).

•MUHARRAM MEANS: JUSTICE•

‘Stand firmly for justice’ (Quran 4:135).

‘Those who are silent when others are oppressed are guilty of oppression themselves,’ - Imam Hussein (as).

May the Waqia-e Karbala serve as a constant reminder to us every Muharram, that we renew our solemn oath to be upholders of justice over oppression, truth over falsehood, and love over animosity.

•MUHARRAM MEANS: PERSEVERANCE•

‘Persevere in patience and constancy. Vie in such perseverance, strengthen each other, and be pious, that you may prosper’ (Quran, 3:200).

Perseverance whilst preserving one’s peace is perhaps one of the most difficult things to accomplish. The struggle is in the journey, it’s on the arduous path we tread. Choosing sirat-e-mustaqeem requires a firm commitment to consistency. It means being present, focused and resolute.

•MUHARRAM MEANS: REMEMBRANCE•

‘Remember me when the truth becomes alone, alone and sad.’ - Imam Hussein (as).

In the trials and tribulations of our day-to-day lives, when it seems as though oppression has triumphed, things appear bleak, and finding the faintest glimmer of hope, the tiniest morsel of resolve seems almost impossible, know that in remembrance of Karbala, truth and goodness shall always prevail.