Anisa Lewis - Positive Parenting Coach

Anisa Lewis - Positive Parenting Coach Anisa is a Positive Parenting Coach who empowers parents by giving them skills and know how to raise happy and confident kids no matter what the challenge.

Serving Parents the world over. Passionate about parenting, education and life. Mum, wife and all round positive person. Helping parents make sense of it all via Parent Coaching and Mentoring. You are welcome to visit my blog at www.anisalewis.com where I muse about parenting, ideas to make your parenting life easier and how what I do can help you and your family.

As September gets closer, there's something I'd love you to tuck away and remember over the next few weeks.Don't judge h...
30/08/2026

As September gets closer, there's something I'd love you to tuck away and remember over the next few weeks.

Don't judge how your child is coping with school by the first few days.

The beginning of a new school year can bring excitement, novelty and adrenaline. New classroom, new teacher, seeing friends again, new stationery, perhaps even the enthusiasm for getting out of bed that mysteriously disappears later in the term!

For some children, those first few days can look surprisingly smooth.

Then comes week two. Week three.

The novelty begins to wear off, the tiredness accumulates and the effort involved in listening, learning, navigating friendships, managing transitions and holding everything together starts to show.

That might look like more tears, irritability, arguments, tiredness, needing more control or simply a child who comes home and doesn't want to do very much at all.

It doesn't necessarily mean something has gone wrong. It might simply be the point at which you're beginning to see what the new routine is asking of them.

So as school begins again, enjoy the good starts. Celebrate the child who skips through the gate and comes home full of stories. But keep noticing once the novelty has worn off too.

What does your child look like when they're genuinely settled?

What do they look like when they're coping, but it's costing them?

And what helps them refill their cup when the day has taken a lot out of it?

We don't need to anticipate problems that haven't happened. We can simply stay curious enough to notice if our child starts showing us that they need something different.

Sometimes the most useful information arrives after the first-day photograph has been taken.

September has always felt much more like New Year to me than January.Maybe it's all those years spent working in schools...
28/08/2026

September has always felt much more like New Year to me than January.

Maybe it's all those years spent working in schools, but there's something about the end of August that makes me want to take stock, clear things out and think about what I want the next few months to look like.

It also gives me a completely legitimate excuse to buy new stationery, which obviously has absolutely nothing to do with it...

I love a new notebook, a decent pen and the feeling of a blank page waiting to be filled. But I think what I really love about September is the sense of possibility that comes with it.

January can arrive with so much pressure to change everything. September feels different. Summer begins to soften into autumn, routines return and there's a natural opportunity to notice what we want to keep, what we're ready to let go of and what might need a little more attention.

That feels particularly true in family life. We don't need a dramatic reset or a whole new set of rules for the new school year. Sometimes we just need enough space to notice what's working, what isn't and what would help family life feel a little easier as we move into the next season.

Perhaps that's one of the reasons I love The Harvest so much. On 17 September, I'm creating exactly that space for parents. A morning away from the everyday noise to pause, think, have some useful conversations and leave with a clearer idea of what you want this next season of family life to look like.

And yes, I imagine there will be notebooks involved.

The danger of judging progress by yesterday.When you're living family life every day, it can be incredibly difficult to ...
27/08/2026

The danger of judging progress by yesterday.

When you're living family life every day, it can be incredibly difficult to see what's changing.

You remember the argument this morning, the bedtime that went completely off track or the fact that you still had to ask four times before anything happened. When someone asks how things are going, it's very easy to answer, "Honestly? I don't think much has changed."

But yesterday isn't always a very helpful measuring stick.

Sometimes we need to look back a little further.

The meltdown that used to last forty minutes might now last ten. Your child might still need help at bedtime, but they're doing one part without you. You might still repeat yourself, but not as often. They may still become overwhelmed, but they're beginning to recognise what they're feeling. Perhaps the biggest change is that you understand what's happening sooner and respond differently.

None of those things necessarily feels enormous while you're living it.

But put them together and look back over six weeks, three months or even a year, and the picture can be very different.

Progress in family life is rarely a lovely straight line. There will still be difficult mornings, wobbly days and moments when you wonder whether anything you've tried has made the slightest difference.

That's why sometimes it helps to have somebody standing outside the everydayness of your family, helping you notice what has shifted as well as what still needs some attention.

If you've been feeling stuck and would value another pair of eyes on what's happening in your family, a Quick Chat is a good place to start. We can talk about where you are now, what you'd like to feel different and whether working together might help.

Because sometimes progress is much quieter than we expect it to be.

Back to school might need to look a little different for your neurodivergent child.We often talk about getting children ...
26/08/2026

Back to school might need to look a little different for your neurodivergent child.

We often talk about getting children "back into a routine", but for some ND children the transition itself is the hard bit. A new classroom, teacher, timetable, expectations, noise, uniform, friendships and being around lots of people again can add up to a lot of change.

So rather than concentrating only on getting them school ready, think about what might make the transition easier for your child.

• Make the unknown more predictable.

Photos, maps or talking through what the first morning might look like can help. Give them the information they need without making school the only conversation.

• Reduce demands elsewhere.

If their brain is working incredibly hard at school, think about where home life can be made easier temporarily.

• Think about sensory load.

Uniform, shoes, noise, smells and busy spaces can all take energy. Wearing shoes in beforehand or removing an irritating label can make a difference.

• Plan for coming home as much as going in.

Your child may need food, movement, silence, screens, connection or time alone before they're ready for questions. What helps them regulate after a day of managing?

And keep watching beyond the first few days.

Novelty and adrenaline can carry some children through week one. Weeks two and three can tell us much more about what the new routine is actually costing them.

The aim isn't to make your child cope with September in the same way as everybody else. It's to understand where the extra load might be for them and make thoughtful adjustments before they become overwhelmed. Sometimes the smallest adjustment can make an enormous difference.

If you're already wondering how September is going to work for your family, this is exactly the sort of thing we can unpick together. Book a Quick Chat and let's start with what's happening for your child.

5 things I'd love every parent of a child starting Reception to know.Starting school for the first time is a huge milest...
25/08/2026

5 things I'd love every parent of a child starting Reception to know.

Starting school for the first time is a huge milestone, and at this point in August it's very easy to start wondering whether your child is "ready". After years working in education, particularly with younger children, there are a few things I'd love parents to know before that first day arrives.

They don't need to arrive knowing how to read.

Please don't spend these last days worrying about phonics, sight words or whether somebody else's child can already write their name. That's what school is there to teach. Read together because you both enjoy it, not because a deadline is suddenly approaching.

Practise the ordinary things.

Can they recognise their own belongings, open their water bottle, get their coat on or ask an adult for help? Can they manage their lunchbox or tell somebody when they need the toilet? These everyday bits of independence can help a big new environment feel a little easier to navigate.

Talk about what will happen, but don't make school the only conversation.

A child who's feeling unsure doesn't necessarily need to be asked every day whether they're excited about starting school. Give them enough information to make the unfamiliar more predictable, answer their questions when they come, and then let them get back to enjoying the rest of their summer.

Expect them to be tired.

School asks a lot of a four and five year old. Listening, sharing space, following instructions, managing friendships, coping with noise, remembering routines and being away from their familiar people all take energy. Don't be surprised if some of that tiredness comes out as big emotions or behaviour once they're safely back at home.

Your child doesn't need to start school like anybody else's child.

Some will run through the door. Some will hold on tightly. Some will come home and tell you every tiny detail, while others will apparently have spent six hours doing absolutely nothing! Starting differently doesn't mean they're doing it wrong.

And perhaps this is the bit I'd most like parents to remember. School readiness isn't simply about what your child can do before they arrive. Feeling safe, knowing there are adults who will help them and having home as their secure place to return to matter enormously too.

So enjoy these last summer days together. You don't need to turn them into a Reception preparation programme. There will be plenty of time for learning when they get there.

3 questions to ask yourself before responding to your child's behaviourSometimes the behaviour we're responding to didn'...
24/08/2026

3 questions to ask yourself before responding to your child's behaviour

Sometimes the behaviour we're responding to didn't start in the moment we noticed it.

The enormous reaction when it's time to leave the park might have started with being hungry half an hour ago. The argument with a sibling might have followed an embarrassing moment we didn't see. The refusal to put shoes on might have very little to do with the shoes.

Before you respond, try asking yourself:

1. What happened before this?

Think beyond the last thirty seconds. Tiredness, hunger, sensory overload, disappointment, embarrassment, a change of plan or something that happened earlier can all show up later as behaviour.

2. What might my child be trying to communicate?

Instead of starting with "How do I stop this?", try "What might they need me to understand?" Behaviour often gives us information before children have the words to explain it.

3. What does my child need from me right now?

A boundary may still be needed, but so might space, food, connection, movement, reassurance or simply a chance to calm down before you talk about what happened.

Curiosity doesn't mean ignoring behaviour or removing boundaries. It gives us more information so we can respond to the child, rather than only reacting to the moment.

Save this for the next time you find yourself wondering, "Where on earth did THAT come from?"

Sunday ReflectionWe spend a lot of time preparing our children to go back to school.We think about uniform, shoes, bags,...
23/08/2026

Sunday Reflection

We spend a lot of time preparing our children to go back to school.

We think about uniform, shoes, bags, lunches, mornings and whether everything still fits. We might start talking about new teachers, changing classrooms, friendships or what September is going to look like.

But I wonder if there's another kind of preparation worth doing too. Preparing ourselves for the child who comes home from school.

As you head into the last part of the summer holidays, take a moment to think about your child:

• What do they look like when they've held it together all day?

• How do you know when they're overwhelmed rather than being difficult?

• Do they need to talk when they get home, or do they need some space first?

• What helps them regulate when their battery is running low?

• Which expectations could you temporarily lower while they find their feet again?

Going back to school asks a lot of children. New routines, noise, people, expectations, learning, transitions and simply being "on" for much more of the day.

That doesn't mean we need to tiptoe around them or expect September to be difficult. It simply means we can be curious about what the transition asks of our particular child and what might help.

So before September arrives, don't only think about what your child needs to be ready for school.

Think about what they might need from you when they come home from it.

This is a little different from the things I usually share here, but every now and again I put my event-hosting hat on a...
23/08/2026

This is a little different from the things I usually share here, but every now and again I put my event-hosting hat on and bring together brilliant people for conversations that stretch beyond parenting and family life.

And this is one I am particularly excited about.

BE THE LEADER is back.

On Thursday 22nd October, I’ll be hosting Lisa Bean at the beautiful Devonshire Arms, Bolton Abbey, in North Yorkshire for a morning of ideas, conversation, connection and fresh thinking.

If you’ve ever heard Lisa speak, you’ll know the effect she can have. She makes you think bigger, question what you’re doing and, importantly, want to actually DO something with all those ideas buzzing around your head.

This time, we’re adding something new too. Alongside Lisa’s session, we’ll have a panel bringing different perspectives from the worlds of content, marketing, digital media and community, plus plenty of opportunity to meet people, make new connections and have some really good conversations.

Be The Leader isn’t just for business owners. It’s for people leading within organisations, building their careers, developing ideas, growing their influence or wanting to make more of the expertise and experience they already have.

You don’t need to have “leader” in your job title either. If you want to think bigger about what you do and where it could take you next, this morning is for you.

BE THE LEADER
Thursday 22nd October 2026
9.30am to 12.30pm
The Devonshire Arms, Bolton Abbey

Ticket sales open this afternoon, so if you are interested in joining us, comment below or message me.

It would be great to have you join us,

Anisa

5 ways to stay connected when your teenager doesn't want to talkAs our children get older, connection can start to look ...
21/08/2026

5 ways to stay connected when your teenager doesn't want to talk

As our children get older, connection can start to look very different. The child who once told you every tiny detail of their day may suddenly answer "How was school?" with "Fine" and disappear upstairs.

It doesn't necessarily mean they don't want or need you. Sometimes we need to change how we create the opportunities for conversation. So, if conversation with your teenager feels a little harder to come by at the moment, here are five ways to keep the connection going without forcing it.

1. Stop making eye contact.

Some of the best conversations happen when you're both looking somewhere else. In the car, walking the dog, cooking, folding washing or sitting side by side can feel much less intense than "Can we have a chat?"

2. Don't fill every silence.

Give them time to find the words. Silence can feel uncomfortable to us, but jumping in with another question can close down the very conversation we're hoping to have.

3. Talk about the ordinary stuff.

Connection isn't built only through big conversations about feelings, friendships and school. Send them the ridiculous video. Ask their opinion. Tell them something funny that happened. The everyday conversations keep the door open for the important ones.

4. Ask whether they want listening or help.

"Do you want me to help you think about this, or do you just need me to listen?"

It's a simple question, but it stops us from jumping into problem-solving when they actually just want somewhere safe to put what they're feeling.

5. Leave the door open.

If they don't want to talk right now, let them know that's okay and that you're there when they do. Then resist checking again five minutes later!

Teenagers don't always connect on our timetable.

Keep creating the opportunities. Keep noticing the small conversations. Keep showing them that when they do choose to talk, you're a safe place for their words to land.

Save this one for the next time "Fine" is apparently the complete account of your teenager's day.

September has a habit of arriving with a very long list of things we think we need to sort out.New routines. New expecta...
21/08/2026

September has a habit of arriving with a very long list of things we think we need to sort out.

New routines. New expectations. Things that worked before summer suddenly not working quite so well anymore.

But before we start adding more, perhaps we need to stop and take stock.

What is working in your family?

What do you want to carry forward into autumn?

What isn’t serving you anymore?

And what might your family need to do differently in this next season?

That is what The Harvest is about.

Three hours away from the day-to-day to think about your family with practical coaching from me, honest conversation, time to reflect and the company of other parents who are figuring all of this out too.

And yes, there will be pastries.

Thursday 17th September
9.30am to 12.30pm
The Devonshire Arms, Bolton Abbey

Tickets are £65 and booking is open now.

I’d love to have you in the room.

Booking link: https://anisalewis.as.me/theharvest

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Ilkley
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