Anisa Lewis - Positive Parenting Coach

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Anisa Lewis - Positive Parenting Coach Anisa is a Positive Parenting Coach who empowers parents by giving them skills and know how to raise happy and confident kids no matter what the challenge.

Serving Parents the world over. Passionate about parenting, education and life. Mum, wife and all round positive person. Helping parents make sense of it all via Parent Coaching and Mentoring. You are welcome to visit my blog at www.anisalewis.com where I muse about parenting, ideas to make your parenting life easier and how what I do can help you and your family.

One of the things I love about bringing people together is the conversations that happen when we give ourselves time awa...
16/10/2026

One of the things I love about bringing people together is the conversations that happen when we give ourselves time away from the usual demands of work and life.

Next Thursday, we're doing exactly that at Be The Leader, and I'd love you to join us.

You might be running your own business, developing your career, working within an organisation or considering what comes next. You don't have to arrive with a grand plan or a particular job title. What matters is having the opportunity to think about where you're going, what you want to be known for and how you're communicating the value of what you do.

I'll be joined by Lisa Bean, with Sophie Ozbek and Chris Howard bringing their perspectives to our panel conversation. There will be plenty of opportunity to ask questions, share experiences and hear ideas that might help you look at your own next steps differently.

I know how easy it is to spend our days responding to what needs doing, leaving very little time to consider the bigger picture. That's one of the reasons I created Be The Leader. It's a chance to step away from the everyday, connect with others and give yourself some proper thinking time.

We're meeting at The Devonshire Arms, Bolton Abbey, on Thursday 22 October, from 9.30am to 12.30pm. Tickets are £65.

If you've been considering coming, I'd love to see you there. Send me a message and I'll share the booking details.

Half-term is on the horizon, and depending on where you live, you might be looking at one week off school or two!For som...
15/10/2026

Half-term is on the horizon, and depending on where you live, you might be looking at one week off school or two!

For some families, that change of pace is very welcome. No school runs, packed lunches, homework or trying to get everybody out of the door on time. For others, the change in routine can bring its own challenges, particularly when children are used to knowing what happens next.

Before you start filling the calendar with activities, here are five things worth considering that might make half-term a little easier.

1. Keep a few familiar anchors in the day.

You don't need a school-style timetable, but familiar mealtimes, bedtime routines or a predictable start to the morning can help children feel more settled. A little structure can go a long way.

2. Let your children know what's happening.

Some children are quite happy to take each day as it comes. Others feel much more comfortable knowing what the plan is. A quick chat over breakfast, a simple visual plan or talking through tomorrow's activities the night before can make a difference.

3. Don't underestimate the need for downtime.

Days out, seeing friends and visiting family can all be lovely, but they can also be tiring. Think about what your child might need afterwards. A quieter afternoon, time alone or simply being at home without another activity planned can be just as valuable.

4. Have a plan B, but keep it simple.

The weather changes, somebody is tired or an activity doesn't go quite as expected. Having an alternative in mind can help, but it doesn't need to be another exciting outing. A film, some baking or a trip to the park might be enough.

5. Remember that your capacity matters too.

Half-term isn't a holiday for every parent. You might be juggling work, childcare, different schedules and all the usual demands of family life. Think about what is realistic for you, not just what you'd like your children to experience.

The aim isn't to create a wonderful half-term where everybody is happy all the time. It's to find a rhythm that works for your family, with enough flexibility for the days that don't quite go to plan.

You don't need to do all five. Have a look at what tends to make school holidays difficult in your house and choose one thing that might help this time.

What's the one thing that makes school holidays easier in your family?

I spend a lot of time talking to parents about making family life easier, and sometimes the things that make the biggest...
14/10/2026

I spend a lot of time talking to parents about making family life easier, and sometimes the things that make the biggest difference are ridiculously small.

Not a new parenting strategy or a beautifully organised routine. Just the little shortcut you've discovered that removes one unnecessary battle, saves five minutes in the morning or means you don't have to remember yet another thing.

It might be keeping socks downstairs because going back upstairs to find them every morning was driving everybody mad. Buying three identical water bottles because apparently only one particular bottle will do. Having breakfast in the car on certain mornings, putting the toothbrush somewhere unexpected or abandoning the idea that clothes have to be folded before they go in a drawer.

Those tiny adaptations fascinate me because they're often where real family life and all the parenting advice we're surrounded by finally meet.

We can spend a lot of energy trying to make our families fit systems that aren't working, when sometimes changing the system is far easier.

So I want to know yours.

What's the slightly random thing you do in your house because it simply makes family life easier?

A lot of my work with parents starts with what can feel like two very different versions of the same child.There's the c...
13/10/2026

A lot of my work with parents starts with what can feel like two very different versions of the same child.

There's the child nursery or school sees, who might be described as settled, helpful, engaged or doing really well. Then there's the child their parent sees at pick-up, in the car, on the way home or once they're back through the front door.

Sometimes the shift happens almost immediately. The smallest request is suddenly too much, their sibling only has to look at them the wrong way, or they're crying, shouting, retreating or seemingly unable to cope with things they usually manage.

For parents, that difference can be incredibly confusing, particularly when you're trying to explain what you're seeing and the response is, “We don't see any of that here.” But I don't think we should be asking which version is the “real” child. I'm much more interested in what the difference might be telling us.

What has their day asked of them? How much energy have they used concentrating, communicating, transitioning, coping with sensory input and navigating other people? How much have they been holding together, and what changes when they get somewhere they feel completely safe?

That doesn't mean every difficult moment afterwards can simply be explained away as “they've been masking all day”. We still need to be curious about what is happening for the individual child, what else might be contributing and what they may need from us.

The difference between what nursery or school sees and what happens afterwards gives us information. When I'm working with a family, sometimes that's exactly where we start, looking at the whole picture rather than treating what happens afterwards as something separate that simply needs to be stopped.

13/10/2026

When we talk about emotional regulation, the conversation often focuses on our children. How can we help them manage their frustration, disappointment or anger?

But parents have emotions too, and sometimes we're so busy trying to support everyone else that we forget to notice what's happening for us.

I think one of the most valuable things we can do is become curious about our own responses, particularly those moments when we react in ways that don't quite reflect the parent we want to be.

We won't always get it right, and that's okay. What matters is recognising those moments and finding our way back to connection.

This clip comes from today's Walking on Eggshells Live, where we explored some of the emotions and behaviours that can make family life feel particularly challenging.

If you couldn't join me, you can catch the full replay over on my YouTube channel.

There is a particular kind of tiredness that comes from constantly trying to anticipate somebody else's emotions.Thinkin...
12/10/2026

There is a particular kind of tiredness that comes from constantly trying to anticipate somebody else's emotions.

Thinking about when to ask. How to phrase it. Whether today is the day to hold the boundary. Whether changing the plan is thoughtful flexibility or whether you're doing it because you simply don't have the capacity for what might follow.

If you recognise that, tomorrow's Live is for you.

Walking on Eggshells isn't about blaming children for having big emotions or telling parents they need to be firmer. I want to look at what's happening underneath those reactions and how we can support a child who genuinely finds parts of life incredibly difficult, while also noticing what is happening to everybody else in the family.

We'll talk about emotional regulation, capacity, the adjustments that genuinely help and what can happen when, almost without noticing, family life starts revolving around trying to keep everything steady.

Most importantly, I want you to leave with some things you can actually use in your family, rather than simply knowing you should all be calmer!
Walking on Eggshells is tomorrow, Tuesday 13th October at 12pm. It's online, free and 30 minutes.

Grab your place: https://anisalewis.as.me/LivewithAnisa

There are lots of things we do in family life simply because that's how we've always done them.The bedtime routine happe...
11/10/2026

There are lots of things we do in family life simply because that's how we've always done them.

The bedtime routine happens in a particular order. Dinner is supposed to look a certain way. Homework gets done at a particular time. We say yes to an activity every week even though getting everybody there has become exhausting.

Sometimes those routines make family life easier. Sometimes we keep doing them long after they've stopped working for the family we have now.

So this Sunday, perhaps ask yourself:
• Is there something in our family life that feels harder than it needs to at the moment?
• Are we doing it this way because it genuinely works for us, or because it's how we think it “should” be done?
• Is there a routine or expectation that worked six months ago but doesn't quite fit us now?
• What could I simplify this week?
• Is there anything I could simply stop doing?

You don't have to redesign family life before Monday morning.

Sometimes it's enough to notice that the thing creating pressure isn't actually essential. Or that your child has changed, your circumstances have changed, your capacity has changed and the way your family does something is allowed to change too.

The easiest system is often the calmest system.

If you mostly know me through my parenting work, you might be wondering where Be The Leader fits.Before starting my busi...
10/10/2026

If you mostly know me through my parenting work, you might be wondering where Be The Leader fits.

Before starting my business ten years ago, I was a deputy head. Leadership was very much part of my working life then, and it hasn't disappeared simply because I now work for myself.

Running a business has asked me to lead in very different ways. I've had to decide what I want my work to stand for, trust my own ideas, put myself forward for opportunities, build relationships, communicate what I do and become increasingly comfortable being visible for the things I know something about.

Some of that has come naturally. Some of it definitely hasn't.

I've also spent ten years working with, speaking to and getting to know some incredibly knowledgeable people who don't always recognise the value of what they know, or aren't quite sure how to communicate it so that other people recognise it too.

That's a big part of why I created Be The Leader.

It isn't about becoming louder or collecting another title. It's about recognising the experience, expertise and ideas you already have, getting clearer about what you want to be known for and thinking about how you step more fully into that.

On 22nd October, Lisa Bean and I will be at The Devonshire Arms, with Sophie Ozbek and Chris Howard joining us for our panel conversation.

There'll be different perspectives, honest conversation and some proper time away from the day-to-day to think about where you're going next.

You don't have to run a business to come. You might be growing one, developing your career, leading within an organisation or simply know that you're ready for something to shift.

Be The Leader
Thursday 22nd October
9.30am to 12.30pm
The Devonshire Arms, Bolton Abbey
£65

If you'd like to join us, follow the link and book yourself a place: https://anisalewis.as.me/betheleader

I talk about teeth brushing far more than I ever imagined I would when I became a parent coach.It comes up all the time....
09/10/2026

I talk about teeth brushing far more than I ever imagined I would when I became a parent coach.

It comes up all the time.

Sometimes it's the morning brush that brings everything to a halt before the day has really started. Sometimes everybody is exhausted by bedtime and those final two minutes feel like one demand too many. For some children, both are difficult.

Of course, we all know our children need to brush their teeth. Knowing that isn't usually the difficult bit. It's working out how to make it happen when your child really doesn't want to, or when something about teeth brushing feels genuinely hard for them.

So before trying another reward chart, adding another reminder or finding yourself saying “Just brush your teeth!” for the seventeenth time, get curious about the bit they're struggling with.

Is it the taste or texture of the toothpaste? The feeling or sound of the toothbrush? Having someone else brush their teeth? Stopping what they're doing to go to the bathroom? Remembering all the steps and getting started? Or simply being asked to do one more thing when their brain or body isn't ready for it?

Once we have an idea of what's making it difficult, we can start experimenting.

Try a different flavour or an unflavoured toothpaste if taste is the sticking point. Experiment with different toothbrushes if the sensation is uncomfortable. If stopping what they're doing causes the difficulty, give some warning before it's time to brush rather than announcing it out of nowhere.

If getting started is the hurdle, go with them and begin the routine together rather than repeating the instruction from another room. Some children might manage better brushing somewhere other than the bathroom, or at a slightly different point in the routine. A visual reminder can help a child who struggles to hold all the steps in their head.

You don't have to try all of those things. In fact, please don't!

Pick the bit that seems hardest for your child and experiment with making that one bit easier.

The teeth still need brushing. We're not removing that boundary. We're simply recognising that if something needs to happen every single day, twice a day, it's probably worth finding a way of making it more manageable for everyone involved.

Given how often this comes up in my conversations with families, I suspect teeth brushing is a surprisingly big thing in quite a few houses.
Is it in yours?

One of the hardest things about parenting a child who feels things very deeply is knowing when to help and when to hold ...
08/10/2026

One of the hardest things about parenting a child who feels things very deeply is knowing when to help and when to hold your nerve.

Your child is disappointed, angry, anxious or overwhelmed and every part of you wants to make it better. So you explain again, offer another option, change the plan, negotiate, reassure, distract or try to find the one thing that will make the feeling disappear.

Sometimes one of those things is exactly what they need. Sometimes, though, there isn't anything for us to fix.

Our child might simply be disappointed that the answer is no. They might be furious that their sibling got there first, upset that plans have changed or overwhelmed by something we can't change for them.

We can still be alongside them. We can acknowledge that this feels really hard, reduce demands if they're overwhelmed, give them space if that's what they need, stay close if they want us there and think about what might make the situation easier to navigate.

But supporting an emotion isn't necessarily the same as making it go away.

I think this can be particularly difficult when we've become used to anticipating our child's reactions. Without really noticing, we can find ourselves working incredibly hard to keep everything steady, not just supporting our child when big feelings arrive, but trying to prevent those feelings from happening in the first place.

That's one of the things I'm going to be exploring in next week's Walking on Eggshells Live. Not how to stop children having big emotions, but how we can understand what's underneath them, support our children through them and notice what happens to the rest of family life along the way.

Walking on Eggshells is next Tuesday, 13th October at 12pm. It's online, free and 30 minutes. If you can't join me live, register anyway and I'll send you the replay.

If you'd like to join me, book here: https://anisalewis.as.me/LivewithAnisa

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