Grace Edy

Working parents, I've been pondering something and would love your thoughts 👇🏽👇🏽👇🏽

How do you show your parental leave on your CV?
A. Don't mention it
B. Specifically call it out
C. Have a note under the relevant employer

Also, have you updated your LinkedIn profile to include being a parent? 😉

“If you hang out with chickens, you're going to cluck and if you hang out with eagles, you're going to fly.”
― Steve Maraboli

Let’s talk about lunch🥪 and diminishing returns📉.

🙅🏽‍♀️No this is not a post about economics or cooking this is a post about your wellbeing💪🏽 during busy times of the year.

I remember hearing it a million times during my corporate career:

“I don’t have time for lunch today.” 😞

I’m here to do some maths🔢 with you to help you rethink why you should take lunch (or any time to look after yourself), especially during busy times at work.

This time of year can be extremely straining with a large amount of work to complete combined with incredibly tight deadlines – it always used to feel like you were running a sprint in the middle of running a mammoth marathon. 🏃🏽‍♀️

So it makes sense to feel pulled in two directions (sprint vs marathon) which makes it increasingly hard to find a balance between pushing forwards while still making it to the end of the race. ⏩

❓How do you push through the sprint while still making it through the marathon?

Great question!

Let’s crunch some numbers (yay, numbers!) to show how prioritizing your wellbeing during a sprint is incredibly important to make sure you get through the sprint as quickly as possible while also making it through the long haul and avoiding burnout.

Say your efficiency and effectiveness coming into busy season was at 100%🔋 (obviously no one works at 100% but let’s go with it to make the maths easy).

When work starts to get fiercely fast-paced it is easy to skip lunch and end up getting take-out night after night. Mix that with not taking time to rest your body and mind – let’s be honest it is only expected that your efficiency will start to slip. Energy levels ⚡will dip, focus will get hazy, and emotions get stretched.

All these factors eat into your 100% and without even noticing you could be at 90%.

For every hour you put into your work you are producing 10% less output. 📉

You can do the maths.

If you are working a 60-hour week that is 6 ineffective hours EVERY WEEK (that is almost 1 full working day).

Looking at this another way, you could take a half an hour lunch break and go for a 30-minute run 6 times a week to keep you at 100% and you would still get through the same amount of work.

And did I mention you would be happier and healthier at the same time?

I know it is easier said than done, especially if you work in an environment that focuses on timesheets but let’s start the shift in thinking. ⌛

⭐Let’s talk about resting, eating healthily and exercising this busy season so that you keep close to your 100%.

⭐Let’s talk about moving away from expectations around ‘hours sat at a desks’ for ‘work produced’.

⭐Let’s talk about creating a healthy and fun busy season.

Drive the change for a healthier and happier you.

“Sometimes the most important thing in a whole day is the rest we take between two deep breaths” - Etty Hillesum

“I don’t deserve my dreams.”💔

As a coach, it’s my job to empathise (listen and understand feelings) and not sympathise (share feelings) but sometimes, man oh man, it’s hard not to feel all the feelings. This one always makes my heart sink. 😢

If you feel like you don’t deserve your dreams, it makes sense that you aren’t going to take action to achieve them because it's terrifying to think that you are about to ‘validate’ your lack of value and deserving. It's safer not to try. To make excuses. To live small.

Thinking you aren’t deserving, leads to you feeling unworthy which is not going to inspire you to drive forwards and grab the challenge with both hands. Having these feelings starts you off from a place of low confidence, hesitance and low energy, and so of course everything is going to feel like it’s fighting you and keeping you stuck.

This lack of energy and action leads to self-sabotage because deep down you don’t believe in yourself... and so even if you do muster up the courage to take action there is a part of you that is holding back – just in case it doesn’t work out.

This holding back then becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, progress is not made or is frustratingly slow which confirms "I don’t deserve my dreams".

Know that you are not alone if you feel that you don’t deserve to live the life of your dreams but the thing is you DO deserve to live a life of happiness and purpose.

🤔What would you do if you believed you deserved your ideal life?

🤩Because you are worthy and deserving no matter who you are.

⭐One of the most surprising benefits of confidence is that it leads to decisive action. ⭐

Decisive action means that you save🔋 the energy you would have used to overthink and investigate🔎 (and investigate … and investigate… and investigate).

That saved energy can then be used to explore the new space you find yourself in, giving you the mental capacity to access the change and make adjustments from there.

Sometimes trust yourself and put your best foot forward. 👣

Want to read more? 👇🏽

LinkedIn Asked People to Give Advice to Their 20-Year-Old Selves. The Same Lesson Came Up Again and Again Professional after professional said this is what they wished they had understood when they were young.

"Always remember, your focus determines your reality" - George Lucas

Are you thinking about making a change? 🤔

It could be something BIG like changing jobs or something small like taking up a new hobby. 🎨🧘🏽‍♀️💃🏽

Change can be scary 😓 and can make us feel alone and exposed.

I often work with clients around change because the world is ever-changing. What I’ve noticed is that there are a few common thoughts that stop people in their tracks when it comes to actioning change with one of the main culprits being:

💭“What will other people think?”💭

It’s a biggy I know – the fear of being judged.😨 That totally uncontrollable and unpredictable dark horse. 🐎

We are social creatures so it’s natural to have this fear. We like to be accepted. Hell, as cavemen and cavewomen we probably relied on being accepted in order to survive (safety in numbers)!

We are hard-wired to want to belong. 🥰

The thing is that we don’t have control over other peoples’ thoughts or actions no matter how hard we try to manage them. We can (and usually do) however make assumptions about what their thoughts/reactions will be.

We spend hours and hours (…and hours⏳) running through how they may act and how we can respond – oh the infinite options! Spending so much precious time and energy trying to control the uncontrollable.

So, what do we have control over?

Two things:

💫Our own thoughts

💫How we react

By focusing on managing these controllables we can ensure that our time and energy is being invested in taking action and moving forward, rather than addressing millions of hypothetical futures which will most likely not materialise.

🔍Focus on you, your thoughts and your actions. Staying true to yourself.

💪🏽Confidence is staying true to yourself and knowing why you are taking action.

Why don’t we all dress up like princesses and princes?👸🏽🤴🏽

I remember my sister telling me about when she and her partner got dressed up for a fancy dress party and ended up being the only adults dressed up! 🤔

Let’s start at the beginning...

My sister was super excited when she received an invitation 💌to a friend’s child’s birthday party! She hadn’t been expecting an invite as she doesn’t have kids so was very flattered when they cracked the nod. The day of the party came, and they excitedly re-read the invite just to check they had everything sorted.

Oh shoot - It was a dress-up party! 🥸👩🏽‍🍳👩🏽‍🏫👩🏽‍🌾👩🏽‍🔧👩🏽‍🔬👩🏽‍🎨👩🏽‍✈️👩🏽‍🚀

Frantically they whipped up an outfit each being as creative as possible with what they had. A few hours later a stunning looking princess and prince headed off to the party feeling more excited than ever! 🤩

So proud of their quick thinking and creative outfits having laughed together as they had hobbled them together in the nick of time.

With huge excitement, they burst into the party standing tall in full princess/prince character. Within seconds they realised something wasn’t quite right. As they peered around the party, they realised they were the only people over 5 years old who were dressed up…

Oh, the dress-up was just meant for the kids… ah…🤦🏽‍♀️😕🙃😝

In a split second my sister decided this was one of those moments that you just have to own... and with her best princess smile stepped confidently into the sea of confused looking parents😕 and absolutely delighted kids🤩.

She chuckled 😆 as she told me the story and I laughed as I imagined it all play out. If there was anyone who could pull off being a princess, it would be her.

Years later this story popped into my mind, and I thought:

🤔When did we decide that as adults we aren’t allowed to dream, dress up and have fun?

🤔At what point did we decide to judge others for their dreams, dressing up and having fun?

🤔When do we stop playing and start taking ourselves so seriously?

I challenge you to do something ‘childish’ this week.

Laugh till your tummy hurts or let your creative juices flow. Take a boring everyday moment and spice it up. Be silly.

💃🏽Dance proudly

✏️Draw badly

👩🏽‍🎤Sign loudly

🎨Paint abstractly

📖Read aloud using differing voices and with hand actions

😜Pull funny faces

🥸Wear something ‘ridiculous’

Let your self-judgement fade away. Experience the moment. Do it to have fun. Do it for the pure joy of it. Do it to feel like a kid again – not a worry in the world.

“Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence.” – Helen Keller

“I’m exhausted 😴😫 but I have to push through. It’s busy season. It’s what is expected of me and I don’t want to let the team down.”

At this time of year, I hear this (or something similar) all the time from clients, friends, and (back in the day) colleagues. Yes, this time of year is busy as everyone is knee-deep in yearend financial reporting, tax returns or 2022 projects but that does not mean that you have to run yourself into the ground. 🙅🏽‍♀️

If you find yourself pushing too hard, take a moment and remember…

🔋Rest is a critical part of the process of success. You can’t drive a car on an empty tank.

🔋The expectation is that you complete the work assigned not that you sit at your desk 24/7. You know how you work best, and it does not matter what other people are doing. If you know you need a break take one. If you feel overwhelmed by the work allocated to you, it is ok to speak up and ask for help. Even if it is to gain clarity about what to prioritise.

🔋Stop. Breathe. And intentionally recharge (even if it is for 2 minutes). Call a friend or loved one, get out of the office and grab a coffee, sit outside in fresh air, dance to your favourite song or listen to a comedy clip. Whatever gives you a few moments to relax. Then get back at it!

🔋It is irresponsible to push through when your body and mind are telling you to stop. You will support your team best by taking time to rest, so you are bringing your A-game.

🔋Just because you can’t see others struggling does not mean that they aren’t or that you are alone. You trust your team to tell you when they are battling so you can help and support them. Realise that they expect you to do the same.

Life is a marathon🏃🏽‍♀️, and this is a small sprint. Make sure you are focused on the long run, not just the here and now. 🏆

I'm a huge fan of the C word... and why you may want to be too.

It's a Thursday Throwback.... on a Friday! Enjoy.🙃

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