Relax with Jo

What to do when a child is having a panic attack ⬇️

When a child is having a panic attack, they don’t need to be told to “calm down.” They need to know they are safe, believed and not alone.

Stay close. Speak softly. Keep your words simple: “This feels scary, but I’m here with you.” Help them notice the room around them—five things they can see, four things they can feel. If breathing helps, gently encourage slow breaths, but never force it.

Lower the noise, the lights and the pressure. Don’t rush them to explain. Don’t dismiss what they feel. A panic attack can be overwhelming, even when it isn’t dangerous—and calm support from an adult can make all the difference.

Afterwards, listen without judgement. Ask what helped. Make a plan together for next time. And if symptoms are severe, unusual, or you are unsure what is happening, seek medical advice or emergency help.

Every child deserves someone who says: “You’re not in trouble. You’re not alone. We’ll get through this together.”

FREE HELPING A CHILD DURING A PANIC ATTACK: PRINTABLE STEPS

LIKE the photo and comment "PANIC" and we will send you a message with a link to a free PDF of this resource.

Free PDF 🎁 for you to share with your child.

A poster with 9 things to do when worries feel too big.
Follow Anxiety Tools and Resources post below ⬇️

LIKE the photo and comment "THINGS" and we will send you a message with a link to a free PDF of this resource.

FREE 9 THINGS TO DO WHEN WORRIES FEEL TOO BIG POSTER

Big worries can feel overwhelming for children, especially when they don’t know what to do next. This colourful “9 Things to Do When Worries Feel Too Big” poster offers simple, child-friendly steps to help them pause, breathe, check the facts, talk to someone trusted and take one small helpful action.

Ideal for homes, classrooms, counselling sessions and calm-down spaces, it supports primary-aged children and younger teens with anxiety, emotional regulation and worry management—reminding them that feelings can pass and they don’t have to face them alone.

Hello August
Chapter 8/12
Sunflowers 🌻 are calling 🌻📷

Happy Friday 😊
I took time to stop this morning and enjoyed the feeling that this beautiful corner in my garden gave me - I captured it so, come the depth of winter, I can remind myself how this photo made me feel.
Grateful, loved, peaceful, calm, thankful and lighter. Importantly, What’s to look forward to again. My chair is all ready there waiting for me after work 😂
When was the last time you looked at something or someone differently.
❤️ Summer

-health

We say it again and again again again.
When children are overwhelmed your connection will help them to regulate, They will begin to feel safe and calm again. Also true for adults if the situation requires it.
So, your co regulation is imperative to our whole nervous system becoming safe again.

When children are overwhelmed, angry or upset, they often can’t think clearly — which is why connection comes before correction.

This free printable poster gives parents, carers and professionals a simple, practical way to support behaviour: acknowledge the child’s feelings first, then guide them towards safer choices, clear boundaries and accountability.

With relatable examples like throwing toys or shouting at a sibling, it’s a helpful tool for positive parenting, emotional regulation, behaviour management and calmer family relationships. Perfect for homes, classrooms, therapy spaces, parenting programmes and support work with children and young people who experience big emotions or challenging behaviour.

FREE CONNECTION BEFORE CORRECTION: EXPLANATION POSTER FOR PARENTS

LIKE the photo and comment "CONNECT" and we will send you a message with a link to a free PDF of this resource.

The all singing, all dancing cranial nerve is 🚨🚨🚨finally getting its moment on a very good platform 🙌🧠👀👅👂👄🫁

I hope that some of my previous families over the years can relate to this information. It’s worth revisiting the topic if you feel it could help over the summer holidays as your child prepares for a new school year. Or maybe your feeling like your wanting to be more In your rest and digest mode too.

This was considered a bit woo woo when it was first introduced although totally fascinating. look how far we’ve come epically since Covid and so many children are still struggling with the Mental Heslth. Professor Stephen Porges, explains how the autonomic nervous system unconsciously scans environments for danger (called "neuroception"). It expands the traditional "fight-or-flight" and "rest-and-digest" model by dividing the parasympathetic nervous system into three hierarchical states that depend on perceived safety.

When we feel safe we are able to relax in our bodies enough to focus on what really matters. Just being our normal everyday selves or even trying to be the best version of ourselves.
Knowing that our brain will always want to protect us from the slightest hint of any perceived danger whether it’s True or false danger ‼️ it will still put your body into stress mode. Fuelled with a flood of Adrenaline we are Ready to react, respond and survive. But this can’t be good for us to spend most of our days triggered and in stress mode it will start to raise our blood pressure, which alone can have adverse affects of us.
ITS LIKE A SUPER HIGHWAY SENDING MESSAGES FROM YOU BRAIN TO YOUR BODY, via this long long nerve that runs into the every organ enabling functions to happen- the vagus nerve helps to regulates your heart beat- so if your anxious your heart rate increases then your blood gets pumped around quicker raising your blood pressure so you may become hot and flush you may breathe faster too this signalling that something is wrong. This can happen throughout the day for several factors. So knowing which vagus nerve exercise will help in this situation is a fantastic tool to have in your kit. 😊

Our Every day triggers

Our thoughts our feelings and our behaviour can play a huge part role in us sitting in stress mode most of the day. From thoughts of;
Not being good enough or I can’t do this, fear of losing, what if I get it wrong ?

Being hungry, thirsty & over tired or over stimulated with trigger you.

Feeling lonely or sad with no connection with people you like or love

Being in physical pain or anticipating pain
Dentist hospitals /

A poorly Family member

Grief

Exposure to old or new images on the telly or phone or even text that upsets us and makes us fearful 😧

Other peoples behaviours affecting our own

An injustice, rule beakers unfairness

Environmentally not safe

Where you go to school, work live,sleep, eat rest and play.

Could there be a fire 🔥 or a burglary am I in danger here ?

I don’t feel safe so I dont sleep well

It’s hot,cold, noisy, quiet, bright, not enough natural light not enough personal space/ invasion not enough natural daylight, sensory overloads.

Physical triggers

Physiological triggers

Held trauma

Unresolved trauma

The list goes on and on.

So being able to recognise when it’s a real fear vrs a false one that you have no control over, the Vagus nerve comes into play a lot here when activated by getting us out of that stress mode and into our rest and digest mode. The more we practising shifting across the quicker it responds too. This getting back to rest and digest asap.

This is known as as the Polyvagual theory 👏

It’s the most incredible nerve in our system. It’s fascinating 😂

Many of us have been trying to educate young ones and their parents about this for too many years now.

I can help to educate your child or yourself as a parent or caregiver.
It’s amazingly quick to learn and can be activated and strengthened in fun and easy ways. A new habit will only take 28 days to be consolidated so,
as a Child Well Being coach, I have oodles of knowledge and strategies to share with you, it will help you bring some calm back into your body, mind and your life.

Having good Vagual tone is the new way to decrease levels of internal stress which can as we know get triggered by anything we deem to spike us.

Take the Vagus Nerve Health Assessment When your body slips into constant “fight-or-flight” mode, you may notice an avalanche of symptoms—ranging from lingering fatigue and…

Connection not correction

5 phrases to try when a child can’t express why they are struggling.

This is good!

From GoZen: Anxiety Relief for Children

My child can’t self-regulate when big feelings come.

They can’t do this by themselves.

Adults struggle in the moment too, but we do have a little more awareness and life experience to stop, take a breath, and try not to overreact, but instead respond in a calm way.

Your child needs you to stay as calm as possible, even when you’re steaming mad. Take a walking breath and move away from them just until you feel back in control of your own words, reactions, and responses.

Remember to take a few deep, slow belly breaths, or practise box breathing for a couple of minutes. Tell your child you’ll be with them as soon as possible; you just need to take a deep breath so you can help them calm down.

Try to reconnect with them from a place of safety, love, calmness, and non-threatening support. Validate the feelings they are experiencing in that moment. Name the feelings. Offer to help them, hold them, or simply listen to them.

Try not to shame them with phrases such as, “You’re not listening,” or “When you stop crying, we can talk,” often said in a harsh tone. The truth is, they can’t listen right now. That part of their brain is currently switched off.

Rational thinking is out the window. The emotional brain is in full control.

A meltdown that is handled slowly and calmly will help the emotions subside more quickly than if you yell, “I will talk to you when you stop shouting or crying.”

That’s disconnection, not connection.

Stay quiet, stay calm, and use a neutral tone of voice. Offer nothing more than your presence during the peak of a meltdown.

Don’t try to teach in this moment—it’s just white noise to anyone in that state.

Self-regulation takes time to return. With your guidance, understanding, and calm presence, you can strengthen your bond with your child during these difficult moments. Bring peace, stay curious about their feelings, and help them name the emotions they are experiencing. This can help them understand what is happening internally, both mentally and physically.

This illustration helps show what is happening in a child’s brain during a meltdown.

Jolly July joins us

Chapter 7/12

SCHOOL SUMMER HOLIDAYS are on the horizon now. If you would like me to support your child with their ongoing or current anxieties or to support their emotional development, all in the comfort of your own home, Please get in touch for a free brief discovery chat.
I may be able to help your child find their inner self confidence and self worth, or another emotional
Support strategy is needed.
I just may be able to help you both. Parental guidance is also something I can offer alongside your child’s support classes.

I’m working through the summer holidays so don’t hesitate to contact me. I can run a block of classes based on 1-2-2 or I can offer small friendship group classes.
Primary aged children through to teenagers are welcome.