Relax with Jo

28/09/2026

“Calm down “

A child who is shouting, crying, hiding, freezing, refusing or lashing out is not always “being difficult”.

Sometimes their body has gone into alarm mode.

When a child feels overwhelmed, scared or under pressure, they may not be able to listen, explain themselves, remember what you’ve said or make a good choice in that moment. Telling them to “calm down” can be like asking someone to read while a fire alarm is blaring.

Calm comes first.

Try lowering your voice. Use fewer words. Give them space if they need it, or stay close if that helps them feel safe. Keep the boundary, especially around unsafe behaviour, but save the lecture and problem-solving for later.

You are not giving in by helping a child regulate. You are teaching them what calm feels like, one hard moment at a time.

FREE CHILD CALM DOWN CO-REGULATION POSTER FOR OVERWHELM

LIKE the photo and comment "CALM" and we will send you a message with a link to a free PDF of this resource.

27/09/2026

It’s not that simple !

Some learning and developmental differences can overlap, which is why it is not always obvious what is sitting behind a child’s difficulties.

Dyslexia, dysgraphia, dyscalculia and dyspraxia can all affect learning, but in different ways.

A child might struggle to read fluently but explain something brilliantly aloud.
They might understand exactly what they want to write, yet find getting those ideas onto paper exhausting.
They might cope well in many subjects but become completely overwhelmed by number concepts.
Or they may need far more effort to plan, coordinate and sequence physical actions.

And, importantly, children can have more than one of these differences.

We need to look beyond one individual sign and notice the pattern, intensity and impact across everyday life and learning.

The more accurately we understand where the difficulty lies, the better we can support the child rather than simply assuming they are not trying hard enough.

Understanding the difference helps us understand the child.

16/09/2026

Help yourself ❤️🫁😮‍💨🫁😮‍💨🫁😮‍💨🫁😮‍💨

I've taken many CPR classes over the years, but I was never told this...
When you're alone and have a heart attack. What are you gonna do then?
A very good post that can't be shared enough:

1. Take a 2-minute break and read this:
Let's just say it's 5:25 pm and you're driving home after an unusually hard day's work.

2. You are very tired and frustrated.
All of a sudden your chest hurts. They are starting to radiate to the arm and jaw. It feels like you're being stabbed right in the chest and heart. You're a few miles from the hospital or nearest home.

3. Unfortunately, you don't know if you can do it.

4. You may have taken CPR training, but the person running the course hasn't told you how to help yourself.

5. How do you survive a heart attack when you're alone when it happens? A person who feels weak and whose heart beats fast has only about 10 seconds before losing consciousness.

6. But you can help yourself by coughing repeatedly and really hard! DEEP breaths BEFORE each COUGH.
Coughing should repeat every second until you get to the hospital or until your heart starts beating normally.

7. Deep breathing gives oxygen to your lungs and cough movements increase your heart and blood circulation. Heart pressure also helps to restore a normal heartbeat. Here's how victims of cardiac arrest can get to the hospital for proper treatment

8. Cardiologists say if someone receives this message and passes it on to 10 people, we can expect to save at least one life.

9. FOR WOMEN: You should know that women have additional and different symptoms. They rarely have chest pain or arm pain.
You also feel indigestion and tension in the back of the bra line plus sudden fatigue.
Instead of posting jokes, today we are perhaps helping save lives by spreading this message.

❤️ COPY (hold your finger, click on the text and select copy, go to your own page and where you usually want to write, select your finger again and paste).

12/09/2026

Is it bad behaviour ? Signs of After School Restraint collapse. 👇

After-school restraint collapse can be confusing for families because the child who has seemingly “managed” all day can unravel the moment they reach safety.

They may become tearful, irritable, withdrawn, exhausted or overwhelmed by the smallest request. For some children, the journey home is enough for everything they have been holding in to begin spilling out.

This is not simply “bad behaviour”. It can be a sign that a child has spent enormous energy coping, masking, meeting demands and keeping themselves together throughout the school day.

The behaviour we see afterwards is often the overflow.

Understanding what sits underneath that collapse helps us respond with less judgement and more support.

Save this post for reference.

06/09/2026

“They always do that !” Do you know what’s behind THAT.

OCD in children does not always look like handwashing or a need for things to be tidy.

It can look like asking the same question again and again because they need to feel certain. Checking a door, a school bag or homework repeatedly. Taking a long time to get dressed, leave the house or settle at bedtime because something has to feel “just right”.

Some children are carrying frightening thoughts they do not want and do not understand. They may worry they will cause harm, make a terrible mistake, or that something bad will happen if they do not complete a ritual. These thoughts can feel very real and very scary.

Reassurance, checking and repeating can bring a short moment of relief. Then the worry comes back, often stronger. This is not attention-seeking or bad behaviour. It is a child trying to cope with intense anxiety.

A calm response can make a difference. Listen without judgement. Avoid shaming them for their thoughts. Let them know that unwanted thoughts do not mean they want them to happen, and that support is available.

FREE OCD IN CHILDREN: SIGNS, THOUGHTS AND COMPULSIONS

LIKE the photo and comment "OCD" and we will send you a message with a link to a free PDF of this resource.

03/09/2026

There’s more going on !

Sometimes the thing that tips a child over can seem so small.

Shoes on.
Turn the screen off.
Time to leave.
A sibling says the wrong thing.

And we can find ourselves thinking, “Why has THAT caused such a big reaction?”

But that moment may only be the final drop.
They may have already been carrying sensory overload, tiredness, anxiety, demands, frustration, hunger or a need for connection. By the time we see the behaviour, their capacity may already be stretched to its limit.

Instead of focusing only on the final trigger, get curious about what has been filling their cup.
Because when we understand what led to the behaviour, we have a much better chance of knowing what they need from us.

And sometimes, the most helpful response isn't another consequence or another demand. It's helping to reduce the load.

ParentingSupport SensoryOverload

01/09/2026

”You’re be fine ! “

Might not be enough in the moment…

Validate how they feel in the moment.

Unsafe,Afraid, lonely, panicked , overwhelmed, heightened anxiety and maybe display low self belief.
Give them something that they can relate to when you tell them” it’s ok “. Do you know what strategy to use to get help them to get calmer and cope ?
Did you prep for these moments ?
Did you practise some scripts together ?
Saying Affirmations ?
Allowing the child to acknowledge and move towards accepting a change is on the horizon, separation, with gentle guidance and consistent support will help them to manage their feelings.

When a child is struggling with separation anxiety, the words we use really do matter.

It can be tempting to reassure with phrases like “you’re fine” or “there’s nothing to worry about” — but when a child’s nervous system is already telling them that separation feels unsafe, those words can leave them feeling even less understood.

Instead, we can acknowledge that it feels hard without reinforcing the fear, offer calm reassurance, and make what happens next as predictable as possible.

Small changes in language won’t make separation anxiety disappear overnight, but they can help a child feel safer, more understood and more able to cope with the goodbye.

📌 See my post yesterday for details of how to obtain my free Bitesize Guide to Separation Anxiety.

01/09/2026

Hello September 🌻🌞summers last hug of warmth.
Enjoy 🌻🎉🌞
Chapter 9/12

29/08/2026

Calm down wheel 🧠☹️freebie.
Get your own copy to share with your Child- click through to the main page for the download.
www.SocialWorkersToolbox.com

24/08/2026

Can’t handle not winning !