Art of Transformation - Health, Life, and Grief Coaching

L, I received your message, but cannot respond. Can you please message your phone number to me?

There is so much collective sadness. In the world. In our country. In our province. And in the beautiful town of Tumbler Ridge. It is heartbreaking to hear of the innocent children, adults, and thei families who have had their lives so needlessly and tragically ended and impacted. 😭❤️ I know that life will never be the same again for the survivors, families, and the TR community.

There are many questions. Many speculations. Many rumours. There is hurt, anger, confusion, and incredible sadness. I think these are all valid ways of feeling. But please don't stay there. Please use that energy to keep this from happening again elsewhere. That may look like lobbying to prevent guns and weapons from falling into the wrong hands. It may look like pleading for better mental health supports. It may look like becoming more involved in your community. It may look like being someone that is empathic, compassionate, and inviting when someone needs to talk.

And I ask you to listen ❤️ No one just wakes up one morning deciding to harm themself or others. I imagine that it stems from a deep deep hurt or sadness. Please, check in on others. Care for others Let them talk when they need to. And LISTEN with an open mind! ❤️

If you need to talk, I am available for grief coaching. https://www.artoftransformationcoaching.ca/contact-art-of-transformation

Stenberg Wellness Centre also offers FREE online counselling services for whomever needs it. https://stenbergcollege.com/stenberg-wellness-centre/

Please reach out if you need to.

Contact Art of Transformation Contact Art of Transformation

Due to a scheduling conflict, this week's Grief Cafe will be held TONIGHT, Tuesday November 11th (Remembrance Day).

Clayton's Funeral Directors
7:00-9:00pm
Doors open at 6:30pm

Can you relate?

Some women don’t get to live soft lives.
They get handed chaos, grief, betrayal, heartbreak, and responsibilities that were never meant for one person to carry. They are forced to grow up faster than they should, to become strong when all they ever wanted was to be held, and to smile when the weight of the world is crushing their spirit. These women learn how to bloom in the dark — to find light in places where others only see shadows.

They become the kind of women who know how to carry others when their world falls apart because they remember exactly how it felt when no one showed up for them. They know how to hold space for someone else’s pain while still healing from their own. They’ve learned to turn their wounds into wisdom, their silence into power, and their pain into purpose.

They’re the ones who pour love into others even when they are running on empty. The ones who can look at someone else’s brokenness and see beauty instead of judgment. They love deeply because they know how it feels to go without love. They listen patiently because they know the sting of being ignored. They fight for others because no one fought for them.

These women are not hard because they want to be — they’re hard because life demanded it. They are proof that strength can coexist with softness, that resilience can live inside a tender heart. They are the quiet storms that never stop moving forward, even when their souls are tired.

They’re not here because it was easy. They’re here because they didn’t give up — because every time life tried to break them, they rebuilt themselves stronger, wiser, and more determined to keep going. And that’s what makes them truly powerful.

Due to a family event, there will be no Grief Cafe meeting tonight. We will meet again next week, October 29th, at Clayton's Funeral Directors

Forget the myth that your brain slows after 40 — new neuroscience research suggests that human intelligence, memory, and reasoning actually peak between ages 55 and 60.
Using large-scale cognitive data and brain imaging, scientists found that older adults often outperform younger ones in pattern recognition, decision-making, and emotional stability. This “late-life cognitive bloom” is attributed to decades of neural connections and life experience that strengthen the brain’s executive networks.
Rather than fading with age, the brain seems to optimize itself for wisdom, empathy, and strategic thinking — a hopeful reminder that mental power evolves rather than declines. The study reshapes how society views aging: not as a loss of ability, but as the age of mastery.

Kindness and caring, always ❤️

I didn’t know this would be my mom’s very last outing. Her last car ride. Her last time feeling sunshine. The last time she’d hand out treats to strangers … just to make them smile. But on some level, I think I did know. That’s why I choked up the instant I saw her that morning. That’s why I had tears in my eyes as I buckled her seatbelt. That’s why I rearranged my whole life to care for her in those final years … because I knew time was running out. My mom’s name was Gayle. Everything about her was larger than life: her achievements, her clothes, her emotions, her work, her stories, and her generosity. For decades, she delivered muffins to postal workers, peanuts to squirrels, cookies to Costco employees—usually while wearing head-to-toe tie-dye and a giant feathered hat. It was her weird and wonderful way of loving the world. She was fierce. But that day, she was fragile. Broken arm. Alzheimer’s. Tremendous pain. And still, she insisted on packing treats for the nurses before her x-rays. We did it together. I helped her put on one of her trademark fuzzy hats, as she told me which treats and how many of each to tuck into her Trader Joe’s bag. She could barely stand, but she was still giving. My whole life I watched people judge her for being too much. She was too strange, too intense, too different. And sometimes, I judged her too. (It’s hard not to be embarrassed when you’re 13 and your mom looks like a psychedelic superhero 😂) But in those last days, I finally saw her clearly. Her intensity and generosity weren’t just chaos. They were courage. She showed me how beautiful it is to let her full, wild, brilliant, aggressively kind self to be seen every single day, right up to the end. That’s why I built Planet Gayle. Because I believe there’s a little Gayle in all of us. A little part that feels a bit too weird, too soft, too much, too different. I watched my mom let that part of her run wild and free, changing countless hearts and minds in the process (my own included) And maybe that’s the whole point. Maybe … that’s exactly what we’re all here to do. #griefjourney #feelgood #wholesome

It hits like a wave you didn’t see coming.

Losing a pet can shatter routines and quiet the house in a way that feels unreal. You still listen for the paws on the floor. You still look to the door. Your body remembers before your mind does.

For many people, this grief is not “just a pet” grief. Studies show it can be as strong as losing a human loved one. The bond is real. The love is real. So the pain is real too.

Some people feel guilt or second guessing. Others feel numb. Sleep and appetite can change. That doesn’t mean you’re weak. It means your heart is doing the hard work of love.

It also helps to name what’s happening. Therapists call it disenfranchised grief - pain that the world doesn’t always recognize. But your loss is valid. You’re allowed to mourn.

What can help? Tell your story to someone safe. Make a small ritual. Keep a photo where you can see it. If it feels stuck or heavy, reach out for support. There is no set timeline. You loved them in your own way, and you’ll heal in your own way too.

References
Grief severity: A comparison between human and companion animal death - Death Studies, Taylor & Francis
Bereavement following death of a pet - British Journal of Psychology, Wiley
Does the DSM-5 grief disorder apply to owners of deceased pets? A psychometric study of impairment during pet loss - Psychiatry Research, Elsevier
“We Lost a Member of the Family”: Predictors of the Grief Intensity Following the Loss of a Pet - Human-Animal Interactions, CABI Digital Library

Disclaimer: Images are generated using AI for illustration purposes only.