Beyond Weight with Rachel Fox

My beautiful and incredibly talented friend Renee Matiushyk-Stribbell has been diligently working behind the scenes on a new project, and it's just launched!

After over 20 years in the mortgage industry, and now also a business coach, she recognised a gap when it came to hiring and recruitment, so she created Alignra - a platform designed specifically for Canada's mortgage industry.

As someone who knows firsthand how much work goes into bringing an idea to life, I know this has been a huge undertaking, and I'm so proud of her for making it happen.

If you're in the mortgage industry, please take a look. And if you know someone who is, I'd love it if you'd share this post and help spread the word.

https://www.canadianmortgagetrends.com/2026/06/new-hiring-platform-aims-to-fill-recruiting-gap-in-canadas-mortgage-industry/

Congratulations Renee, I'm so proud of you! ❤️

New hiring platform aims to fill recruiting gap in Canada’s mortgage industry - CMT News Alignra founder says the industry-specific platform is designed to help brokerages, networks and lenders create better job postings, screen candidates and recruit talent more intentionally.

There are days when the smallest thing can feel like too much.
A text message, or the tone of someone's voice. Someone asking you to do something.

And suddenly you feel overwhelmed, reactive and emotional...or you find yourself reaching for food without even thinking about it.

You might think to yourself - What is wrong with me? But nothing is “wrong” with you. Your nervous system simply has less available capacity in that moment.

We all have a window of tolerance - where we can cope, process emotions, think clearly and respond to life without tipping into overwhelm or shutdown.

But this window isn't fixed.
It narrows when your system has been carrying too much for too long.

Poor sleep, stress, masking, ADHD overwhelm, constantly people pleasing, responsibility without enough recovery, these can all reduce your window of tolerance.

Over time, your nervous system has less room left before something pushes it beyond what it can manage.

And we think its because we lack willpower, but food can become comfort, grounding, stimulation, or relief - or a way to soften the intensity of whatever it is you're feeling. And it typically happens unconsciously.

Which means the same situation that felt manageable three days ago can suddenly feel unbearable today.

This is why understanding ourselves matters so much. So instead of asking: “Why am I reacting like this?" Perhaps ask: “What has my system been carrying lately?”

That question often leads to much more understanding, awareness and self-support than trying to avoid feelings of shame.

And the best thing is, your nervous system can recover. Your window of capacity can strengthen. Through understanding, nourishment, emotional work and support, your tolerance can return ❤️

There are women going to work every day, likely earning a good living, appearing capable and functioning highly, while quietly carrying utter misery around food and their body.

Women who tell themselves they “just need to lose the weight for good.”
Women who spend all day masking, pushing, coping, performing and holding it together.

The sandwich lady arrives at work and something starts internally. Quietly.

The negotiation. The self-monitoring. A swirl of conscious and unconscious thoughts.

Should I? Shouldn’t I? I’ve already eaten. I’ll be good tomorrow. I deserve it. I have no control.

Why am I like this?

Then she gets home exhausted from holding herself together all day and sits down with half a packet of cookies because she’s starving, emotionally wiped and too overwhelmed to even think about what’s for dinner, let alone cook it.

She only half recognises the internal overwhelm, because if she fully stopped and admitted how exhausted, disconnected and emotionally overwhelmed she really feels… she’s sexretly scared she might completely fall apart.

So she keeps pushing. Keeps functioning. Keeps masking. Keeps chasing the weight-loss goal in the name of “health,” while slowly disconnecting further from her body, mind and self.

And from the outside? Most people would never know.

There comes a point where it’s no longer really about weight.
Not because your body or your health doesn’t matter, but because you realise the real exhaustion is coming from constantly managing yourself.

Managing food, hunger, cravings, thoughts and emotions.
Managing your body.
Managing whether you’re being “good” or “bad.”
Managing another restart.

Some women have spent decades living this way. I did.

Trying to feel in control, or trying to finally get it “right.”
And after a while, it even becomes less about wanting to lose weight and more about wanting peace.

Especially for women with ADHD, where food is often tangled up with comfort, stimulation, relief, grounding, reward, predictability, or simply something to look forward to when life feels overwhelming.

That doesn’t mean you’re weak or unaware. In fact, many women are deeply aware while it’s happening.

One part knows:
“I’m stressed.”
“I’m overwhelmed.”
“I’m looking for relief.”

While another part overrides it because the need to soothe, escape or regulate feels more urgent in that moment.

So many women feel stuck in this place, somewhere between dieting and freedom.

They no longer want rigid rules, obsession, tracking and self-punishment…but they also don’t yet trust themselves enough to feel fully at ease around food.

That middle place can feel incredibly confusing.

You know another diet isn’t the answer, but the chaos of completely letting go doesn’t feel good either.

The goal isn’t perfect eating, it’s learning how to live without constantly managing yourself around food.

To feel safe enough in your body and nervous system that food becomes just food again.

To nourish yourself without spiralling into control, shame or self-abandonment.

To have moments where food feels emotionally quiet, peaceful… maybe even a little boring.

And honestly, for many of the women I work with, that kind of peace would change their whole life.

It's not uncommon for a client to message me an hour or so before a session - planning on cancelling.

A few years ago, my client Julie did exactly that — "Sorry, something has come up and I don't think I'll make our session today."

I had a sense that this wasn't just logistics, that it was something she was finding hard to face.

So instead of simply rescheduling:

"Julie, we can absolutely reschedule. But first I want to ask, are we cancelling because you can't make it, or is it because there is something coming up that is difficult to face right now?"

Her response:

"I'll see you at midday 😅"

Sometimes the moment a client wants to step back is exactly the moment that needs to be heard.

When I say disordered eating work goes way beyond food this is what I'm relating to. Sometimes it's about feeling safe enough to show up — even when every part of you wants to hide.

If you are struggling under the surface, please don't hesitate to message me 🥰 I'll guarantee I've experienced something similar myself.

Instead of asking how can I lose weight, ask how can I meet my body's needs?

For my clients that is more than just what to eat and how to move. It's also addressing the emotional and mental aspects of your relationship with food, your body and yourself.

Most of us overeat at some point in our lives. We learned from infancy that if we feel bad, eating makes us feel better. This isn't wrong — it's human behaviour. Food literally helps us feel better.

The problem is, when we are told it's a weakness or a lack of willpower, we lean on it even more.

And we keep being driven back to this pattern:
FEEL BAD → EAT FOOD → FEEL BETTER

Think of a baby. They feel hungry, they eat, and they feel comfort, warmth, love and safety.

That's not a weakness, it's being human.

When we feel deeply heard, we do better. That's a large part of the work I do with clients. You get to feel heard — and it's in that comfort that healing begins.

I help women who struggle with disordered eating.

If this resonates, don't hesitate to message me.

Pride. Purpose.
That's what I felt when I received this message from a woman I had spent just one hour with.

She wasn't a client. It was a market research interview. I was simply asking questions and listening.

She wrote to tell me that she felt lighter afterwards. That some of the guilt and shame she carried every single day had shifted. Just from feeling heard.

I help women who struggle with disordered eating.

And moments like this remind me exactly why.

If something in this resonates, don't hesitate to message me.

Your brain is wired for reward.
And in today’s world, there’s no shortage of quick hits.

Scrolling, sugar, online shopping, avoiding things that feel hard… they all give you an instant lift. It makes complete sense that your system goes there, especially if your energy is low.

The problem is, those quick hits don’t last.

the more you rely on them, the harder it becomes to feel good doing the things that actually support you.

This is something I see in my clients with ADHD, and it’s not a lack of willpower, it’s a system that’s looking for the fastest way to feel better.

I spent years stuck in this cycle - until I started to understand what my body actually needed. And food was a massive step out of it.

Refined carbs and ultra-processed foods give you that quick lift, but they don’t give your body what it needs to create steady energy. So you end up back in the loop, reaching for another hit.

We're not at fault. Our bodies have learned that when lasting dopamine isn't available, the quickest fix will do.

We have been told to remove all the "bad foods", but what starts to change things is not taking everything away, it’s ADDING IN support.

Things that may take a little more from you, but give more back.

Macronutrients.
Getting outside.
Moving your body.
Meeting your body where it is.
Conversations that actually feel good. Doing the little things that feed your soul.

This is what builds a more steady kind of energy, lasting energy.

When your energy starts to stabilise, your choices naturally begin to change.

Not because you forced them, but because your system has something better to work with.

You don’t have to love everything about yourself right now..
but you do need to stop treating your body like it’s the enemy.

Before I had children, I was the one people came to.

I could show up for friends, I had a full calendar, and I still made sure I had time to be alone at home. That was how I recharged. My old work colleagues used to joke that you’d never get a day in Rachel’s diary because if she didn’t have three or four nights a week to herself, she couldn’t function.

And they weren’t wrong.

After I had my beautiful boys, that version of me started to fade, and in stepped a woman who was never fully “off.” I didn’t have that space anymore. I couldn’t be by myself in the same way, and I didn’t realise at the time just how much I needed that time to reset.

As time went on, I tried to balance being a mum and still being me, Rachel, the one I had always been. I followed my passions and the work felt meaningful, but over time I started to notice my energy never seemed to return. My moods felt unpredictable, and I didn’t feel like myself anymore.

It showed up in all the small, everyday ways at first. I’d walk into a room and have no idea why I was there, or I’d lose simple words mid sentence. I’d start things and not finish them, and tasks that used to feel easy suddenly felt overwhelming. Even the things I cared about became harder to focus on, and I found myself either constantly distracted or completely stuck. I also noticed I was snapping at my family over the smallest things, which just wasn’t like me.

At the time, I didn’t have the language for any of it. I just thought I needed to try harder, to push through and get on with things like I always had.
I felt so burned out.
My window of energy got smaller and smaller, and by mid afternoon I often had nothing left. I was completely exhausted, but then at night, when everyone was asleep and the house was quiet, I’d be wide awake, mind racing, going over everything.

Exhausted and wired at the same time.

Even as my boys got older and didn’t need me in the same way, that version of me with energy didn’t return.
I tried everything. Supplements, sleep, pushing through. My doctor kept prescribing antidepressants. Even exercise stopped working. And for a while, I started to believe maybe I was just lazy.

But what I discovered is that there are a number of things that can be going on underneath this, and most of us are never shown how they connect.
ADHD was a big part of it for me, but this isn’t just one issue. It can be a combination of ADHD burnout, nervous system dysregulation, blood sugar instability, chronic stress patterns and disrupted sleep.

When your system has been under strain for a long time, it becomes much harder for your body to regulate energy, mood, focus, and even rest. So you end up stuck in that cycle of feeling completely drained during the day, but unable to properly switch off at night.

And no amount of trying harder, or more coffee, fixes that.
What starts to change things is not adding more pressure. It’s understanding what your body is actually asking for and learning how to support your system.

For me, a big part of that was understanding the role food was playing. Not from a place of restriction, in fact the opposite, from a place of support. Adding in the things my body needed, rather than constantly taking things away like we’ve been told to.

I don’t follow a set diet, and I don’t give one to the women I work with either. I’ve spent years learning how to eat for my own body, my own energy, and my own moods, and that’s what I help others begin to understand for themselves.

That’s when things started to change for me. My energy became more stable, my moods softened, and so did the crashes. My system started to feel like it was working with me again.
If any of this feels familiar, you’re not alone. And it’s not just who you are now.

I’m putting something together that walks through this more simply, because it’s hard to explain properly in a post. If you’d like me to let you know when it’s ready, just say the word.