03/07/2021
Healing is a journey
It's not a one size fits all formula. It's raw. it's hard work.
Healing takes courage. It takes being fed up of the same ole.
I've been healing my entire life. It's a journey not a destination.
I have had some kick ass mentor and friends.
You have to be open to receiving.
You have to be open to turning yourself inside out. Even the yucky parts. Full exposure.
Release the guilt
Release the fear
Release the shame
Most of the things we carry around with us are just not ours to carry.
We carry them because we are told that we have to carry our burdens like some sort of badge of armour.
My childhood trauma is not mine to carry around my whole life but it is my responsibility to FULLY heal it.
Whatever that looks like, it is different for everyone.
Find a mentor, find a guide, find a resource, a therapist. Do what you need to do to become whole.
Believe you are worthy, my dear.
You will stumble, you will fall, you will fall some more.
There will be tears and lots of them as you peel back the layers and release the heaviness of your soul.
There will be days that will feel so heavy, you are not sure you have the strength to go on.
Then one day, you start to feel better almost like a rebirth. You tell yourself, I am not the things that happened to me. I am so much more than that.
Life starts to feel so calm, it creates this extreme sense of discomfort at first. You are so used to chaos.
You start to feel a peace you never knew could exist, a solitude.
You start to forgive the little girl inside who never knew better.
You start to forgive the adult girl who did.
You decide that you will no longer beat yourself over and over and you start to make sense of your life's choices.
Everything becomes clear.
You gain a sense of clarity and perspective you never knew possible.
You can never go back to that incredible sense of woundedness again for you are not broken.
You build a mosaic of all the pieces you've carried around and you create a masterpiece.
Is it perfect? never.
Is it better? YES.
Is it a work in progress? always.
You BECOME, who you've always been.
You lay down, the armour, the shield the protection as it is no longer necessary.
You no longer live in fear, for you are capable of handling whatever comes your way.
You are a fearless warrior, a woman, perfectly imperfect.
You are meant to fly.
He said, "you become, It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't often happen to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, be the time you are real, most of the hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are real you can't be ugly, except to people who do not understand"
The Velveteen Rabbit