05/06/2017
Every parent deals in a different way about the anxiety of letting your kid grow independently - here's an SVS parent talking about their experience... It's very rich, humble and honest.
"When I, as a concerned parent, become aware of the fact that there is open talk about things I conceive of as threatening, it can easily look to me as if a school is condoning whatever it is that people are talking about, such as drinking, smoking, and substance use. Or, thinking more particularly of our campus right now, candy, the smoking area, and computers. Does letting people buy candy mean we all think it’s healthy? Haven’t we heard about the dangers of smoking? How can we not restrict computer time?
As an SVS parent, you have very likely come up with answers to these questions yourself, and you know that it is not an easy task. At school, many interesting discussions and conversations come from exploring and negotiating difficult topics with each other. But just like with that doctor, I do find that in school–parent interactions, it is me and my own fears and anxieties as a parent that can make the much wanted and needed open communication about unnerving topics difficult if not altogether impossible. I don’t want to hear about how a school is dealing with substances because I don’t want there to be any substances other than food from the school owned farm, and milk from happy cows to begin with. Students, especially the somewhat fearless kind you meet at our school, are often very good at talking about challenging topics, but as a parent, I think I am just not an ideal partner for this conversation, because I’m already worried, and if something happens to my child, I’ll be inclined to find the school at fault, no matter what."
There was a Separation and Transition Workshop for parents at my son’s college orientation that I went to, and I don’t regret going, even though I thought I would.