01/10/2026
The "well-behaved" child in your classroom or clinic may be working harder than anyone realises.
Masking is hard to see, and a child who seems calm, compliant, or "coping fine" at school may be expending enormous energy to hold it together, only to unravel once they feel safe at home.
For clinicians and educators, this has real implications:
π Behavioural observations alone may not capture a child's true internal experience
π "High-functioning" presentations can mask significant distress or unmet need
π Building trust and psychological safety is essential before masking will reduce enough to see a fuller picture
At Secret Agent Society HQ, we encourage service providers to create spaces where children don't have to mask to participate β where differences are expected, respected, and worked with rather than around.
How do you factor masking into your assessments or classroom observations?
"But they're fine at school." π If you've heard this and then watched your child melt down when they get home, they could be masking.
Many neurodivergent kids learn, often without even realising it, to hold in their feelings, mimic peers, and push through discomfort just to get through the school day. It takes enormous effort, and it often shows in spaces where they finally feel safe enough to let their feelings out. π
At Secret Agent Society HQ, we encourage teachers and clinicians to create spaces that help kids feel safe to be who they are, not who they think they need to be to fit in.
Image description: A child with long brown hair sits cross-legged looking up attentively, near a tablet in a yellow case on a table. Another person sits behind them.