Yâel Clark, Developmental Psychologist

The countdown is doing its thing...way too quickly if you ask me!

CALLING ALL MENTAL HEALTH PROFESSIONALS!

This is YOUR event. This is the professional development you didn't know you needed.

Reflective practice
Lived experience
Emergent research
Collegial connections

Please help by clicking on LOAPAC-Neurodiversity Affirming Psychologists Australia 🙏🏼

My Mother's Day wishes this year go out to the mothers whose day is no different to any other day; to the mothers who don't get a break; to the mothers for whom parenting has turned out to be nothing like society set us up to expect.

I see you.
I am you.

I yearn for a society that, instead of setting us up to feel like failures or that our chilldren are "less than", rolled up its sleeves and pitched in.

Disability is normal.
Disability has always existed and will always exist.
Disability is part of the fabric of human diversity, strengthening it in ways you can't imagine.

But at the family level, in a society where families are isolated and expected to cope alone, disability can be so very hard.

Especially on a day when it *seems* that everyone else gets spoiled.

In a society where mothers were truly supported, we would get to enjoy today. We would get to recharge.

And then, the brain fog might lift and we would clearly see what blessings our children are. We would be able to be thankful that we became mothers and dedicated ourselves to our children.

That is the truth that lies under the false messaging that society gives us. Our children are not flawed and we have not failed at mothering.

Our children are exactly as they are meant to be and we are doing the best we can in a world that has foresaken collectivism and interdependence.

And so, to all mothers, I wish you support, appreciation, and respite. I wish you enough energy to see that you are doing a better job than you realise. You are worth celebrating. Today and every day, even if you only get to remember this for a few moments with a hot cuppa and a KitKat. Hopefully alone! Hopefully not locked in the bathroom!

Sending love.

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I bought this mug while in the Dandenongs for a work team building day. My now 36 year old was 14 and my team leader spotted this mug and encouraged me to buy it. I also bought one for my daughter. It did not reflect how I felt about her that particular day but here we are, having more-or-less survived those years and she still uses that mug when she's here. (photo in comments)

ASK: What is happening around them?

Thank you Reframing Autism!

💡 When we stop asking “Why are they behaving like that?”
and start asking “What’s happening around them?” - everything changes.

So much behaviour is a reaction to environment, not a deliberate choice or a personal failing. Sensory overload, pressure to perform, lack of safety, unmet needs - they shape our nervous systems long before conscious choice comes into play.

👐 Reframing behaviour in this way builds understanding - and understanding creates space for compassion, support, and real change.

When we change the environment, behaviour often follows.



[ID: Against a blue background, with the Reframing Autism logo at the top and the colourful knotwork in the lower right corner, white text reads, 'Understanding our behaviour as a reaction to our environment, rather than a choice that we consciously make, helps us to reframe our perception of that behaviour'. Beneath the text is an image of a young boy in a classroom who appears distressed, holding his pencil case aloft as the contents fall out in front of his teacher.]

Initiatives like the Sunflower Lanyard rely on community awareness and respect. This post by Transport for NSWis just wonderful.

I wear the lanyard at airports. I am a confident flyer but navigating the airport itself, especially border patrol, overwhelms me. My auditory processing difficulties also make it so hard to follow directions and instructions.

Usually I have found airport staff and cabin crew to be kind and helpful when they see the lanyard but my experience in Miami, Florida last year should be produced as a SNL skit!

Picture this:

Identical twin ground crew workers approached me as I disembarked (or deplaned as they call it). Beaming at me tenderly, they asked if they could get me a wheelchair.

Me: No, thank you. I don't require a chair.
Them in unison: But...the lanyard?
Me: smiling, Nope! I'm fine. This is not the sort of help I need.
Them: off to the side, whispering to each other loudly about disability and the sunflower and they know they *have* to do something to help!
Them: Ma'am, it is no trouble at all for us to get you a wheelchair. Just wait here. We take pride in doing our job right.
Me: Explained again. Thanked again. And then walked away so fast, they must surely have been convinced I did not need the wheelchair!

And yes, it was all the funnier because they essentially clones; the visual was strikingly comedic!)
(I say this as the mother of identical twins).

https://www.facebook.com/TransportForNSW/posts/pfbid0Ckn6gdzH4G6cAjmNtbeVo2p7ZebMzTNSw7EtornJxCZ1BYRcoJcChgJiyS9sK4Mdl?__cft__[0]

Ever spotted someone on public transport wearing this sunflower lanyard? 🌻

It indicates that this person has a hidden disability, helping staff to identify that they may need additional care and helping fellow passengers to show extra patience when needed 😌

It’s important to remember that not all disabilities are visible ❤️

Most of the things I’ve shared before are from the perspective of my daughter and our journey understanding autism. But this one made me pause in a different way.

As a parent who’s been digging deeper to understand and support my autistic child, posts like this help me momentarily see things through the lens of an autistic person.

I remember how I used to quickly tell people during gatherings that my daughter “doesn’t respond” when they tried talking to her because I don't want them to think that she's a snob or impolite (I'm that defensive lol). Now I realize it’s not that she doesn’t respond, she just communicates differently.

Even in conversations with Yael, there are times I hesitate to share how I perceive certain things about my daughter, thinking we might see it differently. But she always encourages me to share, and somehow she understands where I’m coming from while helping me learn something new. I’ve been grateful for that since day one.

Understanding is a process, and posts like this help me keep seeing things from a wider perspective.
- Jenny

Post from Yael on April, 2024

How would you feel if the way you naturally communicate and connect with others is taught as being rude and egocentric? How well would you communicate if you had to consciously and continually stifle your natural skills and use a social script?

Food for thought (and hopefully, action!).

Link to the full post: https://www.instagram.com/p/DVCRc23ETV5/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link&igsh=NTc4MTIwNjQ2YQ==

Post 3 of 3.

THIS'LL TEACH ME TO SCHEDULE AN UNFINISHED POST!

Thanks for liking the image but I will come back soon to add the text! (Got derailed this week by family stuff.)

Therapist to advocate.

Post 2 of 3.

Safety is how we create change. Without safety, change doesn’t happen. We know this as therapists and teachers alike: without relationship, there is no learning, no engagement, no depth where transformation can occur. We don’t force change—we create the fertile ground where it can grow.

The same is true for us as advocates. If we are too scared to speak because we might use an outdated term or forget to name every group, we become silent. And silence does not build movements. If we are held to impossible standards—especially those of us with limited capacity or executive functioning differences—fewer and fewer people will dare to step into the arena.

Surely relational safety is a fundamental value we hold as the type of human who goes into the healing professions. But it is easier to hold space for others in the therapy room; that is our role there. The dynamics with our colleagues are less clear, less structured. So when we become reactive, when we feel compelled to correct or criticise our colleagues, remember that a culture of respect between advocates is not optional; it is strategic. When we extend to one another the same affirmation, repair, and generosity we offer our clients, we create the conditions for collective courage. And collective courage is what makes us effective agents of change.

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This slide is from my presentation at NATCA and LOAPAC Expo '25.