11/03/2020
I consider myself an honest person.... maybe brutally honest some would say.
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But lately feeling more like a phony...hear me out. I share my life on this platform in order to empower other women to be their best self. To dig deep and push past their circumstances to show up for themselves in their own lives.
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But I have a hard time sharing the hard stuff. The ugly day to day stuff. The stuff that actually makes me human just like you. So I feel sort of like an .
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In December 2019 my youngest was diagnosed on the spectrum. They used to call it Aspergers but now it’s lumped into the spectrum. He has struggled his whole life in one way or another. Diagnosed in 1st grade with severe adhd and sensory issues. I would be lying if I didn’t say every single day is a struggle in some ways for him.... and the family. 😬😳 The worry and anxiety I feel everyday as he goes about life or navigates friendships, school, heck being outside! It’s a lot and if you have a child with any of these issues you get me!!
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But you know what else is hard?? Throwing in 2020!! Routines out the window, teenagers who don’t get to start high school, youth sports being cancelled, everyone feeling isolated and lonely. It’s just been a lot.
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So I sit here in tears feeling like a total failure. Like I’ve waited too long to seek more help for him, like I’ve dropped the ball on my teens, just all around sucking at this major job they call . I KNOW I’m not alone in this feeling and I also KNOW I’m a good mom, but I can be better.
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So today I sit and cry, but then I’ll pick myself back up off the floor and take another step because that’s what we do. Life’s hard and I’m nowhere near perfect. But I don’t give up and I’m way too freaking strong to let this stuff hold me back from showing up for my kids everyday as the strong mom they need.
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