Lizard People of Overlake

*In a Nicaraguan cathedral*
“Miguel, you’re walking on top of a door to a grave!”
“I was hoping to join them”

"I lick my eyeballs with my tongue so that I can cry easier while giving Journalism announcements."

“I use my hair to hide extra snacks in, like crickets and stuff."

"I don't murder people because I like killing, I murder people because I seek to understand the concept of death"

"I love performing because it's almost like putting on someone else's skin and walking around in it. And I know what that feels like from experience."

"Who was the first African American president of the United States?"
"Barack Obama?"
"False. Barack Obama is a lizard person."

"Sometimes when I fart and I'm by myself, I say 'safety' anyways because God is always watching"

"I wish Annie would pick up her extra lizard skin"
"I wish Taz would stop being so strict"
"I'm more of a mom than a sister"
"I really don't need two lizard moms"

"I hate rain, so I always try to imagine that rain is actually the tears of children. That makes me happy."

Lulu: "Everyone always asks us how we have such a great friendship but it's super easy"
Emily: "Every weekend we go to the mall and afterwards we sacrifice a goat to our lord of darkness, Lucifer"
Lulu: "Hail Satan"

"Now that the volleyball season is over, the biggest threat to Overlake is the rising number of lizard people"

"What are you thinking about, Mihir?"
"Your mother"