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By our 50s, we've audited almost everything. The subscriptions we forgot we were paying for. The standing meetings that ...
09/04/2026

By our 50s, we've audited almost everything. The subscriptions we forgot we were paying for. The standing meetings that could have been an email. The commitments that made sense five years ago and slowly hardened into obligations.

The one thing most of us never audit is our friendships.

We assume relationships are meant to be permanent, that ending one means somebody failed, and that loyalty means staying no matter how little is left in it. We keep showing up for connections organized around a person we no longer are. The job we left. The town we moved away from. The version of us who needed that particular friend at that particular moment.

The research keeps finding the same thing: the quality of your close relationships is one of the strongest predictors of how long and how well you live. The size of your contact list barely registers. A wide network of shallow ties does far less for you than a small circle of people who know the person you are today.

That raises an uncomfortable question. If quality is what does the work, what is a draining, obligation-only friendship actually giving you? The brutal answer is rarely nothing. Strained relationships have a measurable cost, and the hours you spend maintaining one out of guilt are hours you don't give to the people who actually feed you.

You don't have to become ruthless with people. The ask is intention: the same intention you already give everything else you protect, reciprocity, presence, and the sense that someone knows the human you've become.

Most of us can name the exact friendship this describes. We talk ourselves out of doing anything about it.

Keep reading. Link in comments ⬇️

Tonight's yoga class goes easy on the wrists. Sixty minutes of movement that keeps weight off your hands, so nothing get...
09/02/2026

Tonight's yoga class goes easy on the wrists. Sixty minutes of movement that keeps weight off your hands, so nothing gets pushed harder than it should. Your wrists do a lot of small work every day, and they're worth protecting for the years ahead.

Regulars, I'll see you there. Not a member? Not a problem - grab a one-time pass from the link in my bio.

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The September schedule is up!🧘‍♀️ Yoga holds Monday and Wednesday at 6:30p💪🏻 Strength Training runs Tuesday at 5:30p🏋🏻‍♀...
09/01/2026

The September schedule is up!

🧘‍♀️ Yoga holds Monday and Wednesday at 6:30p

💪🏻 Strength Training runs Tuesday at 5:30p

🏋🏻‍♀️ Thursday alternates Functional Strength and Bodypump Heavy, both at 5:30p

✨ Friday morning stays open with YouTube yoga at 8.

September is when everyone else's calendar takes over yours. Kids, work, the fall obligations that show up whether you agreed to them or not. Put your classes in first, and the rest has to fit around you for once.

Bring someone with you. A standing class with a friend is the plan you both keep, and you get the workout and the catch-up in one trip. It beats another fall where you meant to see each other and the months went by.

Specialty classes shift the pace:

✅ Bodypump Heavy (9/3 + 9/17): slow, controlled, strength-focused
✅ Functional Strength (9/10 + 9/24): full-body, real-world movement
✅ Restorative Yoga + Soundbath (9/14): slow your whole system down

Also subbing yoga at the Foothill Ranch 24 Hour Fitness:

📍 Fri 9/4 at 10:45
📍 Mon 9/28 at 10:45

Several more Foothill Ranch dates land in October, same 10:45 time.

Save the schedule. Pick your days. 📆

Text a friend the one she should come to.

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Tonight's class is simple movements done well. Nothing complicated to learn. The effort comes from how you hold each sha...
08/31/2026

Tonight's class is simple movements done well. Nothing complicated to learn. The effort comes from how you hold each shape, how intentionally you move, how honest you are about your range.

Sixty minutes that ask more of you than they look like they will. Regulars, I'll see you there. Not a member? Not a problem - grab a one time pass from the link in my bio.

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Not every loss comes with a funeral, and those are often the ones that stay with us longest.A parent slipping into demen...
08/28/2026

Not every loss comes with a funeral, and those are often the ones that stay with us longest.

A parent slipping into dementia is still sitting across the table, and the person you knew keeps getting harder to find. A long friendship thins out with no argument to explain it. A rift in the family goes unspoken for years. Nobody marks any of it, so we carry it without a name and without permission to call it what it is.

Two researchers gave these experiences language. Pauline Boss called the first kind ambiguous loss: someone present but psychologically gone, or gone but never accounted for, a loss with no closure built in. Kenneth Doka called the second disenfranchised grief: grief the culture doesn't count as valid, the kind you feel you're not entitled to feel.

Between them, they cover most of what people actually mourn in midlife. The parent who is here and vanishing. The friend who drifted past reach. The future you assumed you'd be living.

Naming a loss won't reverse it. What it does is loosen the private sense that you're grieving wrong, or too much, or over something that doesn't qualify. That shift is what makes it possible to hold the loss and keep living at the same time.

I wrote this week's piece for anyone carrying one of these unnamed losses and wondering why it won't sit still.

Keep reading. ⬇️ link in comments

You can change all the people and still end up in the same friction. Turns out the common thread is often US.New piece i...
08/21/2026

You can change all the people and still end up in the same friction. Turns out the common thread is often US.

New piece is up on what to actually do with that. Check it out. ⬇️
**Link in comments

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Tonight's yoga class is gentle. Slow pace, soft transitions, room to breathe. Some nights the body wants to move easy, a...
08/19/2026

Tonight's yoga class is gentle. Slow pace, soft transitions, room to breathe. Some nights the body wants to move easy, and that has real value. Rest and recovery keep you mobile over the long haul.

Sixty minutes to slow down and settle in. Regulars, I'll see you there. Not a member? Not a problem - grab a one time pass from the link in my bio.

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Balance and mobility tonight.We'll move slow through the joints, steadying as you shift your weight and reach through yo...
08/17/2026

Balance and mobility tonight.

We'll move slow through the joints, steadying as you shift your weight and reach through your range. This is the stuff that keeps you moving well.

Not a member? Not a problem - grab a one time pass from the link in my bio.

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The range of motion you lose after 50 goes so slowly you never notice, right up until the day you can't reach the top sh...
08/14/2026

The range of motion you lose after 50 goes so slowly you never notice, right up until the day you can't reach the top shelf.

Five simple mobility habits to keep it. Link in comments.

Power moves tonight.We're working with strength holds that build stability and control. Nothing rushed here. Steady stre...
08/12/2026

Power moves tonight.

We're working with strength holds that build stability and control. Nothing rushed here. Steady strength, the kind that keeps you moving well for years.

I'll see you on the mat.

Not a member? Not a problem - grab a one time pass from the link in my bio.

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