The EQ School

It's finally here!
The Wisdom of Feeling is out today!

If you are struggling to bridge the gap between where you are and where you'd like to be —

If you're someone who knows on a deep, intuitive level that you are a good person and know there must be better ways of navigating your own emotional difficulties and challenges —

If you struggle with accepting love an letting people really see you, but want to learn how to open up and let it in —

If you're starting to clearly see what you don't want to do, but are still trying to figure out what it means to live a connected, authentic, and emotionally attuned life in the face of modern challenges —

and if you're sick of feeling like drama follows you everywhere — the pattern really can stop with you!

And you can start with this book on how to meet yourself with greater compassion as you begin to improve your own emotional intelligence.

Thank you for all of your support — so excited to hear what you think!

https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/767885/the-wisdom-of-feeling-by-genny-rumancik/

Have you ever heard the expression, “new level, new devil?”

That’s what it means when you feel like you’ve gotten comfortable at your current stage of life, so you begin stepping into your next dream or goal and are met with insecurity, doubt, fear, and discomfort all over again.

It can feel really uncomfortable and even frustrating —
“I’ve already dealt with this!”
But with each new level of growth, comes new challenges.

New stretches. New things to learn, to develop a relationship with, and new boundaries to explore.

These feelings of discomfort and doubt don’t necessarily mean it’s not for you —
They might be a mirror showing you where you have some expansion work to do.
Can you let yourself be seen?
Can you let the light in?
Can you soften your guard and play in the present and just see what happens?

Give yourself time and support. You’ll get there.

And speaking of new levels — my first book, “The Wisdom of Feeling” comes out TOMORROW!!
Today’s the last day to pre-order and receive the bonus Grounded Self exercise

In a world filled with easy dopamine hits and instant gratification culture, we’re used to moving quickly.
In fact, it feels harder and harder to allow room for the space our hearts, brains, and nervous systems need to process life as we know it.

But many of the most important aspects of life and humanity — growth, love, connection, healing, and self-knowledge, to name a few – can not and do not happen quickly.

It takes time to first identify old patterns,
then to be present to their impact,
then to begin to insert different ways of responding,
then to sit with the discomfort of change,
then to continue to learn and grow and adapt and deepen.

It takes time to really get to know someone.
To share and open yourself to them. To have experiences together that teach us about ourselves and the other and deepen our connection. To bear witness to each other’s struggles. To foster safety, intimacy, and deep familiarity as we learn how to show up for each other.

It takes time to develop a skill.
To practice the basics, to make mistakes, to try it in new contexts, with new materials, to start to see more and more nuances as you change variables and increase your own familiarity with the process.

It takes time to heal, when our bodies are so used to bracing, resisting, shutting down, or acting out.
It takes time to soften into the present moment and trust ourselves, and then others.

And these things should take time. None of it can happen without the time it takes being present, being with what is here now and witnessing the impact.

Allow yourself to slow down. Allow your body to process change. Allow things to unfold instead of forcing them into being.
Time takes time.

It also took me two years to write this book — The Wisdom of Feeling and it comes out in just FIVE DAYS!

Pre-orders mean the world to new authors (that's me, I'm a new author! Your pre-orders mean the world to me!), and you've still got time!
And if you order by June 15th (Monday), you can receive my free Grounded Self Guide to use to help you slow - it - down and come back to yourself in hard moments or before making big decisions.

https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/767885/the-wisdom-of-feeling-by-genny-rumancik/

You can upload your receipt here to receive the Guide:

https://woobox.com/m4tzme

Friendships are as varied and different as the human beings that are in them. I know I have friendships that are pure silliness, some that are rooted in common interests, others based on our shared history, and, fortunately, I have a good chunk of friends who I connect with often and feel deeply seen and loved by in both my best and worst moments.

Friendship has been a huge part of my healing journey, as I learn to come back to myself, share more of my heart, communicate more effectively, and stretch in the places where I still feel lingering tightness. It's in friendship that I find a mirror to help me better understand what I value, need to work on, and what no longer works for me any more.

It's been in friendships with people whom I both feel safe around and admire deeply; the ones who make me want to be a better friend and who (often unknowingly) hold me to a higher standard; it's in these sorts of dynamics where the most deeply gratifying shifts toward maturity have happened for me.

Some of the biggest lessons around healthy boundaries have come from friends who set them lovingly; letting me know what they need and what works for them without additional strings or harsh energy attached. They've inspired and motivated me in the same direction, and created a safe environment in which to try.

As I continue to grow and find new edges, I've also found that many of my friendships have changed. Some have fallen away and new folks have stepped in. In others, I'm meeting old friends in newer and deeper ways and have been surprised to find more joy, safety, and honesty.

I'm feeling so incredibly grateful today for my friends.

What role has friendship played in your journey back to yourself?

Also, MY BOOK COMES OUT A WEEK FROM TODAY!!

If you're working on deepening your connection with yourself so you can open yourself to healthier, more reciprocal, fun, safe, connected and silly relationships — The Wisdom of Feeling is a wonderful place to start. Part 3 is all about learning to recognize what makes a community safe and healthy, and how to contribute!

https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/767885/the-wisdom-of-feeling-by-genny-rumancik/

Order by Monday June 15th and upload your receipt here to receive the free Grounded Self guide - to help you come back to yourself in hard moments.

https://woobox.com/m4tzme

You are allowed to have a voice.
You’re allowed to share your thoughts, stance, feelings, or preferences on things.
And - spoiler alert - people aren’t always going to like them.

People aren’t going to agree. They’re going to have their own reactions, their own feelings in response to what you’re putting out there.

And that’s okay.

Uncomfortable feelings don’t have to mean that anyone is wrong or bad or doesn’t belong. Uncomfortable feelings are often a great opportunity to dig a little deeper and get to know ourselves better.

One thing I’m working on is not offering a consolation option when I can see that someone doesn’t like my thought or opinion. I may have been known to share a limit, notice the other doesn’t like it and then quickly offer something else instead, to try appease their discomfort. I’m working on noticing the impulse and allowing it to pass.
It’s okay to not agree on everything.

It’s okay for discomfort to exist. For friction to hang in the air as someone processes a difference between the two of you.
When we allow ourselves to sit with and digest these moments of discomfort, we are allowing ourselves opportunities for growth, deeper connection, and greater emotional resilience.

Discomfort isn’t the enemy.
It's the path to a deeper, fuller, more authentic and connected life.

Y'all - my book comes out NEXT WEEK! I can't believe it's almost here!
Order "The Wisdom of Feeling" before June 15th and you'll receive access to my free guide for coming back to your grounded Self - it's great to use to help process these uncomfortable moments, or before making a big decision or stepping into the stretch zone.

Pre-order here:
https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/767885/the-wisdom-of-feeling-by-genny-rumancik/

Upload your receipt here to receive the free guide:
https://woobox.com/m4tzme

As the folks in our Cycle Breakers program like to say, Emotional self-management is self-awareness in action—
it's attuning to your body, your feelings, and becoming acquainted with your unique signals that let you know how you're feeling in any given moment.

It's recognizing when your energy dips, when you feel unsafe, when something is not okay with you.
It's also recognizing what makes you feel connected, calm, and like yourself and noting what conditions consistently make this possible.
It's, over time, trying different ways of responding to yourself and finding what works for you.

Throughout our entire lives we do this this through trial and error - we try things and see how they feel.
But to become more regulated, you have to be present with what is —
you have to learn how to attune to your body,
to slow down and notice when you're feeling reactive or shutting down without immediately having to fix, judge, understand, or change it.
Just being able to notice is a giant step toward creating more internal safety in your own body.

Because regulation isn't about a daily cold plunge or meditation practice, per se — it's about learning how to witness and response to yourself safely.
It's building the self-trust to use your discernment to know when to use what tool, or when to just let yourself move through something.
Because when we're present and we allow ourselves to the ride the waves of activation with safety and compassion, the wave will move through us.

If you're working on emotional regulation, my new book "The Wisdom of Feeling" comes out June 16th!
Deepen your self awareness, start practicing emotional self management skills, and become more attuned to the energy of your environment and how you contribute to a climate of emotional safety.

https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/767885/the-wisdom-of-feeling-by-genny-rumancik/

And remember, if you order before June 15th and upload your receipt at the link below, you can receive my guide for connecting to your grounded Self for free. Use it when you're feeling reactive, disconnected, or when you're about to make a big decision!

https://woobox.com/m4tzme

If you want to live a life dedicated to growth, connection, presence, and the acquisition of wisdom instead of things, these two facets are key.

First, you have to learn how to be present to your own feelings when navigating pain, hardship, discomfort, and the inevitable lows that are part of the human experience.

In learning how to stay present with your own experience, you can allow yourself to feel your feelings and process that experience. When we don't stay attuned to our own bodies and allow the pain to move through us, it stays stored within us a self-protective shield that keeps everything out — including the goodness, warmth, and depth of connection we need to grow.

It also keeps the pain inside, where the echoes of pain show up as shadows in the most important relationships and areas of life.

Learning to let pain move through you helps you learn the lessons and honor your experience without staying stuck.

Second, begin to embrace the idea that most things that happen to you aren't really about you.
Most of what other people do is about their fears, wounds, stress, limitations, assumptions, projections, and circumstances— not about you or your worth.

When you can really begin to internalize this, it's easier to meet difficult moments with curiosity instead of defensiveness, and to keep trying when one arena, relationship, or situation doesn't meet you where you need to be met.
Much of life isn't as personal as we think it is.

If you're working on these two things, my new book "The Wisdom of Feeling" comes out June 16th!
Deepen your self awareness, start practicing emotional self management skills, and become more attuned to the energy of your environment and how you contribute to a climate of emotional safety.

https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/767885/the-wisdom-of-feeling-by-genny-rumancik/

And remember, if you order before June 15th and upload your receipt at the link below, you can receive my guide for connecting to your grounded Self for free. Use it when you're feeling reactive, disconnected, or when you're about to make a big decision!

https://woobox.com/m4tzme

Seventeen years ago at a crowded airport, I watched a stranger do something I truly didn’t know was possible.

A woman was throwing a fit because some guy had unknowingly stepped in front of her when the last zone was called to board. When the guy realized what had happened, he apologized but she doubled down and called him, ‘Mr Big Shot.’

He paused, turned all the way around to face her, took a deep breath, and said,

“This feels important to you. Please — I’d like for you to go ahead of me.”

He wasn’t being sarcastic.
He wasn’t being passive aggressive.
He wasn’t shrinking, fawning, or people-pleasing.

He saw her frustration, clocked what had happened, and met her with mature, grounded kindness.

As she took in his energy, she instantly deflated, softened, and began apologizing.
A few moments later they were walking onto the plane, amicably chatting about holiday plans.

I was 23 and completely dumbfounded.
I just stood there thinking, “I want to know how to do that.”

Because at that point in my life, I would have either frozen up or angrily defended myself. Those were really the only two options I knew when faced with someone else’s aggressive energy.

That 90-second moment is where my new book, "The Wisdom of Feeling" begins.

I spent the years that followed that interaction in the airport learning what it actually takes to become emotionally mature — not to just act like 'an adult' in the way many of us have learned to mask, but to become so grounded in yourself that you’re not easily rocked by another adult’s temper tantrum.

This book grew out of those years, out of my own deep work, the lessons I learned along the way, and the wisdom I gathered through teaching emotional intelligence workshops over the years.

"The Wisdom of Feeling" comes out June 16.

And if you preorder before June 15, I have a free bonus for you: a downloadable Grounded Self guide + a 15-minute guided audio practice to help you reconnect with yourself before reacting, spiraling, or making a big decision.

✨ Preorder details + bonus ✨

If you'd like to preorder "The Wisdom of Feeling," you can find all retailer links here:

https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/767885/the-wisdom-of-feeling-by-genny-rumancik/

Already preordered? Upload your receipt here to receive the bonus:
https://woobox.com/m4tzme

You've been doing all this hard work. You can feel the changes in many areas of your life,
and then you back into an environment, maybe the one you're healing from, and it all comes rushing back.

You freeze up or find yourself instantly on edge or constantly on the defense.
And that makes sense — your body is going back to the old strategy that once worked in this environment.
It's not that the work isn't working,
it's more like you've moved from Koopa Troopas on to Big Bowser, and these interactions take a lot more of your resources.

And feeling those old familiar feelings or falling back into the old pattern doesn't mean you haven't grown.
It just means this is a particularly hard place and your body is doing the best it can to keep you safe.

But this is where the tools come in —
where you can practice self-attunement, noticing, allowing, self-soothing, and stepping away when you need to.
You are an adult and you get to choose how you respond.

Feeling triggered doesn't mean you're not making progress.
It gives you an opportunity to meet yourself in the midst of hard moments, to do the hard work of learning to stay present and actively taking care of yourself.

It's not easy, but it is possible, and I share many tools for helping you develop this skillset in my new book, "The Wisdom of Feeling," which comes out June 16th.

If you order by June 15th, you get a freebie! Upload your receipt and you'll receive a free guide (including a guided meditation) to help you slow down and connect with your grounded sense of Self.

Order your book from a retailer found here:
https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/767885/the-wisdom-of-feeling-by-genny-rumancik/

Upload your receipt here:
https://woobox.com/m4tzme

The repetitive thoughts that keep finding their way back to the forefront, even when you push them aside.
The nagging anxiety or ache of sadness in your tummy that you try to forget or distract yourself from —
they're trying to tell you something.

And trying to "control" them by forcing them away, thinking positive thoughts, or distracting yourself will only work temporarily — they'll be back or continue to change form until they get your attention.

Most of us have not learned how to be in relationship with our own activation and the signals that are letting us know we've got something inside that needs our attention.

But when you learn how to notice a repetitive or self-defeating thought, observe your own state, and get gently curious about what it might be telling you —
you start the process of self-attunement, meeting yourself with compassionate curiosity.

And from here we can slow down and learn ways to help our mind & body process feelings of activation together instead of avoiding them, becoming them, or battling against them until we're exhausted.

The folks in the Cycle Breakers program are learning to this, and you can too when you pre-order my debut book, "The Wisdom of Feeling," which comes out June 16th.

If you order by June 15th, upload your receipt and you'll receive a free guide to help you slow down and connect with your grounded sense of Self.

Order your book from a retailer found here:
https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/767885/the-wisdom-of-feeling-by-genny-rumancik/

Upload your receipt here:
https://woobox.com/m4tzme