Feel Fabulous By Fabiana

THANK YOU FOR ALL THE BIRTHDAY WISHES!! I JUST TURNED 53 YESTERDAY AND I COULDN’T BE HAPPIER TO BE GETTING OLDER!!

These 53 years of life brought me to a place where I learned how to truly appreciate who I am, my life and the numbers 5 and 3 don’t make a bit of a difference! Age is literally JUST A NUMBER.

I feel so comfortable in my own skin as I never felt before. I accept the signs of aging in a way that doesn’t bring me down into a spiral of “I need to look young”. I prefer to go after the “I want to continue FEELING young”. That is a much more realistic route and one that can take me places where I can truly love myself and embrace the process of aging with no sense of loss for what I once was, or looked like...

I miss fondly my tight skin and my unwrinkled face, the same way I miss fondly when I played with dolls and had sleepovers at my best friend’s house when I was 8. That doesn’t make me want to be 8 again… I miss fondly my teenage years, when I started to feel like my own person and independent. But that doesn’t make me want a teenager again… I miss my 30s when I became a mother. But that doesn’t make me want to be 30 again… and that’s how I see every age I go through. I appreciate who I once was, create fond memories where I have them and embrace the new age and what comes with it in a positive and accepting light.

Maybe that is what getting old means: keeping the good memories of who you once was and what you once had and enjoyed and work towards creating new good memories today for all the years to come.

It’s beautiful to be 53! It’s amazing to be alive, to be healthy, to love who I am, to embrace my weaknesses, but never giving up on working towards improving them. To have the awareness that I am the only one who has the ability to create my own happiness, and to be a conduit to the happiness of the ones around me, by inspiring them just by being who I am.

LADIES 50 AND OVER: you were fabulous when you were younger, and you are even MORE FABULOUS now, because you have all those experiences that gave you the wisdom to create even more beautiful memories! ❤️💃

AND IT’S ALWAYS A MATTER OR CHOICE! I CHOOSE TO FEEL FABULOUS AT 53!

Let’s all celebrate getting older with a positive and accepting attitude!

Who is with me on this mindset?!!

Happy mother’s day to all the moms out there! 💕
And a very special one to this amazing woman , my own mother, who taught me and my siblings the importance of honesty, compassion, respect for myself and others, and who always made me feel special exactly the way I am! But also understanding that we all have flaws and that’s OK. She also inspired me to be the best mother I could be for my baby girl! ☺️Obrigada mãezinha por ser uma mãe tão maravilhosa! TE AMO MUITO! 😍❤️ 💕 FELIZ DIA DAS MÃES 🥰

YOU ARE A FABULOUS WOMAN!

Like every single woman is! 😍

Today is the official day to celebrate women! I prefer to celebrate us every single day! So Happy Int’l Women’s Day today and every day! ❤️

HAVE YOU REALIZED HOW AMAZING YOU ARE?

When you look in the mirror, what you see is just the visual physical reflection of the genes you inherited from your parents, and the results of the lifestyle choices you’ve made so far, connected to the environment you live in. But that’s it! It’s just the physical part of you.

The TRUE woman is inside of you! That’s the one you need to focus on and take care of with a lot of love 😍When we focus on taking care of our soul, the physical part becomes a reflection of it.

Being beautiful to me is more connected to my inner Fabiana, than my physical appearance. The outside is just a reflection of how I feel and deal with my mental health.

This past year has been an interesting one for me as a woman, as menopause symptoms started to kick in! Because that physical part starts changing “away” from what society calls a beautiful woman. And as the age numbers go up, the ageism attitude towards me also increases. I’ve been receiving way more comments about being old and not “respecting” society aging rules, principally when I choose to show more legs 🤷‍♀️😁

But you know what ladies? WE ALL GET OLD, and I refuse to accept society’s rules that we stop being beautiful and have to hide in a cocoon. I honestly feel more beautiful than ever! AND SO ARE ALL OF YOU MATURE WOMEN!

Because I look inside and see a beautiful mature, resolved, confident and fulfilled human being and that for me, reflects on my outside aging body🥰. Don’t take me wrong, taking care of my skin, my physical health are certainly priorities for me. But being a beautiful woman to me starts inside!

HAPPY INTERNATIONAL WOMEN’S DAY TO ALL OF YOU FABULOUS WOMAN! Don’t let anyone tell you different! You ARE fabulous!! Let your inner light shine on the outside!

“BE THANKFUL FOR WHAT YOU HAVE AND YOU’LL END UP HAVING MORE. IF YOU CONCENTRATE ON WHAT YOU DON’T HAVE, YOU WILL NEVER, EVER HAVE ENOUGH “

This is one of the things I learned in life since I was a young girl. I did feel envy, like all of us humans do! 🤷‍♀️

But I learned at an early age to turn this feeling into something positive. I would say to myself: “well, if I don’t have this, or can’t have that, I better enjoy what I have or do something to change my situation” I moved my attention quickly from a negative perspective to a positive one! And that stayed with me for life! 😊

My parents always made me feel so fulfilled with love, safety, attention and always allowed me to be myself, and appreciated my entertainment nature (I always loved to entertain) 😁💃.

I remember at 8 years old carrying my LP player to the living room while my parents were having friends over and asking them to pay attention to me, because I was going to dance 😂😂😂. Making people genuinely smile is a such joy for me in a profound way I can’t explain.

I am so thankful for my family, my friends from near and far 💕, my health, the opportunity God gave me to share my gift to help transform other people’s lives, the chance I’m having to also share my passion for fashion and inspiring even more women at the same time to find their best version of themselves and most recently, the chance to work with my husband in growing our family business. I’m busy, but I’m happy and thankful!

I’m thankful to YOU who inspire me every day to use my gift and share what I can to make a positive impact in your life, even if small! 🙏🏼

Happy thanksgiving to you and your families. I wish you find it in you to see all the good things you have in your life today, and focus on them! YOU ARE FABULOUS! ✨

I thought of choosing a picture to post this message where I felt the most thankful this past year and I chose this one, which was taken this past Summer when my parents where in town and I organized a gathering so my daughter’s dad, his parents and his wife and kids could come so Bella could have the chance to be together with both sides of the family 🥰. Then I added some more 😍

MORE IMPORTANT THAN SAYING I LOVE YOU IS TO SAY I HEAR YOU!

When the communication in a relationship is not flowing like a perfect dance, it’s time to stop the dance, give it a step back and ask your partner: “what do you really want?” Then allow quiet space for them to respond authentically without feeling threatened or pushed by you.

At the end of the day, if you think about it, we just want to know we are valued and respected.

You can say the phrase “I love you” as many times as you want, but if your actions don’t correspond to how your partner actually FEELS loved, it will be just words thrown out in the air... that’s why the phrase “I hear you” said from the heart and with honesty, many times can be more impactful than saying that you love them.

In a relationship we want heart to heart connection, which requires vulnerability. But what makes it so hard, is the ego differences. Each one has their own ego needs.

THE POINT IS NOT TO SAY IF THEY ARE RIGHT OR WRONG…being open to HEAR them and understand their needs, at least will put you both in a position to create that vulnerability and allow the relationship to flow as smooth as a beautiful waltz, or maybe a lambada 😉.

What is the type of dance you actually think needs both partners to really rely on each other, instead. Of one carrying the other? 💃❤️🕺🏻

I’m very emotional today 🥹🥹

Today is Bella’s first day of senior year! Her last 1st day of regular school 🥹. It feels like yesterday when we took that first picture in 2015, in 5th grade when we created a tradition of taking the picture behind my car on every 1st day of school since then.

My only child is a delightful young woman whom I’m so proud of! She is creative, smart, a caring friend, a wonderful human being, who will impact many people’s live, I’m sure!

Last night I was crying, feeling sad she will go away next year to College in Europe, so far away 😩 But at the same time, a rush of excitement came to me in thinking how much excitement and fun she can have in her adult life! The selfish part of me of missing seeing her every day will always be there 😁, but my excitement to see what she will accomplish in her own life to be fulfilled in her own way is probably way more important and pronounced to me than anything else!

you are the most important human in my life! I wish with all my heart that you find the path in your life that can bring you all the joy, happiness and fulfillment I know that you deserve! TE AMO MINHA FILHA! 🥰 May this last year of school be as exciting as the beginning of your adult life when you move away from home.

But remember that mamãe will ALWAYS be here for you, independent on where you are in your life!

HAPPY FATHER’S DAY TO MY DAD IN BRAZIL! 🥰

Being a father of a girl is a very big responsibility! It’s the first male love in that girl’s life. It’s how that girl learns how to love and respect herself, learn how to be respected by a man. How to trust and feel safe around male figures.

I grew up always feeling loved and safe with my father. For that I feel blessed and very grateful, because many girls don’t have that chance in life, because their own dad did not know how or did not have the ability to give them love, respect and help them feel safe!

For those women who feel that way, my message to you is the following: YOU ARE LOVED, YOU CAN BE RESPECTED IF YOU LEARN HOW LOVE YOURSELF AND YOU CAN BE SAFE IF YOU LEARN HOW TO SET BOUNDARIES!

As a child, unfortunately we don’t have choices, but as adults, WE DO!

Choose what’s best for you. Maybe working with a professional to help you manage those feelings is a choice you can make! 💓

Happy Sunday to you! And a very big HAPPY FATHER’S DAY TO MY LOVING DAD IN BRAZIL. To this day he calls me by the nick name hw gave me as a little girl “PIPINHA” 🥰🥰🥰

ARE YOU WORKING TOWARDS MAINTAINING YOUR maHEALTH AS YOU AGE?

Lifting weights as we age is key for our muscle and bone health. It builds and maintains the muscle mass we lose with age! Swipe the pictures on this post to see an article by the Harvard Medical School on this subject.

Don’t wait to take care of your health! Start today! You can do it at home! And it’s a matter of discipline and choice, not your ability and just doing what you like for exercising …

Get a pair os weights and an online program and go for it!! Don’t have weights? Don’t like weights? There are many programs you can use body weight very effectively to work your muscles! You just need to create the discipline and choose to do it!

CHOOSE TO AGE IN A HEALTHY WAY! 😘

Who’s with me?!! 🙋‍♀️

COMPASSION AND EMPATHY KILLS SHAME

That happens because you feel seen for something way more valuable than just your circumstances.

That’s why Brené Brown said the following about shame:
“The only way to resolve shame is by talking about it! Shame can’t survive when it is shared! It loves its secrecy . When we “bury” our story, shame metastasises.”

But only share it with someone whom you trust and you know has compassion and empathy for you!

Shame is you believing that you ARE bad, instead of guilt, where you know you are good but you DID something bad. The behavior is not attached to your self esteem. Can you see how shame can be harmful? You think there is something wrong with you, when in reality it’s just a behavior that was not ideal and has all the chances to be fixed if you work to fix it. When you have shame, you believe there is no solution.

But when you share the shame, and receive the compassionate and empathetic ear of someone you trust, you have the chance to kill shame!

Did you know the difference between guilt & shame?

WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO BE A MOTHER?

I believe it means different things to different people. 😁💕

To me, being a mother is a result of how you raise another human being (independent of having carried that child in your womb) to become an independent, self confident, empowered human being who will become a positive member of society as an adult.

I was VERY LUCKY to be raised by an amazing mother! 🥰 Her example is what I follow to raise my own daughter. My mom knew exactly how to give me the right tools to find my inner strength and intuition and keep my sense of self worth intact my entire life, even during moments I could have doubted how worthy I was. If I questioned it, I found a way to immediately focus on who I believed I really was. The unconditional love I was always given by my parents and siblings is what makes me be such a strong willed and centered human. And today I feel blessed to share that during my work with other women as their coach.

I learned from a child psychologist once that if a child feels loved and safe around their caregivers, that child has all they need to thrive in life, even when the circumstances are not ideal. And I can clearly see that playing in the adult women I work with in my work as a Coach.

Whatever your concept is about being a mother, I hope you feel that being a confident mother is actually a choice in mindset, not a gift. Many women were raised by troubled moms, but ended up being a very confident and loving mothers themselves. They chose as adults to see motherhood by their own perspective, not their own troubled mother’s perspective.

Therefore, I wish all the mothers reading this message that you can choose to be a very confident and loving mom to your own kids.

A VERY HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY TO YOU AND YOUR MOMS! 💕😘

IMPERFECTION IS ENDEARING

When you perceive someone as perfect, the most common feeling to come to surface is envy.

But when someone stands up and accepts their imperfections with authenticity, that will most likely bring up a feeling of empathy, it’s endearing.

I’m not talking about standing up for having negative behaviors…. I’m talking about who we truly are as a human beings.

And when we allow ourselves to be authentically who we are, we show up in this world aa better human beings 🥰

Having issues being authentically you? You might need to rewire your brain, changing patterns that are probably coming from beliefs you have from childhood that might have served you then but no longer do.

Need help in working through that? Maybe I can help…