05/09/2020
Are there people who deny you? SWIPE ➡️ and READ ⬇️about what to do!
We both know the pain of being denied. We know how much we need to hear 'I believe you'. It hurts so much when there is nobody who can accept the truth about what we got through 😞.
It is scary to share the story when we can experience the pain of being denied again, isn't it? It needs so much courage!
What helped me to keep sharing my story was the understanding that if somebody denies me, there is always a reason for this person to do it.
👉 THE REASONS THAT SB DENIES YOU:
1. This person is an abuser, and he or she doesn't want to feel guilty. Nobody wants to think: 'I did something wrong'...
It is human to rationalize our behaviors even when the logic we create is... not logical. The violence is a coping mechanism for an abuser. They do everything to keep doing it because it meets their needs.
That's why there are so many people who still repeat that beating teaches children what is right and wrong, and it works...
2. This person was also abused but he or she is not ready to acknowledge it. You are the mirror for the shadow that doesn't want to be revealed. It would be so painful! He or she tries to avoid pain.
It is 'easier' to live in an illusion that nothing happened to me, my childhood was happy, my parents loved me, my partner is not so bad. Or maybe there is an illusion that it is easier🤔?
One day this person will break down because the pain can't be suppressed forever. Another unhealthy coping mechanism...
But maybe later he or she will be more ready to deal with their abuse🤔? I am asking this question as a survivor of childhood sexual abuse who started regaining the memories of it when I was 28.
👉 So how to deal with people who deny you? Understand and accept them. They can't believe you.
But keep sharing! This way you will recognize true friends, and recognize those with who you can't be close to you. You will connect with those who are brave to stay in the truth and live consiously like you ♥️!
👉 Double-tap and comment if it resonates with you. DM me if you feel like sharing!
PS. I am sharing my story with you. Link in BIO!
02/09/2020
Do you want a different life? Watch this video ⬆️! I am sharing with you the tips that worked for me when I was building a good life after a miserable one shaped by the abuse I experienced.
👉 Double tap if you want a different life. Start making changes in your life with sharing in the comment what would be your dream life ❤️!
PS. Check my recovery story where I tell you more about how my life changed! Link in Bio!
31/08/2020
How to take your power back after abuse🤔? Read this real story to get the answer ⬇️
It is a story of an old lady trying to break free of her abuser after years. I supported her last week and it truly seemed that he blocked every step of her. He had physical power, the ability to speak up, lawyers, money. She stayed with nothing in a vicious circle of abuse. Scared to death and stuck in feeling powerless...
I was honored to attend a meeting where they confronted each other. Me and her versus him with 3 people at his side. And the police. Aggression, manipulation... 😞 Full package of narcissistic abuse that was impossible to be stopped🤯.
She was stiff and anxious. She had difficulties to speak. Many times she just wanted to leave immediately. But she came there, she stayed until the end of the meeting. And she repeated 'no' as many times as she needed to respond to him. Quietly. Shortly. But consistently!
The process of taking the power back is not easy. Every 'no' and every moment when we stay although the fear wants us to escape, is a victory. And every moment like that makes us closer to the power within us. And this is the way how we learn slowly that we are more than we realize and we have the voice!
No matter how loud you speak, you have the voice and you are the winner when you use it ♥️. No matter if it is about a confrontation with your abuser or posting here on Instagram or starting therapy and opening up there - it is brave, it is huge, it is a victory and you are taking your power back.
How to take your power back after abuse? By speaking up about your truth, saying no, and not escaping when you feel fear. Patiently. Noticing that every time you feel stronger and you speak lauder🌞.
👉 Double tap if it resonates with you and say 'I am taking my power back' in the comment. DM me if you feel like sharing your victory!
PS. I share with you the story of how I took my power back after emotional, physical, and sexual abuse. Link in Bio!
20/08/2020
I BELIEVE YOU ❤️ And I am happy to say it to you because I wanted to hear it for so long... And those magical words made me feel much better!
What would you like to hear to feel supported, listened, and understood... ❤️?
👉 Say it in a comment as a message to other survivors like you!
👉 Reshare this post in stories to let others feel seen, heard, and connected to someone who understands 💥!
PS. I am a survivor of childhood abuse. I see you, I hear you and I believe you.
PS 2. Check my story - link in Bio ❤️. And look at the stories of Survivors who publish here on Instagram - in my highlites!
18/08/2020
💔 NOT TRUE that 'time heals all wounds'. There are wounds that can be healed only through the effort we make to recover, therapy, and support of others who understand.
And there are wounds that remain as a part of who we are. We are survivors❗When we dress our wounds, the scars will always remind us of how strong we have been 💞.
Jung said: 'I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become'. I say: 'I am what happened to me AND what I choose to become' 💛.
This photo of me was taken a year after I finished therapy. I moved to Bali and went to the ocean the first time. It was so warm, bright, and the water was cooling my body so well...
It came to me that a year before, I would have never believed how my life would change and how soon🤯. Two years before I would have never believed how close to healing I was...
If you are in pain today, I would like to tell you that you can't know how close to healing you are. Don't forget who you are - you are a survivor. Dress your wounds. Look for support. Be yourself and the good future will appear 💗.
👉 Double tap if you agree. 👉 Leave a comment or DM me if my words resonate with you 💛.
PS. Get inspired by my recovery story where I describe how my life transformed thanks to therapy. Link in Bio!
thank you for the words about time and healing on your profile. You nspired me to write this post 🤗 @ Los Angeles, California
17/08/2020
💙 Are you afraid that you are too broken to heal? Check👇 what is necessary to feel progress in recovery after abuse.
😥 I know you’re exhausted of constantly trying to heal and struggling with everyday life. I understand that you feel hopeless and powerless and it seems like nothing really works... I was there, too!!!
🤔 But what if there is just something missing in your therapy, and that's why it is like that? How would it be to feel the real progress after every session with your therapist and observe constant changes in your everyday life?
💥 This is what happens when you combine therapy sessions with everyday work by yourself in a way that you are very clear about what you work on, where you are and where you want to be. This clarity is a gamechanger!
👉 There are 4 things you need to focus on in the work with your therapist:
1. Understanding your patterns.
2. Learning how to express emotions and feel them in the body.
3. Communicating about your feelings towards your therapist openly.
4. Understanding your needs to move on with your life.
💥 But even if that's how your therapy looks like, a session once or twice a week without taking actions in your everyday life can't be really helpful. If you want to feel that recovery is happening and your life is changing into a better one, you need to combine the work in therapy with those four things you do by yourself:
1. Noticing the patterns in your everyday life.
2. Training self-expression when you feel emotions.
3. Practicing open communication with people around.
4. Making decisions, and taking actions to meet your needs.
💙 Healing is possible, but clarity is the fundament of it. That's what made a change in my recovery after childhood emotional, physical, and sexual abuse and let me build a great life where I am happy and honored to support other survivors in finding their CLARITY and making faster progress in therapy.
Double tap if you found this post helpful and feel free to DM me if you have questions💛.
PS. Check my recovery story. Link in Bio!
16/08/2020
Music is a part of my self-care routine. It helps me express my emotions and makes them naturally let go after some time. So when I feel sad or angry, I sing, and it is extremely helpful!
But there is also another way to use music as therapy. You don’t have to like singing, and you don’t have to know how to play any instrument...
I asked Jana Vysoudilová, who is a therapist combining many approaches, also music therapy, to tell us about how to heal through sounds and how a therapist could help us to reduce stress, heal our traumas and just feel better and live easier.
👉
Music therapy – an interview with Jana Vysoudilová
If you follow me in social media, you know that music is a part of my self-care routine. It helps me express my emotions and makes them naturally let go after some time. So when I feel sad or angry, […]
15/08/2020
💛 What could make you feel better today? ❤ What would you like to hear from another person that would make you feel supported, listened, and understood?
👉 Say it in a comment as a message to other survivors of abuse like you.
👉 And reshare this post in stories to let others feel seen, heard, and connected to someone who understands 💥!
PS. I am a survivor of childhood abuse. I see you, I hear you and I feel your pain ❤️
14/08/2020
❤ It is NORMAL to be filled with fear and self-doubts after the experience of childhood abuse...
Believe me: IT IS ENOUGH THAT YOU ARE STILL HERE TO BE PROUD OF YOURSELF. It is enough that you wake up every day to be proud of yourself 💛!
❓Why do I say that childhood abuse is 'the worst' nightmare? 👉Because a child has no choice to 'stay or leave'. A child is totally dependent on their parents and has to be obedient no matter how they abuse or neglect her or him... And a child always loves the parents unconditionally and needs them...
It is the worst nightmare to be abused and neglected by people you love and you are totally depended on...
💥But look, you are still here. It is really enough to be proud of yourself!!!
But if you think that it is not your achievement that you survived... If it comes to you that you had no choice... 😥
Then you can do what I found helpful in my healing and what some of my students also found helpful to finally believe that it is a HUGE ACHIEVEMENT that they survived their childhood.
But check it in yourself first.
It can be transformative but also triggering.
TRIGGER WARNING
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Read the words below, check online or in books if you need more...
That are many children who gave up and left. Yes, children do it. Even very young. Yes, it blows the mind...
👉 But there is the TRUTH BEHIND IT ABOUT ME AND YOU who are still here. We didn't give up and that's why we survived. It is an achievement. There were fighters inside us strong to survive the worst nightmare. It is something TO BE PROUD OF ❤!!!
I am proud of you that you are still here.
👉 Double tap if you are proud of yourself. Say 'I am a proud of myslef' in the comment to feel it more! Tag other survivors to express that you are proud of them ❤!
DM me to share your thoughts if my words resonate with you 🤗!
PS. I am so proud of myslef. If you want to read my recovery story, check the link in my bio.
@ Los Angeles, California
12/08/2020
💥Why most survivors DON'T heal? What is proper therapy to recover after abuse❓ SWIPE 👉 and READ ⬇️.
There is a reason why therapy takes years. There is a reason why most survivors of abuse have huge difficulties to overcome depression, anxiety, flashbacks, self-doubts, shame, guilt, hopelessness, powerlessness, distrust, codependence, dissociation, and hypervigilance...
One of the biggest differences between them and those who found a way to become free of the past is including bodywork in the therapy❗
Abuse makes a big disconnection between the body and the mind. It is written in the body like it is still happening and that's why there is no end for the trauma responses. At the same time, the mind tries to keep the disconnection to avoid the pain and it sabotages the healing process.
It is like the mind says: 'Nothing is happening because I choose to not feel the pain'. While the body screams: 'It is happening! Listen to me, listen!' It makes the mind go crazy causing all the struggles 🤯.
The problem is that most survivors in therapy are focused on talking and understanding. This way they still stay in the mind instead of building the connection with the body that could give them the opportunity to heal.
Talking is not an effective way to get through the defense mechanisms of the mind when you experienced abuse. Without the bodywork, there is no real healing.
💥 Proper therapy starts from awaking the body and then acknowledging, naming, and understanding your emotions through the mindwork. Then healing is happening and it doesn't have to take a long time before you feel good in your life!
Most of my students ask: Do I have to change the therapist if there is no bodywork included 🤔? It is not necessary. There are many supplementary activities you can do with other professionals or even by yourself to fill this gap and make your healing much more effective and faster. And your therapist will be supportive in this process for sure.
👉 Double tap if it is helpful and tell me what you think in the comment! DM me if you have questions ❤️!
PS. Click in the link in my bio to read how I changed all my life in just a year. @ Los Angeles, California
18/08/2020
17/08/2020
16/08/2020
15/08/2020
14/08/2020
12/08/2020