Wireback Works

I’ve been thinking a lot about overthinking.
Mostly because I know I do it. 🫣

For me, it often starts in my body before I even realize what is happening. My belly churns. My mind starts spinning. I try to figure it all out, solve it, control it, predict it, and get ahead of every possible outcome.

And, that doesn’t create clarity. It creates more noise and keeps me stuck in those spinning thoughts.

One thing I have learned through my own coaching experience is that the first shift is not to stop the thought.

👀It is to notice it.

That belly churning is an early warning signal.

When I notice it, I can pause. And then I can move from control into wonder.

Instead of:
“What if this goes wrong?”
“What do I need to fix?”
“How do I make this stop?”

I can ask:
“What is this telling me?”
“What is actually going on?”
“What are my options?”
“Is this really about this, or is there something else underneath?”
“What action would support me now?”

That shift is freeing - it creates possibilities.

It doesn’t mean I have all the answers.
It doesn’t mean I don’t still overthink.
It means I am practicing interrupting the pattern.

Notice.
Pause.
Wonder.
Choose.

The more I practice it, the more it becomes a habit.
It means that I spend less time overthinking and more time choosing how I move forward.

That is the power of coaching. Not having someone give you answers, but learning how to become a better observer of yourself so you can create new possibilities and take more intentional action.

Sometimes the simplest question can interrupt the loudest spiral.

➡️What question helps you shift when you are overthinking?

Leaders are often the last people they take care of.

They check on their teams.
They solve problems.
They support others.
They keep things moving.

And somewhere along the way, they stop paying attention to themselves.

But here's what I know to be true:

You cannot build a thriving workplace if you aren't thriving yourself.

The way you show up for yourself becomes the standard your team learns from.

When you recognize your own growth, you show others that growth matters.

When you arrive grounded rather than reactive, you create space for people to do their best work.

When you invest in your own wellbeing, you give others permission to do the same.

Leadership isn't separate from personal development.

The two are inseparable.

➡️How are you investing in yourself these days?

Read the full blog for more details.

AI is a bit like most leaders when it comes to feedback.

It often gives us the answer it thinks we are looking for.

Leaders do this too.

They worry about how we will react. So, they say nothing. Or soften the message. Or they say what they think we want to hear.

This doesn’t help anyone grow.

The reality is that feedback can be uncomfortable. We may question whether it is true. We may wonder what it says about our performance, our relationship with the giver, or even what does it say about me?

BUT without feedback, we miss the opportunity to learn and improve.

What I've been noticing lately is that the quality of feedback we receive is often connected to the quality of the questions we ask.

➡️Ask for feedback, not reassurance.

Get specific about what you want to know. Provide context. Be open to hearing something you may not have seen yourself.

I recently asked AI to review a leadership development session I was designing.

Not, "What do you think?"

Instead: "Please evaluate it for a 75-minute session, as well as in contrast to the outlined objectives for the session. What feedback do you have for me on this session?"

The response didn't just tell me it was good.

It rated the session on content quality, objective alignment, timing, and flow.

More importantly, it told me where I could improve.

🌟That's the value of feedback. Not validation. Direction.

The same is true when we ask our coworkers, leaders, teams, or coaches for feedback.

Better questions lead to better feedback.

So much of what happens around us happens instantly.

Need an answer to a question, you can get it instantly. Want to buy something, it just takes an instant. Want to talk to someone, just an instant to send that text or make the call.

But with ourselves, things take time and we’ve become so conditioned to the speed and instant satisfaction of everything else, it is easy to become impatient.
To think we aren’t succeeding.
To think I can’t do this.
To get frustrated and want to give up.

I encourage you to be patient with yourself.

If you aren’t seeing results, don’t give up.
🔸Recognize what you have done.
🔸Acknowledge the steps you are taking.
🔸Count all your practice.
🔸Write it down so you can see it.

Just don’t give up! And don’t expect instant results. If it were that easy we would all do it!

Leaders shape and create the environment.

It all starts with a foundation of psychological safety and trust.

Without that foundation, the culture will not be great.

Think about your culture as a garden.

You must focus on the foundation first, ensuring there is great soil and it has the nutrients needed for growth.

Once the soil is ready, you plant the seeds. And they need tended if you want them to grow.

☀️Light.
💦 Water.
❌Weeding.

Your culture is the same. You need to provide what it needs and your people need to flourish.

🔸Trust
🔸Safety
🔸Support
🔸Connection
🔸Recognition
🔸Engagement
🔸Communication

And sometimes you also need to do some weeding to remove what may be trying to takeover or infect what you are trying to grow.

It is all needed for a healthy environment.

It requires time, care, and attention.

How are you ensuring your environment is healthy?

Have you done a pulse check of it lately?

Where is this responsibility on your task list or strategy plan?

Don’t lose sight of what is happening in your culture and environment. It requires regular tending and it needs to be an area of focus and responsibility for leaders.

Fear-based leadership rarely looks like yelling or intimidation.

More often, it looks like:
🔸 constant urgency
🔸 withholding information
🔸 reacting poorly to mistakes
🔸 shutting ideas down too quickly

And over time, teams stop taking risks.
They stop speaking up. They stop bringing creativity and ownership to the table.

Most leaders never intend to create this kind of culture. But it happens quietly.

In our latest blog, we explore:
✔️ how fear-based leadership shows up
✔️ what it actually costs teams and leaders
✔️ practical ways to build more trust, hope, and psychological safety

One question worth reflecting on:
➡️When people leave conversations with you, do they feel more capable… or more cautious?

Read the full blog post: https://www.wirebackworks.com/blog/fear-based-leadership

There’s nothing quite like working for an employer who truly supports your growth and wants you to succeed.

These leaders at Premier Linen Company have that.

They showed up, shared vulnerably, and fully engaged in every session.

We talked about trust, conflict, feedback, accountability, coaching, and delegation.

But what I loved most was watching the shift happen over time. They started coaching one another — sharing what they had tried, what was working, and what they were still figuring out together.

The group included leaders with all levels of experience, from brand new managers to seasoned leaders who had already completed leadership programs before.

And every single person still found something to learn.

That’s leadership development.
The journey never really ends.

We keep growing ourselves while learning how to better support the growth of others.

💭What are you working on in your leadership journey?

Supporting leaders as they grow is some of the most meaningful work I get to do. If your team is exploring leadership development or coaching, feel free to reach out.

In a series of interview conversations, something became really clear to me. The same questions led to very different conversations.

I had the person who was direct and to the point.
Answered everything quickly, and we were done. (D-style)

I had the person who shared context, stories, details, and we used the full time allotment. (i or S)

I had the person I had to prompt and pry,
even offer examples to help them open up. (S or C)

And I had the person with a clear solution, and it was hard to get them to step outside of it. (often C… sometimes D)

Same questions. Different styles.

This is where your style shows up. And where it matters even more as a leader.

Because if I only ask questions my way…I won’t get the full picture.

I get the version that fits how they communicate.

So the work isn’t just asking better questions. It’s adjusting how you ask them.

🔸Creating space for some
🔸Adding structure for others
🔸Redirecting when needed
🔸Knowing when to let someone think out loud

DiSC helps us understand why. Leadership is deciding what to do with that.

💭Are you adjusting your approach, or expecting others to adjust to you?

My husband and I were working on a project together. I hit a step I couldn’t figure out.

We were missing critical labels needed for the instructions to work. My frustration was building. (And, I was also probably hungry.) 😩

So, I said, “I need a break.”

We stopped, ate lunch and came back.

I figured it out almost immediately.

Same problem. Same person. Different result.

The difference wasn’t the instructions. It was my state of being.

This is where your style shows up, especially when you are frustrated.

Because under pressure:
🔸some of us push harder
🔸some lose focus
🔸some get stuck
🔸some of us (me 🙋‍♀️) get caught needing it to be right

Under pressure, we default to our habits, just with less patience.

Your tone shifts.
Your patience drops.
Your openness closes.

And people don’t experience your intent, they experience your frustration.

The moment that changed it in this situation ➡️
“I need a break.”

That’s the work of leadership.

Recognize your state.
Choose how you show up.

💭What does your style look like when you’re frustrated?

What messages are you sending to your staff?

“Go back to your office.”
“Trust needs to be earned.”
“Stop asking for more to do.”
“I hate HR.”
“Promotion, but no salary increase.”
“You are spreading negativity.”

These are all things I hear from clients.
Messages they have been told.

What do you think those messages say to them?

Go back to your office → We don’t trust you to manage your work
Trust needs to be earned → We don’t trust you now
Stop asking for more to do → Stay in your lane
I hate HR → You’re not respected here
Promotion, but no salary increase → Your value isn’t recognized
You are spreading negativity → Don’t speak up

Whether you intend it or not…you’re always sending a message.

And those messages shape how people show up.

What they share.
What they hold back.
Whether they stay.

💭Are your words reinforcing the culture you say you want?