Caty Coffey Coaching

Many worries!

When you’re at a church retreat but you feel angry and anxious and not very close to God...

I have walked through similar situations with MANY clients, and here are some things I encourage them to do to handle it:

[tip # 1] Remove the pressure to have a “big God moment” and accept that you feel what you feel
[tip # 2] Have a scripted response ready if people ask personal questions you don’t want to answer (for example, “You are so kind to care about me. I think I want to use this time to stay quiet, to reflect, and to listen to God, so I’m trying to steer myself away from having a lot of conversation.)
[tip # 3] Remember that you can be close with God by sharing your honest emotions, not just by receiving clarity or encountering “God winks.”

And…if my client is still not feeling it, I encourage them to give themselves permission to leave early or to take a break away from other people.

Let me know in the comments what you do when you are faced with this type of situation.

This changed everything for me

If you are struggling to get through your day without snapping at your family or coworkers, you are not alone.

It’s a common problem that I hear about all the time from followers of Christ with unwanted, overwhelming emotions.

Here’s what I did that made all the difference:

I got curious about my anger.
I used to feel irritable, and I’d wallow in it. Then I started to treat it like it was a part of me that was actually trying to tell me something to help me; instead of seeing my frustration as my enemy, I made it my friend. Once the irritation was allowed, I started to discover the layers of what I really felt, and it wasn’t just anger. Getting emotionally honest like this helped me to know how to pray, and my prayers got a lot more deep, rich, and detailed. My irritability also didn’t stick around for long.

How about you? Are your emotions friend or foe? Comment below.

Hey, let's chat.

I don’t know how long you have been in my world or how well we know each other, but I wanted to tell you an experience that I had the other day that put some things into perspective for me.

I was talking to a client the other day who has struggled for years with anxiety, control, and fear of being alone. She restricted food to cope, and she was often close to tears. She felt nervous and shaky most of the time.

It was impacting her relationship with her boyfriend to the point that their relationship was on the rocks; it wasn’t a terrible relationship, but it wasn’t great, either. She couldn’t stand up for herself in the way that she needed so that it would be a healthy relationship. And she was always afraid she was losing him, which made her ask more from him than he was willing to give.

We worked together for a few months, and she saw amazing results, but the other day when I saw her, she told me that her boyfriend had broken up with her. I thought she was going to tell me how devastated she was, but instead she told me about how well she had been able to walk through her grief, process it, metabolize it, and move on. She was doing AMAZING. She was so grateful how the Lord had prepared her for the breakup through our work together. Not being afraid of her emotions and managing them so that she felt and then released them used to be out of the realm of possibilities until she learned how to metabolize her feelings according to the way that God created our mind-body system.

I tell you this to make sure you know that if you are struggling with out of control feelings, frustration for having painful emotions, anxiety, and fear of abandonment, that this IS possible for you to.

Ask me all of your questions! Comment or send me a DM.

Hi! Are you new here?

My name is Caty, and I am a mental health coach.
I’m a firm believer that there is a way through having overwhelming emotions that does not involve wallowing in your pain.

Feeling calm and at peace will always be in, and I am here for it!

I would love to send you my free guide called “4 Simple Steps for Christians to Manage Overwhelming Emotions and Feel More Calm, at Ease, and Connected to God” to help get you started.

Send me a DM and I’ll send it over!

It is SOOOO important to prioritize FUN in your week, but all too often other life priorities end up taking precedence.

Swipe>>> to learn how to prioritize fun in your life even with overpowering, unwanted emotions

What do you need to do to have more fun every week? Share in the comments!

Questions to ask yourself if you want to tame your big, unwanted feelings:

⭐️ WHY do I want to get rid of my overwhelming emotions?
⭐️ HOW will my life be different?
⭐️ What is the best thing I am looking forward to about feeling calm, content, and happy?
⭐️ What has stopped me from learning a new, better way to handle my emotions so far?
⭐️ What will my life look like 1 year, 5 years and 10 years from now if I do nothing to change how I feel?
⭐️ On a scale of 1-10, how committed am I to learning to control my emotions so that they don’t control me?

I would love to talk about your answers to these questions and get you started on the road to feeling at peace, in control, and connected to love from God and love from people.

Send me a DM so we can help you get clarity about what’s going on and what you need.

Change your visual depth of field by alternating between looking at something far away for 30 seconds and looking at something close to you for 30 seconds. Repeat 5 times.

Have you ever tried this? Let me know in the comments.

You don’t need to be the “expert”

I’ve been bumping up against this idea lately that people feel the need to pretend they know more than they do…

I was talking to a client yesterday morning who I thought knew more about a concept I was talking about than they actually did based on some information they had given me.

Three weeks later when they had made zero progress, they finally let me know they were struggling and needed some additional information.

Based on the NEW information they gave me about exactly where they were at, I was able to quickly get them unstuck and moving forward.

PLEASE don’t pretend you know more than you do or that you have it “more together” than you really do.

That helps nobody.

Ask the questions (all of them!)
DM me a question if you need clarification on anything I talk about
If you have a specific struggle about something I haven’t touched on…let me know

It helps me help you sooo much faster and chances are good someone else has the exact same question or struggle!

My biggest frustration (vulnerable post ahead)

My hands-down biggest frustration with being a person with naturally sensitive emotions is when I follow my own advice and do all the healthy emotion things, and I STILL sometimes get punched in the face by unnecessarily huge (and very bad feeling) emotions.

It honestly feels embarrassing because I feel judged by other people when I struggle as being too dramatic or too Type A. I certainly don’t want anyone to think I’m a crazy person!

When this happens, I lean into the truth of what God says about me, and I:

1. Remind myself that I am God’s beloved one, and He DELIGHTS in me
2. I lean in to the emotion with curiosity and compassion so that I can understand what it’s trying to tell me
3. Determine how much of what I’m feeling has to do with right now, and how much of it has to do with something that happened in the past - a feeling memory

None of these 3 things have anything to do with other people. They are all about treating myself and my emotions like I’m somebody that matters.

Oh, and if someone makes a rude comment, I make sure to give them an excellent good Southern lady passive-aggressive comment so they can’t tell if they’ve been complimented or insulted. 😉

Give me 🌸 if you can relate!