Healing Bruja Counseling and Consulting

Today is a hard day for me. If it's a hard day for you too, please know you're not alone 💜💜

Once you understand how coercive control works and how it affects victims mental health then you will understand it is a form of torture and psychological damage.
Biderman describes the stress and manipulation that was used on prisoners of war.

Many children are not reacting to what is happening now - they are reacting to what has happened before. Trauma changes how a child’s brain and body respond to stress. Their nervous system stays on high alert, scanning for danger, even when they are safe. This is why small situations can lead to big reactions. What looks like anger, avoidance, shutdown or people-pleasing is often a trauma response - fight, flight, freeze or fawn. These are not choices. They are automatic survival patterns shaped by past experiences such as neglect, abuse, loss or ongoing instability.

When adults see behaviour without understanding trauma, children can be labelled as challenging or attention-seeking. In reality, many are trying to cope with fear, shame, overwhelm or a deep need to feel safe. Real support starts when adults respond with calm, consistency and connection, not punishment. Feeling safe in relationships is what helps the brain settle and allows children to learn, trust and regulate again.

Free CHILDREN’S TRAUMA RESPONSES WHEEL – FIGHT, FLIGHT, FREEZE, FAWN BEHAVIOUR POSTER

LIKE the photo and comment "TRAUMA" and we will send you a message with a link to a free PDF of this resource.

If you’ve ever thought, “Is it really abuse if it’s not physical?” this might change everything. 🧩

Many survivors say the first time they saw the Power and Control Wheel, what they were living through finally made sense. It lays out the common tactics abusers use to gain and keep dominance—like isolating someone, minimizing harm, twisting reality, or making big promises that “it’ll never happen again.”

What felt confusing or deeply personal starts to look like a pattern—and that realization can be both heartbreaking and empowering. It’s not a misunderstanding. It’s a system built around control.

Have you ever seen a resource that put words to something you couldn’t explain before? Share in the comments—or pass this along to someone who might need it. 💜

🔗 https://zpr.io/4yPAKQMmbsz5

It absolutely lands differently for teens on the spectrum