In Loving Memory of Jeffrey Brandon Fulton

Scarlet red
Drips from my veins
What's wrong with me
That I imagine such things?
And if only for a moment
Let there be peace
And how can I
Live with this pain?
I don't have the strength
To conquer this shame
And if only for a moment
Let there be peace
And tell me, did you know
That I still won't let it go?
And just maybe
You're still flying free
If only
And tell me why
I'm left here alone
I search for your voice
But I should've known
That if only for a moment
You'd be with me
And tell me, did you know
That I still won't let it go?
And just maybe
You're still flying free
If only I could change the way
You were torn away from me
I would never let you go
I'd burn away the plans we made
Pretending to believe
That I am not afraid
And tell me, did you know
That I still won't let it go?
And just maybe
You're still flying free
And tell me, did you know
That I still won't let it go
And just maybe
You're still flying free
If only

If Only Provided to YouTube by CDBabyIf Only · TiffanyThe Color of Silence (Deluxe Edition)℗ 2001 TiffanyReleased on: 2001-07-18Auto-generated by YouTube.

If you ever wondered why I’m bulletproof,
It’s all because of you.

Jamie Fine - Bulletproof (Lyrics) jamie fine - bulletproof (Lyrics) Don't miss out! Subscribe and click the bell icon!🔔 🎧 Stream & Download: https://apple.co/3sXznmO🎵 Aura Network Spotify:...

January 10, 1994…the day my world stood still. Time does not and has never healed my heart. I simply learned to exist.

Marcus Soriano, Jeff and myself at the mall in 1993.

Happy 48th Birthday in Heaven, Jeffy-poo. 💜

30 years today…why does it still hurt? I wish you were here to see your nephews and your great nieces and your great nephews…😢

We have reached 200 followers! Thank you for your continued support. We could not have done it without each of you. 🙏🤗🎉 Love, Michelle (Tracey) and Danny Stutzman (Jeffrey’s sister, and Jeffrey’s best friend).

You would have been 47 this weekend. It still feels like yesterday that we lost you. Happy Heavenly Birthday, Jeffy-Poo. 🥰😢

Yesterday what has been your 46th birthday. I miss you so much that most of the time I won’t even admit it because I am so angry at you for stealing those light from my eyes and my heart. I’ll look at my children and their children and I see so much of you in them. You cheated your nephews of an uncle and your great nephews and great nieces of an incredible human being who had so much potential and could have brought so much to their lives. Your death destroyed our family and when you died you took our entire family with you. Mom and dad lost the wheel to live and win the cancer took hold they couldn’t fight. I can’t believe it is taking me 28 years to say that to you but I hope that wherever you are you can see this message and you can feel the pain that you left behind. Time does not heal all wounds and I hope that wherever you are that you are able to see and feel the damage that you did. I love you, I have always loved you, I practically raised you. But that doesn’t change the fact that you made a stupid decision and the reason doesn’t matter because the only thing that counts is the result. I’ve lived with survivors guilt for 28 years and I’ve beat myself up over and over again about what I could’ve said or done differently that could have changed our fate. I miss you so much it hurts but even more than that I miss me… I miss the me that you killed the day you died. Because I died that day too. I debated whether or not to even make a post this year but I hope that somebody somewhere will read these words and make a different decision than you did because if your story or mine saves one person or makes one person think twice then these words were worth it. there are more people grieving your loss 28 years later than you ever knew I loved you and I hope that wherever you are you feel that love and somehow find a way to comfort all of them because we would have much rather had you here with us. happy birthday baby blue eyes. 😢

After all this time?

Always…