Your Story Matters

04/18/2019

Hello Everyone,

Apologies for letting the page stand dormant for so long. Things have been moving behind the scenes quite a bit. I am excited to announce that on April 23 at Westminster college the video will be shown again and a discussion will take place about the future of the video. Thank you all!

10/17/2017

Hello everyone! I know it’s been awhile since anything has happened on the page and we apologize for that! Had some amazing things come up in terms of the video and when we have more things finalized we can get back to posting personal stories!
I just wanted to say that we are thinking of everyone who might be struggling with their situation. I know that the “me too”’s has been going around Facebook and for some people it’s a liberation to show they are not afraid of what happened while to others it’s scary because if they post, they are admitting to everyone that something happened and maybe they themselves aren’t ready to share. Wherever you may fall in that spectrum just know that there are people who support and love you! Don’t forget that you are not alone and that your story matters!

07/17/2017

The following pictures show a young man talking about his female friend who was involved in intimate partner violence. While his interview was brief, by looking at the photos one can tell how his friends' pain affected him. If someone you love is hurting, please be a friend like this young man was, and be there for your friend.
Please do not tag the man in the photos without his permission. He asked to remain anonymous for a reason.

06/30/2017

This post is not another story, but rather some food for thought. While a person is going through the motions of reporting their situation if they choose to do so or even just telling someone about it, everyone is concerned for the survivors well being. After all the "fuss" calms down people tend to forget the survivor doesn't get to forget. The survivor still has to deal with the situation even if it is not on the front of their brain. The survivor has to learn to work around what happened in their life to try to get back to normal. Some survivors even have PTSD. This can happen dramatically where it's obvious the survivor has PTSD or it can happen so quietly that the survivor doesn't even really know. Even if they know or not, the survivor still has to live with the struggle. It could be something like a loud noise, or even down to something as simple as a color combination. To tie this post together, what I am urging friends and survivors to do is learn their/your signs. Learn what triggers, and what calms. Have a game plan of what to do in case it becomes overwhelming. In a perfect world everyone would be able to move on, but sadly it doesn't happen that way, so I am encouraging everyone to be prepared, but don't be scared. Having reactions to traumatic experiences is normal, and is the brains way or protecting itself and the body. Through different methods and tricks you can actually retrain your body to not react so harshly.
Please leave a comment below on any tips or tricks you've Or a loved one has tried.

06/09/2017

ever think that negative s*xual situations only happen to women? This young man shows that men are affected too. When we conducted the interview with him, he wanted to show he was male and a frat guy without showing his identity and luckily that day he happened to be in a frat shirt. He agreed for us to photograph his shirt to help end the stigma that stuff like this doesn't happen to men, or that men cannot talk about it. It is heartbreaking to think of how many men signed up to be a part of this project but backed out because they thought they would be perceived as weak or they were so terrified of their buddies finding out and mocking them. I hope in viewing this man's story you will begin to understand that this happens to men too. please be more receptive to everyone in your life. Again even if you know the man in the photos, do not tag him without his permission. He asked his face to be hidden for a reason.

05/16/2017

Hello everyone! I apologize for not posting last week, but we have another story for you. This story, like all the others, is hard to read, but I hope that her story will touch you and will help others who may be in a similar situation. Again we ask that you do not tag the person in the video without her permission, she asked to be anonymous for a reason.

05/01/2017

Hello everyone. This is a story not featured in Your Story Matters but when this girl came to me with her story I could not refuse her request to post her story. Just a reminder, if you know who this girl is, I ask that you do not tag her without her permission.
When a girl came to college she expected what every college freshman expects. However, her first few weeks were not ideal. She was assigned to live in a suite with a group of girls but it was obvious within the first few days they would not get alone. Their personalities clashed and she felt like the odd one out of the group so much so that her stuff would get stolen or hidden from her as a cruel prank. She went to residential and greek life to request a room change but they refused until second semester She was miserable to the point she thought of dropping out of the school altogether. The weekend before Labor Day she was at her wits end. She had been trying to numb the pain she was experiencing with a cocktail of painkillers but she knew she couldn’t do that all semester. So, she thought if she went home for a bit it could recharge her. She didn’t have a car, and she wasn’t close enough to anyone on campus to ask for a ride to St. Louis. So she went to the internet and found a man on craigslist who lived in Colombia who ran a transport service who would be willing to drive her to St. Louis. He picked her up at 2am, a few hours later than she had agreed, but she was so desperate to go home that she just shrugged it off. In the car he said he needed to stop in Columbia to pick up something, she assumed he needed his wallet or something like that. They passed the exit for Columbia and he kept going. They passed every exit on I-70 for two hours and she fought to stay awake. But sleep overcame her and she fell asleep in Kansas City. He dragged her inside with a hand over her mouth and he said it was so she couldn’t wake up his roommates. It was later discovered that his house was a half-way house for s*x offenders and she was stuck there. He locked her in the closet in the basement for around 12 hours. She luckily still had her phone so she was texting her sister and told her where she was. Her sister told her to call the police and to tell their mother, but she wanted to keep everything quiet, and even tried to bribe her sister with gas money. She also texted other people for help, but everyone said no or had an excuse not to. Any attempts to break the door down was worthless. The guy came back to the closet around 3pm smelling of fryer oil and in a fast food uniform and he let her out to use the bathroom and she told the man she needed to go back to school for a project. The man showed he was upset that he had to drive a young smart college girl away from her school and she should have stayed. She begged him to take her back but his response was punches, and choking. After hours of abuse and begging the man finally caved and decided to drive her back. She texted her sister that everything was going to be ok and she was on her way home but her phone quickly died. she convinced the guy to pull over at a 24-hour Starbucks and when she went inside she told the barista to call the police and she hid in the bathroom. She was there for half an hour and when the police arrived the man was arrested for violating his parole, abduction, and battery. She stayed in the Starbucks with another police officer who administered first aid. She walked away with a busted lip, bruised trachea a broken shoulder, broken ribs, and assorted bruising from his punches. It was 3am when her family had finally made it to Kansas City, and thankfully they were not mad at her, just relieved she was safe. When she returned to school her suitemates didn’t really care what had happened, perhaps they thought she was faking. Per the recommendation of the school she went to the counselors but besides that she didn’t feel like she had a support group. She was told by the police to not talk about it until he was sentenced. He is now in prison and is a registered s*x offender. She remained at her school and eventually found a group of friends she could be close too. But she will never forget the loneliness she felt and the horror she experienced. She still blames the school and her suitemates for driving her to finding the man.

04/24/2017

Hello, everyone. This week's story is featuring a young man telling about the time he found out a close friend of his was r***d. Different situations, especially hard ones like r**e, are not only hard on the survivor, but also on those around them. Thank you so much to the student who was willing to share this story.

04/18/2017

Hello everyone. Here is the personal story of a survivor who participated in "Your Story Matters". I hope that her story will touch your hearts and that you will be able to take something from it. Again we ask that you do not tag the survivor without her permission because she did ask to remain anonymous for a reason.

04/08/2017

Hey everyone, I just want to thank you all for the support many of you have given since the beginning of this project and also thank you to the new supporters we have accumulated the past couple days. This project is so important and I hope that it will give a voice to those who feel they have no voice. Every week for about 17 weeks we will be posting a unique story. You might recognize parts of the stories, as almost all of the weekly stories were featured in the "your story matters" video. Please, we ask that you do not tag the survivors without their permission. If you have a story that you wish to share to the page please feel free to do so. We will love you and help you through it as much as we can.

04/07/2017

Please feel free to share the video. But when sharing please don't tag the people in it.

Thank you all to everyone who attended the Westminster Women's Conference event and supported us.

Please note that the stories are powerful and might affect us differently.

Your Story Matters is a project that started at Westminster College (Fulton, MO) as a space for survivors of s*xual & domestic violence and assaults to share...