Your Story

Feeling so much gratitude for everyone who shared in our celebration, those who made us laugh, those who made us cry, and those who uplifted us (even literally on the dance floor). To be seen and accepted and loved is the greatest gift 🤍

your talent is beyond words. You surpassed my wildest dreams and made my garden dreams come true - the dining room looked and smelt like heaven 🤍

thank you for capturing all these special moments so we can relive all the joy we felt

Being open to possibility requires shifting our attention from our limits, fears, and problems to our hopes, dreams, and purpose.

This mindset shift requires a conscious decision to focus on what is in this present moment, recognizing that we create our own reality with the stories we tell ourselves.

So what does a downward spiral story sound like? It sounds like this conversation I had with myself—> Maybe you should sign up for yoga on Saturday. That would be a great way to meet people! BUT you aren’t really good at yoga and do you even have the right mat? And what if, what if, what if —> into the downward spiral!

Shifting to speaking from the perspective of possibility the conversation sounds more like —> Maybe you should sign up for yoga. You’re no expert and it’s okay to be afraid to try new things, but what a great opportunity to learn and stretch yourself - literally! If you don’t have the right mat, you can still do downward dog and maybe someone there can recommend something if you truly find a new one is necessary.

The second story is the one I chose to tell myself last weekend and I so enjoyed my morning with 🤍

What stories can you shift to open up new possibilities in your life?

My hair is wild, but I feel so calm!

Last night, I met Holly at from and we talked all about self-care.

One of her self-care practices is using heating pads like this one filled with lavender 💜

After an amazing night of connecting at the event, I was too wired to settle into sleep. So I warmed this up, put it on, and started to signal to my body that it was time to relax.

Small practices can shift our experience and can signal to our body to let go, to slow down, that it’s safe. I love how this simple pillow uses my senses to ground me and bring me back to the present moment!

We’ve been talking about self-care at our weekly women’s group and it takes so many forms. Many of us are familiar with the physical - massages, stretching, acupuncture, but there’s also the inner work of self-care - journaling, meditating, setting boundaries.

I wholeheartedly practice self care in all realms of body, mind, and spirit - but the inner work is my jam!

What’s a self-care practice that allows promotes your wellbeing?!

Last month my sister and I took the most special trip together. It was my unconventional “bachelorette” party and it was the most refreshing, rewarding, and life giving celebration.

I really enjoy hiking so we picked Denver for our trip, found a place to stay and left the rest open ended. I was so appreciative that our time away allowed me to be me - early nights, lots of physical activity, and really really really good food. My sister gave me the space, time, and grace to be me and do exactly what I wanted in celebration. I don’t know that I’ve ever been on a trip where I wasn’t following an agenda or trying to cater to someone else’s needs - it was a true gift to be seen and cared for in this way.

I know at times what I wanted (lots of hiking) pushed my sister out of her comfort zone, but we made it through together and I accepted her boundaries and was able to get in a great solo hike on our final day!

I got lots of questions from people about why I was doing this for my bachelorette and comments like “are you even doing anything fun?”

All this reminds me that when you know yourself and make choices that meet your needs and not the expectations of others, people will question you. But, if you follow through with what you know is best for yourself it will lead to the most rewarding life experiences.

It’s taken me years to know what I want and need to be well. This trip is a manifestation of lots of reflection, lots of experimentation with different activities, and a paying attention to and getting curious about the things and people that bring me joy.

I have so much gratitude and feel so much warmth when I look at these pictures. I hope everyone has an opportunity in their life to experience alignment and fulfillment of your most authentic self!

🤍 you
studio

On ‘s podcast Dare to Lead she talks with Dr. Linda Hill, a professor and chair of leadership at HBS. They discuss leading with purpose in the digital age and how digital transformation is less about technology and more about people.

There were so many good takeaways that I found applicable to my own personal transformation process. I found myself asking how do I innovate in my life and direct my days with purpose. Who do I need to be to do that? What support do I need to sustain that change?

This quote - “everybody has a slice of genius” - is such a good reminder to stay curious and to acknowledge ourselves and others as whole, fully capable, human beings. Imagine if we treated everyone like they held a hidden treasure or a slice of genius?

Might it cause you to ask more questions, or spend more time getting to know them, or make you reach out to them for help, or request their opinion in a conversation?

We all offer something unique to this world. Whether at work or in your day to day life I encourage you to seek out the genius in others and to observe the impact in your life.

Our definitions, beliefs, and values shape the way we experience the world and make meaning of it.

What is your current definition of success? What does it mean to be successful?

Simply redefining success could transform the way you approach your day to day life.

One alternate definition or perspective that I found valuable was: being a contribution instead of being a success.

The most commonly accepted definition of success includes the acquisition of wealth, fame, or respect/power. It’s the accomplishment of something, but that something in our society always seems to be self-serving. It also seems to be a peak, a place you arrive to, a status your earn when you have a certain amount of money or a fancy job title.

Taking the perspective of being a contribution, we shift the focus from ourselves to others. You start asking “how can I help and make a difference” instead of “what do I need to do to get myself that next promotion.”

Being a contribution is a daily practice, there is no summit to reach or title to attain, it’s a daily call to action.

With this new mindset, I’ve also found myself more willing to take risks. With success as my aim, I was so afraid to fail - it was a setback on my journey. Now, aiming for contribution, I see failure as a part of the process - it’s what allows me to learn, grow, and better serve myself and others.

Whether you redefine success or adopt a new aim for who you are trying to be in the world, I hope this helps!

This is so simple and so difficult.

We have grand expectations about our lives and our relationships. We paint pictures of what life should look like and feel frustrated and disappointed when those expectations aren’t met.

provides some great tips for managing our expectations in her latest book - Atlas of the Heart; but even when we do those things it can still be challenging to accept what is.

When we start to sense the feeling of disappointment or frustration - acknowledge it. Say hello!

Get curious, in a non-judge mental way, just ask yourself why am I feeling this way?

Be okay with feeling into the emotion. Don’t resist it, lean in and move through it.

I find it helpful to name the emotion, ground myself with a few deep breaths, and then start asking myself some questions and getting curious. I’ve even adopted a practice from the art of possibility of saying to myself “how interesting!” when an outcome, reaction, or feeling isn’t what I expected.

“How interesting” moves me into curiosity and away from the frustration of “how annoying.”

How do you stay present and accept the way things are?

These posts were so much fun to make and I can’t think of a better way to show this community who I am and what I’m all about!

There’s a lot of labels I could put here to convey what type of person I am, but I’ll try something different.

My name is Ariel and a good portion of my days are dedicated to learning - learning more about myself and how our inner world works. I enjoy the work of .kabat.zinn and many others. Their research and life experiences have pushed me deeper into my own work. My mission is to help myself so I can help others. And more specifically I want to help others lived a fulfilled life.

This mission is deeply personal and tied to my own life story. As I became independent, went away to college, got my first job, I felt free and also so so lost. As a perfectionist (working on that still), I was following the rules of “how to live” to a T and doing everything I needed to do to be successful. I was certain that doing everything right guaranteed me the good life. I couldn’t have been more wrong! I was so unhappy, stagnant, and disconnected. And now that my rules were useless or not giving me the results I wanted, how was I supposed to know what to do next?

There was a lot of trial and error as I figure it out. I kept defaulting to my old ways of living because it was all I knew. It wasn’t until it all fell apart that life forced me to rewrite the rules and start fresh.

Reflecting on it now, I am so happy it all came crashing down. It wasn’t serving me and during those years I was a really stressed out, judge mental, and I would even go so far as to say unkind person. I was not myself and I needed to find her.

My work has allowed me to excavate the best version of myself and uncover the potential I always knew I had. I will forever be on my own journey of self-discovery and development, but hope to connect with others who are walking the same path so we may do it together.

Some of the new rules of life that I integrate everyday are
🤍 be brave
🤍 love yourself
🤍 stay wild

Last night Tara] and I wrapped up our last discussion group on Atlas of the Heart and it was so bittersweet.

Over the past five weeks, we’ve gathered with a courageous group of strangers to talk about our emotions and process Brene’s work. Last night we all shared something we’ve learned about ourselves through the discussions and I was so moved by what was shared. It gives me such hope in humanity that we have spaces where vulnerability is encouraged and the focus is on getting it right, not being right.

Bittersweet is a moving emotion from happiness to sadness, a recognition that this moment is fleeting and we can’t get it back. It’s heavy, but also heartwarming and this is what I felt as I looked at the faces on my screen last night. Such immense gratitude for everyone who showed up to create such a rich discussion, knowing I am a different and better person for this experience and yet sadness that this was the end of our journey together (for now).

I am learning to feel both the happy and the sad together, to celebrate what has been and accept that it is over. Complex moving emotions are great places to get curious and unpack why we are feeling a certain way.

I am so appreciative of Tara] for her partnership and encouragement over the past 5 weeks!

It has been bittersweet and beautiful 🤍

In her final episode of Atlas of the Heart, talks about the importance of feeling our emotions in our body.

Many of us privilege thinking over feeling, meaning we listen to our minds and not our bodies. We ignore the tightness in our stomach, our body’s warning, and say yes what our mind tells us is right.

So many of us are disembodied, unaware, and numb to what we are feeling and in doing so, we are repressing our truth.

It is a vital practice and habit to bring ourselves back to our bodies and to listen to and honor them.

Above are some steps for being in your body and living an embodied life. A great place to start is to simply pay attention to what your body feels like when you experience certain emotions.

I’ve been approaching it like a treasure hunt - what is this signal or clue my body is giving me? What is it telling me about my inner experience? How can I respond to honor my body?

All these clues have been so valuable in understanding my experience day to day so I hope these questions help you as well!

What we pay attention to impacts how we experience life.

Our energy, time, and resources are finite, but have we stopped to think about where we’re placing them?

I love to garden, so this analogy really spoke to me. What am I paying attention to when I’m in my yard? Do I focus on the weeds or imperfect lawn? Do I pay attention to the unfinished walkway?

Or do I notice the new growth in my herb pots I just planted. Do I point out the hostas poking through the fresh mulch?

Whichever perspective I choose to take, whatever I decide to see and pay attention to will impact my experience and feelings about my garden. One will leave me feeling bad about the things that aren’t right and the other will encourage me to continue planting and enjoy the fruits of my labor.

This isn’t about forced positivity- it’s about making conscious choices that better align with who you want to be and the life you want to life.

I want to be a grateful Gardner. Someone who enjoys the work in process and can appreciate the beauty of small progress.

What do you want to grow in your life?

🌷🌷🌷

The stories we tell ourselves are just that - stories - they’re all invented. And we have the ability to rewrite and reinvent them.

Our minds are designed to connect the dots and create a storyline, even when there is no connection. Our mind rationalizes, trying to piece together cause and effect, whether grounded in reality or not. All of these frameworks we create in our mind are based on unconscious assumptions so as we pull together a story it’s reflecting back to us beliefs we may not even know we hold.

What does all of this mean? Our mind is super powerful and has the ability to construct meaning in our lives.

Knowing this, we can use this powerful tool to help us invent a story and new framework that enhances the quality of our life and moves us towards our purpose.

Here’s a great example…

I keep delaying on taking the next steps to hold a local workshop. I tell myself that I’ll do it once I have my coaching certification complete, even though all of the content to facilitate is ready to go. I assume that people will think I’m unqualified without the certification and that no one will show up.

Going even deeper, I’m probably protecting myself out of fear of failure. I am assuming that no one cares about what I have to offer.

But I can change that narrative and offer myself a different framework that opens up new possibilities - I could tell myself that no one is ever fully ready, that I possess exactly what I need in this moment to make a contribution to my community, and that it’s all learning. I can choose to step into the discomfort and actually allow myself to do the thing I want to do in the world instead of creating narratives that hold me back and keep me safely waiting, preparing, and self-developing in my comfort zone.