The Cave Collective

The Cave Collective Trauma-informed Astrology and coaching services, based in Singapore. Heal from your past trauma and reclaim your unique purpose! With Love and Light,
Jeremy Tan

Growing up, I’ve always related to the feeling of being lost. I remember the dreadful moments when I was alone without any guidance or mentorship to support me on difficult journeys and challenges. Astrology first called out to me as a superficial instrument of control that instilled feelings of predictability and certainty that I desperately wanted to rely on in a seemingly unpredictable world. M

y sense of safety was derived from a reliance on external sources, rather than learning how to trust my own inner authority. This all changed having completed an apprenticeship which opened my eyes to looking at Astrology through a psychological lens. I was awakened to my family trauma of an absent Father wound that was passed down from one generation to the next. By learning how to reparent myself and heal from the Father wound, I realized I could embody Saturn’s wisdom and structure to empower others and myself. Finding my way back to my own authority and authenticity, I now feel empowered to guide others to do the same for themselves and end their own patterns of generational trauma. Natally, I have Saturn on my midheaven and North Node in Capricorn. It is of no coincidence that Sacred Saturn was birthed during a Saturn transit to my North Node which marked a monumental beginning to the embodiment of my own purpose. Sacred Saturn is as much a healing journey for me, as I am a guide for others on their own healing journey to reclaim their authentic selves. It is my honour and privilege to be able to hold space for you and guide you towards finding your way back home to Self - where you too awaken to your own personal power and purpose, realising that all that is has always existed within you.

Chances are you’re still engaging with the same wound through the same lens.But what we don’t need is more effort. More ...
07/06/2026

Chances are you’re still engaging with the same wound through the same lens.

But what we don’t need is more effort. More trying harder.
Instead, we need to learn how to relate differently.

To see and witness differently the Parts of us we’ve spent years criticizing, hiding, suppressing, or abandoning.

As long as we remain identified with the same internal shame structure, we will continue relating to ourselves through the same patterns that created the suffering in the first place.

If this resonates with you and you’d like support exploring the Parts, patterns, and internal structures shaping your life and relationships, Book a free alignment call using the link in my bio to find out more.

12/04/2026

The reason change feels so difficult has less to do with willpower and more to do with the environments we are in.

When we return to the same spaces, the same relationships, the same family systems — our nervous system defaults back into the familiar role we have always been playing.

The capable one. The accommodating one. The one who doesn’t make things difficult.

Our sense of self was fashioned through the eyes of others.

We internalised an image — of who we are, what we’re worth, what we’re allowed to need — and that image was formed in relationship.

And any movement away from it carries the threat of exile. Of rejection. Of no longer being recognisable to the people our belonging depends on.

The existing dynamic only holds because every player requirws the other to play their respective roles.

Change one, and the whole structure can feel like it is collapsing.

This is why it is not always as simple as cutting ties or drawing firm boundaries.

Sometimes the people we are outgrowing are also the people whose wellbeing is still genuinely entangled with the role we play.

To suggest otherwise often comes from a position of privilege that doesn’t account for the full weight of what someone is carrying.

So maybe what we truly need are new eyes to be witnessed through.

New spaces that hold a different image of us. Environments where a newer, truer version of who we are can be met, normalised, and slowly stepped into.

Where the old image begins to lose its charge.

This is precisely what I’m mapping inside The Projection Field.

A workbook that reveals how shame structures your psyche and unconsciously shapes every relational dynamic you enter.

If you have ever felt like you know what needs to change but keep finding yourself pulled back into the same patterns the moment you return to familiar ground — this resource was built for you.

Comment ‘Field’ below if you want first dips on this once it’s out.

The deepest relationships will crack us wide open.They reveal the performative roles we’ve always been playing.They surf...
11/04/2026

The deepest relationships will crack us wide open.

They reveal the performative roles we’ve always been playing.

They surface the parts we’ve had to hide because it never felt safe to express them.

Most of us will meet that activation and do what we’ve always done.

Blame the other person. Walk away and find someone new. Only to find the same dynamic and triggers repeating across different faces.

But a few will get curious about what this charge has always been pointing us towards.

Asking for more self-honesty and ownership.

To meet where we hold shame over ourselves, and acknowledging how we’re been expecting someone else to carry what we haven’t yet been willing to own.

To see into how we’ve been clinging onto performative roles, and what we’ve been asking the other to carry, so the story we wish to protect about ourselves stays intact.

This is the Projection Field at work.

It’s a framework I’m mapping out having worked with over 500 clients over the last 4 years.

It contextualises what I keep witnessing in the room: how we internalise shame and relegate parts of ourselves into the shadow.

How the unconscious perpetuates itself through our relational dynamics and projections onto one another.

I’m building this out as a resource that I aim to make available by the end of this month.

Can’t wait to share this with you guys!

07/04/2026

The persona is the public mask we construct to survive the world’s gaze.

It is not who we are. It is who we learned we needed to be to remain safe, accepted, valuable in our social spheres.

In the early stages of a relationship, the persona holds.

We present our most curated self. The responsible one. The easygoing one. The selfless one.

And the attraction we feel is partly the ego’s relief of being seen in that image by someone else, of having the mask confirmed as real.

Until true intimacy cracks it wiiiiide open.

The closer two people become, the more exhausting the persona is to maintain.

And slowly, what was hidden behind shame, surfaces.

The confident one starts appearing small.
The selfless one starts keeping score.
The easygoing one starts holding resentment and anger for things not going their way.

To many, it could feel like the other person is changing. That who they were with before is no longer the same as it was.

When really what is happening is that we are finally seeing them as they are.

And this is where most relationships break down.

Because when the mask dissolves, what appears underneath is the shadow. The traits that never felt safe to own publicly. The needs that were never allowed to be voiced in the open.

Yet we internalise them as disappointment. We feel deceived. We feel let down.

And so we pull away, or we fight to restore things as they were before.

But one thing I keep coming back to across all my client sessions is this.

The couples that find their way through this are the ones who learn to hold what surfaces in the other, without immediately meeting it with the same shame and judgement that exiled it in the first place.

That quality of witnessing is what shifts the entire dynamic.

Because it offers the very space the exiled part has always needed, but never received.

This is what intimacy is actually asking of us.

What do we do when the masks comes off? How are we confronting these truths?

And whether the relationship is worth rebuilding from a place of what truly is, rather than what we hope could be.

So much of what we’re seeking is simply self-acceptance.But for that to happen, we have to sit with the parts of ourselv...
30/03/2026

So much of what we’re seeking is simply self-acceptance.

But for that to happen, we have to sit with the parts of ourselves we’ve been most conditioned to shame, repress, or pretend don’t exist.

The parts we learned early were too much, too slow, too messy, too difficult to explain. The parts that didn’t fit the image we were told was acceptable. So we pushed them down. And in doing so, we lost access to something real in ourselves.

The irony is that the very parts we’ve been hiding are often the ones carrying the most honest intelligence about who we are and what we’re actually here for.

Most of us were never taught how to meet those parts. We were only taught how to manage them.

Which is why what can feel most helpful and healing, is to learn a new way of self-witnessing.

To see ourselves not through the eyes that judged us, but through ones that are genuinely curious about what’s actually there.

If you’re looking to be supported and held in a private container, book an Alignment Call using the link in my bio.

Thank you for being You ✨

Spending time on farms, talking to people in the fields, understanding how they see the world, always cracks something o...
18/03/2026

Spending time on farms, talking to people in the fields, understanding how they see the world, always cracks something open in me.

What strikes me most is the quality of consciousness they bring to every decision. Who benefits from this. Who suffers. What is the systemic impact of this choice.

Suddenly we see how we’re so intricately connected to the larger ecosystem.

And yet many of us never bring this quality of consideration into our personal relationships.

We like to think of ourselves as individuals. Self contained. Autonomous.
But we are never really functioning alone. Every dynamic we participate in leaves a mark.

And most of us can’t bear to sit with that. Because the moment we start asking those questions, we are forced to confront something we would rather not see in ourselves.

That we too have extracted and exploited because of our fears and lack.

Because somewhere along the way we learned that holding onto what we have, our image, our position, our sense of being enough, mattered more than honestly seeing what our relating was costing the people around us.

That we too have, at times, kept someone, or ourselves, small because that smallness served us in ways we never stopped to examine.

That’s not a comfortable place to stand.
But I think it’s the only honest place to start.

Share what came up for you in the comments below 👇

Desire is the fuel through which we get to intimately create from and interact with Life. But for many of us, desire was...
15/03/2026

Desire is the fuel through which we get to intimately create from and interact with Life.

But for many of us, desire was never safe.

We learned early that expressing what we truly wanted meant risking disappointment, rejection, being told we were too much or too selfish.

So we repressed it. We traded our vitality for social acceptance. We became very good at being what others needed us to be.

Until the weight became too heavy for our bodies and souls to bear.

And we realised that the life we were living had quietly become an illusion.

A series of obligations we were simply abiding by.
A performance of responsibility that had no room for us in it.

When we abandon ownership of our own desires, we unconsciously hand that responsibility to others.

We look to them to direct us, to tell us what to do, to make the choices and face the aftermath we are afraid if we would assume responsibility.

And then we resent them for it. We see them as controlling, suffocating, boring. When really what we are sitting with is the grief of our own life force that we never trusted ourselves to embody.

So if you’re seeing yourself in this, here’s a question to sit with:

If you could let go of what you’re ‘supposed’ to be or do, what do you truly desire to create or experience in your life?

Even if it doesn’t make any ‘sense’, don’t dismiss it entirely.
Learn to negotiate with it. To sit and give space to how Life wishes to unfold itself through you.

And notice how you’re feeling in your body as you give yourself the permission to reconnect with your Desire.

Let me know in the comments below what came up for you 👇

When we relate to dreams symbolically, we stop asking,“What does this mean?”And start asking,Why does this symbol move m...
04/03/2026

When we relate to dreams symbolically, we stop asking,
“What does this mean?”

And start asking,

Why does this symbol move me?
What aspect of myself is being mirrored here?
Where have I disowned or suppressed this quality in waking life?

This is the work we will explore in the 7 Day Dream Experiment which starts on 30 March.

Comment “dream” and I will send you a link with more information.

23/02/2026

I was learning how to cook.

And every time I got to a part that wasn't quite right — my mum would step in. Take over. Do it properly. The way it should be done.

She meant well. I know that.

But what I was quietly internalizing was this:
Someone better will always take over anyway. So why bother trying.

And underneath that — I could never quite meet the correct standard.

Something was always done wrongly.

So I told her,

What I actually needed wasn't for someone to take over. I needed to be shown a different way. Then given space to practice until it became second nature.

That's how learning lands in my body.

But then I saw something else. Her stepping in wasn't just about me.

I saw how she struggled to sit with the mess, thinking it was her fault. Her responsibility to pick up.

I represented her shadow of imperfection she needed to quickly correct — because she carried a story of needing to always be efficient and responsible for everything.

The following week I heard the same pattern in session.

A woman carrying quiet contempt for a man who struggled with simple decisions. Unable to meet her expectations.

A man carrying a story of passivity — his system long ago concluded that trying only leads to being faulted.

And underneath both of them — something tender and true.

She longed to finally let go of having to hold everything together. But was afraid that if she did, she'd be the one blamed when things fell apart.

He genuinely wanted to step up and expand. But kept being seen in his smallness before he had the chance.

So much of who we are is shaped by what we were never allowed to be.

The parts we hid. The trying we abandoned. The needs we stopped voicing because it felt safer not to.

And we carry those stories into every relationship. Every dynamic. Until we finally have the courage to support one another in creating a new story.

So here's something for you to think about...

What part of you stopped trying because it never felt safe enough to get it wrong?

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