Bizimana Theoneste

GREAT ANNOUNCEMENT ‼️‼️

FOOTBALL VS S£X

1. Going to ur boyfriend or Girlfriend's house without being invited = Offside😂💔😂

2. Dating a girl today and having s€x on the same day = Free kick😂💔😂

3. Condom = Defender😂💔😂

4. Abortion = Red card😂💔😂

5. Condom breaks = Penalty😂💔😂

6. A girl with a lot of energy = Captain😂💔😂

7. Having s€x without a condom = Own goal😂💔😂

8. Taking a lot of time without c^ming = Man of the match😂💔😂

9. S€xing three girls in one day = Hat trick😂💔😂

10. Having s£x with ur Ex = Friendly match😂💔😂

11. Eight years of s£x without getting a child = Arsenal😂😂💔😂😂

12. After two rounds and u request for more = Extra time😃😃

13. Taking it gently when having s£x = Fair play😆

14. Biting ur girlfriend's ni***es = Suarez😜😁

15. Two legs on the shoulder as if u are changing pampers = Throwing🤩😅

16. Asking her "how do u want it?" = Taking instructions from the touchline😂💔

17. A lady using pills after s£x and later she still gets pregnant = Defensive error
😃😆😜
18. A girl getting pregnant = Goooooal😜😁🤩

19. Having s£x with ur girlfriend and ur mum opens the door = Injury😂💔😂

20. A guy who impregnated the lady = Active striker😂😃

21. A girl telling u to stop = yellow card😂💔😂

22. You and ur girlfriend break up in ur love relationship = Game over

Follow JMW the Blogger

Lionel Messi has been crowned the GOAT by Marca 🐐🤝

Ikinyamakuru MARCA gikorera i Madrid kiri mu bitangazamakuru bikomeye ku isi cyemeje ko ku isi ya RUREMA, Lionel Andrés “Leo” MESSI ari we mukinnyi ukomeye wabayeho ku ISI muri ruhago.

NUMBER 1… 🥇

ANDIKAHO 1 🥇🔥 NIBA WEMERA NUMBER 1… ❤️

betPawa Rwanda

Dstv Rwanda

B&B Kigali 89.7FM

Ronaldo's trophies since the summer of 2021:
1x Arab Cup (Preseason friendly)

Messi's trophies since summer of 2021:
1x FIFA World Cup
2x Copa America
1x Finalissima
2x Ligue 1
1x French Super Cup
1x MLS Suppporters' Shield
1x Leagues Cup

Player who scored most goals in history:-
1. 🇵🇹 Cristiano Ronaldo ( 900 )✅
2. 🇦🇷 Lionel Messi (833)
3. 🇦🇹 Joseph Bican (805)

Player with most assists in history: [Opta assists only]
1. 🇦🇷 Lionel Messi (363)✅
2. 🇭🇺 Ferenc Puskas (359)
3. 🇳🇱 Johan Cruyff (358)

Player with most dribbles in history: [from 2006–07 season by Opta]
1. 🇦🇷 Lionel Messi (2,358)✅
2. 🇧🇪 Eden Hazard (1,285)
3. 🇨🇵 Franck Ribery (1,061)

Most France Football Ballon d'Or winners in history:
1. 🇦🇷 Lionel Messi (8)✅
2. 🇵🇹 Cristiano Ronaldo (5)
3. 🇳🇱 Johan Cruyff (3)

Most FIFA The Best award winning players in history:
1. 🇦🇷 Lionel Messi (8)✅
2. 🇵🇹 Cristiano Ronaldo (5)
3. 🇨🇵 Zinedine Zidane (3)

Most Golden Ball awardee in FIFA World Cup history:
1. 🇦🇷 Lionel Messi (2)✅
2. 🇦🇷 Diego Maradona (1)
3. 🇩🇪 Oliver Kahn (1)

Most European Golden Boot holders in history:
1. 🇦🇷 Lionel Messi (6)✅
2. 🇵🇹 Cristiano Ronaldo (4)
3. 🇺🇾 Luis Suarez (2)

Player with most MOTMs in history: [Domestic League + Champions League from 2009-10 season]
1. 🇦🇷 Lionel Messi (318)✅
2. 🇵🇹 Cristiano Ronaldo (168)
3. 🇸🇪 Zlatan Ibrahimovic (116)

Players with the most IFFHS World's Best Playmaker Awards in history:
1. 🇦🇷 Lionel Messi (5)✅
2. 🇪🇦 Xavi Hernandez (4)
3. 🇧🇪 Kevin De Bruyne (3)

Player with most International Player of the Tournament awards in history:
1. 🇦🇷 Lionel Messi (7)✅
2. 🇺🇾 Jose Nasaji (3)
3. 🇧🇷 Pele Arantes (2)

Players with the most trophies in history:
1. 🇦🇷 Lionel Messi (44)✅
2. 🇧🇷 Dani Alves (43)
3. 🇪🇦 Andres Iniesta (37)

Player with most individual awards in history:
1. 🇦🇷 Lionel Messi✅
2. 🇵🇹 Cristiano Ronaldo
3. 🇧🇷 Ronaldo Nazario

Has any player dominated football like Messi? 🗿🥵
Ronaldo's goal record will be broken soon.🇦🇷💪⚽️

Remember the name Greatest Leo Messi 👑

This is messi's trophy cabinet without Barcelona 🇦🇷🐐

Remove goals from Messi and you'll have assist

Remove assist you'll have Man of the match awards

Remove Man of the match awards and you'll have most trophies in football history

Remove trophies and you'll have most Balond'ors

Remove Balond'ors and you'll have most FIFA best player

Remove FIFA best player you'll have the most European golden boot

Remove European golden boot and you'll have Laliga most assist

And so on and so forth that we can mention but there's no space

Remove goals from Cristiano Ronaldo's career and you'll see prime Antony that with the football peak of Jesse Lingard and the Tapin Techniques of Lukaku

Messi might just get annoyed and Equalise Ronaldo's 901 goals in 2 games 😂😂

I mean no disrespect but how on earth is these a debate🤔 how is messi compared to Ronaldo
I mean stats aside as a player Ronaldo is no where near the player Messi is

Greatest goal scorers of our generation
1.ronaldo
2.messi

Greatest passers
1.messi
Ronaldo not in the conversation

Greatest playmakers
1.messi
Ronaldo not in the conversation

Greatest dribblers
1.messi
Ronaldo not in the conversation

Players with the most goal contribution
1.messi
2.ronaldo

Players with great vision or football iq
1.messi
Ronaldo not in the conversation

U can love Ronaldo over messi but comparing them as complete players is an insult to messi🥶

Players with more key passes created
1.Messi

Players with more chances created in champions leage or world cup or for the league
1.Messi

It's a hard pill for ronaldo fans to accept but true🥶

His carrer is so great but too stupid in front of messi

He has Most goals but the most golden Boot winner is messi

He has played more matches but messi has the most man of the match

He has more nomination in the balloon dor but messi has the most balloon dor

He has played more season but messi has the most trophies in football history

He is older but messi behaves more matured than him

He has more international goals but messi has more international best player award than him

He has more international appearance but messi has more international trophy than him

The worst thing that have ever happened to Ronaldo is for him to play in messi era,even in his next life he will never wish to rival a player like messi

Note:Copied credit to the owner.

The Greatest Of All Time😭❤️🐐

Really this talkative guy deserves this

Kiekiekiekkiekiekiekiekieki

🚨 History will remember Lionel Messi as:

- A World Cup champion.
- A two-time World Cup Golden Ball recipient.
- A four-time International Player of the Tournament.
- An eight-time Ballon d'Or winner.
- The most decorated footballer in history.

Cristiano Ronaldo, on the other hand, will be noted for:

- His Instagram followers.
- His YouTube subscribers.
- Dating a celebrity.

There are levels to this game.