Whitney K Coaching

"I'm missing out"

This is one of the most common thoughts people have just before they start partaking in something they told themselves they wouldn't partake in.

And it's really a totally ridiculous thought. What does missing out even mean? We are technically ALWAYS missing out on something because we can only do one thing at a time.

As an example, if I take a trip to Europe, I'm technically missing out on a trip to New Zealand.

But who chooses to go Europe and agonizes over missing out on a trip to New Zealand? No one, because they are in Europe and Europe is amazing!

There is an opportunity cost to every decision we make. We know this and are generally okay with this. Until it comes to food.

When everyone at work is eating a donut or Halloween candy all you can think about is what you are missing out on.

What you have to remember is that there is always another side to the "missing out" coin. If you do eat the candy, what will you miss out on?

Maybe you'll miss out on being hungry for your lunch, or maybe you'll miss out on feeling good because your stomach is upset after the candy. Maybe you'll miss out on that little confidence boost that comes from sticking to your guns.

So next time you are making a choice DO NOT focus on all the things you are missing out on. Focus on all the things you get by not partaking.

This way you aren't really missing out at all. You're getting something really amazing like a healthy body and lots of energy.. or a trip to Europe or something ;)

⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣

⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣

I have a three-year-old and a one-year-old. My three-year-old is jumping around and doing all kinds of acrobatics. My one year-old has just started to pull himself up and stand while holding onto furniture. There is never a point that I look at my one year old and think he’s an idiot because he’s not jumping around and running yet. And I would bet big money that my one year-old also doesn’t look at my three-year-old and think “I’m so dumb I should already be running by now”.

But somewhere along the way, we start comparing our beginning to other people’s endings, and this is so not helpful. In fact this type of thinking usually slows our own progression. Instead of actually doing something, we are just busy seeing how we measure up to everyone else.

Stop thinking you should be somewhere else or that you should be better than you are. You are supposed to be where you are right now. There is a natural progression to everything.

You’re never going to look back on your life and think what an idiot you were for not accomplishing a goal fast enough.
So give yourself a break, and keep at those goals. This is exactly where you are supposed to be.

⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣

In the past when I've traveled I've just kind of given myself allowance for the day to not eat plant based. Maybe I'd bring
some nuts and an apple, but I would plan on eating a meal in the airport.

I just thought that traveling just has to kind of be one of those exceptions and it wasn't a huge deal - you have to do what you have to do.

I still don't think it's a big deal and that you do "have to do what you have to do", but I was thinking about traveling from a more curious standpoint.

I was wondering if maybe I could actually eat plant based while traveling all day.

Then this was my thought process:

- What if we just brought food other than nuts and an apple with us?
- But I'd need to keep it cold
- When we go to the beach we just bring a cooler
- Well why couldn't we just bring a cooler?
- I even have a bag I could take because that would be smaller and easier
- It's still pretty big though
- It would be awesome if I could get a smaller version that wouldn't take up so much space
- … like a lunchbox.

Now I'll admit that I laughed out loud when I got to this extremely simple conclusion for something I thought was totally impossible 5 minutes earlier.

But this is what happens when we tell ourselves it's impossible. We just stop thinking about it, and therefore prove that it's impossible.

But what if instead we opened ourselves up to the idea that it might be possible? We might be able to find a solution? Then our brain starts working to find answers - and it might end up that it's super simple.. like a lunchbox 😂

So you may think I'm a total moron for not thinking of a lunchbox like 5 years ago (and you might be right!), but trust me - this works.

Put this to the test next time you're faced with a problem that you think has no solution.

⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣

When we are at the beginning of a goal the excitement is palpable - we are taking a lot of action to reach our goal, but inevitably the excitement wears off and we don't want to keep going.

This happens to everyone because our brains want us to conserve energy and keep doing the things we already know how to do.

Going after a goal takes a lot of effort and usually involves a lot of figuring out how to do things. Our brain doesn't want us to put a lot of effort in. It doesn't want us to do hard things. It wants everything to be easy.

But we have made these big goals for a reason. When we made the goal we knew we wanted the end result enough to keep going even when the excitement wore off.

So plan on wanting to quit in advance. Because you will for sure want to quit.

And decide in advance to keep going anyways.

⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣

How many times have you started a new way of eating or any new habit for that matter and said that you are now going to do this forever.

I don't know about you, but my brain immediately goes into problem finding mode and I find all kinds of reasons why I can't create a new habit forever.

I think of ridiculously specific situations that will stop me.

And then I use it as a reason to be overwhelmed and make myself feel better with an Oreo.

What if instead of imagining everything that could go wrong in the next 10 years, you only think about today - or this morning for that matter.

You can do anything for one day.

What can you do today to ensure you keep your new habit for today?

What kind of obstacles may you run into today?

What can you do in advance to prepare?

What emotions do you need to be willing to experience? (maybe an unanswered urge for sweets or discomfort)

Don't worry about how you're ever going to be able to keep this up in the long run (so not helpful).

Just experience today.

One day at a time adds up a lot quicker than you think.

⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣

Your old brain always looks to the past. Your new brain is in your future where you have already accomplished your goals.

Who would you rather listen to?

⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣

We tend to get really dramatic about bad days.

We make it mean that something has gone terribly wrong with us.

Or that the progress that we thought we had made has been lost.

But really it's probably just because you haven't taken much time to take care of yourself lately.

And taking care of your mental and emotional health is something that needs to be done daily.

You don't go to a workshop for a week and then think that your brain is "fixed" forever.

You have to do ongoing maintenance on your brain if you want to maintain the results you've achieved and especially if you want to progress.

So don't make bad days mean there is something wrong with you. It might just be time to take care of you.

And what's the best way to take care of you and your brain?

Well, my totally biased answer is: coaching.

If you don't have one get one

[insert clip of Woody telling everyone to get a moving buddy - I can't help myself]

⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣

How many times have you thought "I'm totally out of control"? It seems like you don't even know how you just ate that entire bag of chips. One minute you saw the chips and the next you were on the couch pouring the crumbs into your mouth.

In your mind, chips have some kind of power that causes you to eat an entire bag - you don't have any control of it.

But really there are a lot of steps in between seeing chips and an entire bag being eaten.

Bought the chips at the grocery store
Saw the chips in the pantry
Grabbed the bag
Opened the bag
Walked over to the couch
Sat down on the couch
Ate one chip
Ate another chip
Ate another chip….

A lot of this is so automated we don't think about it, but there is no way that a bag of chips could make you do all those things.

Right? It's all you. So don't give all your power away to a bag of chips.

You get to decide exactly what you want to eat and do every day. Isn't that amazing? You are totally in control.

Maybe you'll decide to eat an apple instead. Or maybe you still want to eat the bag of chips. Either way is totally fine. And either way you have the power to do whatever you want.

⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣

Food isn't the enemy. You do not need to feel shame over food.

Food is not good or bad - your body simply responds differently to foods.

That's all.

It's very factual.

But a lot of us create a lot of drama around food.

For example:

After eating a roll of Oreos, you might make that mean that you have no self-control. Or that something is wrong with you.

See what just happened there? You became the enemy with all the negative self-talk.

But guess what? There is nothing wrong with you. It's natural for our bodies to crave sugar - the dopamine response that is produced when we eat a cookie makes our bodies think that the more sugar we have, the better chance of survival we have.

This is science. It doesn’t mean you are flawed as a person.

You are just a person whose body is working how it's supposed to work.

So please be kinder to yourself. Be your own friend. Be your own biggest supporter. When you eat Oreos that you weren't planning to eat - don't make it mean anything about you.

You are amazing and your body is amazing - food can't change that. The scale can't change that.

⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣

Do you want to be healthier without turning your life upside down?

You can.

And it’s easier than you think.

One of the smallest changes that will have the biggest impact on your health is eating a salad every day.

So rather than radically changing your diet overnight, why not join me in this Salad Challenge?

I will teach you:

✅Why eating salad every day is so important
✅ How to build your salads to maximize nutrition and weight loss
✅ My favorite practical tips for eating salads every day

I will also be offering daily live coaching. This means you can bring any struggles directly to me so we can figure out how you can best reach your goals.

Also, I will be shocked if you don’t lose weight. So shocked that I will give you a full refund if you don’t.

This is 5 days of daily calls, you are guaranteed to lose weight, and it costs $19.

Last question: Why haven’t you already signed up? 😆

See you March 22!

Follow the link in my bio to sign up.

Whitneykcoaching.com/saladchallenge/

⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣

Let's take a step back and recognize that everything you are saying you "have" to do is not necessary. Every single thing you do during the day is a choice. You don't have to do anything.

Now this might feel false. After all you "have" to work to be able to pay for your mortgage and buy groceries. Not true.

You could not work. Now you may decide that you WANT to work so you can continue living in your home and so you can eat. But you still don't HAVE to.

There is a subtle shift when you realize that everything you do during the day is because you want to for one reason or another. Rather than being at the effect of all the things, you are actually deciding that you want to do all the things.

When I first started getting coached I was working long hours as a corporate accountant. I told my coach that I had to work long hours - my job required it.

She told me that wasn't true.

Excuse me? No really, I HAVE to work super long hours at my job.

Then she told me that I wanted to work long hours.

Say what?

I came to realize that she was right. I did want to work long hours - because I wanted a promotion. I wanted to impress my boss.

Let's say that I would have gotten fired if I didn't work those extra hours. It's still a choice. If I wanted to, I could have refused to work extra and gotten fired. That was totally an option for me.

Just realizing that you want to do the things you do each day gives you all the power back - don't let your job or anything hold that much power over you. You are in control of your life and you get to feel any way you want in any circumstance.

So what are the things in your life that you tell yourself you have to do? Do you have to?

⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣
⁣