Ugwuja Chisom Michelle

Till tomorrow,
I can't understand the concept of advising someone to continue living in an abusive marriage.

What's the need of staying if things are not going normal again. Do you enjoy getting beaten and insulted? Shey na till dey burn you?

And this woman said, it's for my children (clown 🤡). Your children are going to still live without you if you die in that marriage.
Besides you're even doing more harm than good to those children. When your daughter grows up she'll think it's normal to have such marriage, your son will be expecting someone's daughter to pass through what you suffered, because you stayed.

The one that pained me most... Is the father of the woman 🤦
You see what is happening to your daughter and you're advocating her to go back because of what the society will say, may the society die ten times😏

He even said, "bend your rules and save the marriage, kneel down and beg him if you have to"
For marriage wey don end since? Lol, the marriage ended the day your daughter was beaten black and blue sir, it can't be saved.

Learn to walk away, anything that abuses your mental health, physical health, peace of mind and growth, my dear take a walk.

When you die the society will still say, why didn't she leave? The society will always say something.

The most embarrassing thing I've witnessed in my life, is for a man to be called by his in-laws to bring car or bus that will carry your daughter and her properties back to your house 🤦l

Learn to walk away please, you deserve peace. You signed papers not life sentence.

I won't talk about toxic relationships today, make una enjoy una Valentine's day very well 😅

A divorce is actually the greatest gift Tuface could ever give Annie, because Annie could never muster the strength to exit that relationship herself and the relationship has always been TOXIC from the word go.

What Annie wants? Tuface never had to give to her, and in fairness to him, there was never any pretence about it..

Tuface IS NOT a monogamous man. There are 3 women on record who have had babies for this man. (ie Sumbo, Pero & Annie) and he was never faithful to any one of them.

So cheating is not something peculiar Tuface was doing to Annie. Nope!! He has cheated on her as he has cheated on others with her..

■Tuface is just NOT the marrying type. It is written in stone.🤷‍♀️

He showed this to not just her but every woman he has been with UNEQUIVOCALLY, year after year, that he could never be with anyone exclusively..but Annie kept fighting relentlessly..

Annie was a 28yr old adult, when she married Tuface and at the point of that marriage, Tuface already had 5kids from 2 different women.

5 whole kids!!!!😳 F.I.V.E!!!!

A 28yrs old woman, opened her 2 eyes and used her 2 legs to walk into a marriage with a man who had 5 kids from 2 baby mamas, and all but the 1st child were wrapped up in cheating narratives..

Even Annie had equally snuck in her own 1 kid in the mix, cheating with Tuface while he was with Sumbo who was his "Live in Lover" at the time.

So at the point of his marriage to Annie, Tuface had 6 kids.

Check this out - Annie had her 1st baby with Tuface in Dec, 2008. She was 24yrs old at this time.

But note that prior to Annie's own delivery:
■ In this same year (ie 2008) Sumbo was still living with Tuface as his wife-to-be and she just had a baby with him in April of 2008; and
■then Pero who was also sneaking around with Tuface had her own baby the immediate next month (ie May of that same 2008),
and
■then Annie popped up as well and went on to have her own baby with Tuface in December of that same 2008.

Can you see what was going on here?

This was always a classic case of survival of the fittest amongst multiple baby mamas and a competition of which one of us will use our womb to keep this man.

It was obvious that whatever Annie desperately needed from Tuface, it was never there to start with - it was always a smoke screen.

But she continued to lie to herself that she could make him what she wanted him to be..and she wanted to 🏆 WIN so badly.. She wanted that title of (WIFE) so badly, she needed to OWN the man...to prove a point..

Sadly, the problem is that you can never make anybody what you want them to be....

People will always be who they want to be..

If you want to be with someone, find out what they want, as you are doing what you want. If what they want alligns with what you want, you can be together and work together..And if what they want is not what you want... Go your separate ways...

Nobody needs to sacrifice what they want for what you want to keep you happy..

Tuface has always been clear about what he wants.... To live free, with a wandering preeque throughout the universe.. You don't have to like it, but it is what he wants..

And if we are being honest with ourselves, these women dealing with him were not too young to clock that...

Credit: Esiri ochuko uduaghan

The way kids mature these days ehh, you'll be wondering if they're feeding on fertilizer, especially girls.

To the boys, abeg be asking their age. Most of them look so matured compared to their age. Nobi everybody wey carry back and front don grow.

I remember when I greeted one girl I saw on the street, coz I thought she's older than me. The next day I saw her wearing school uniform and she called me aunty 😱 You can imagine my shock 😂

This morning, I saw a group of girls going to school,

If they weren't wearing uniform, I could have sworn we are age mates 😂
And that's how one brother will see them on the road and be asking them out, they might even lie about their age because they can pass as adults.

Please!!!! Before person go tag you pe*****le, confirm her age.
Good morning 🌞

May I sip my juice first, dey wait who no go hear word🌝😂

This used to be my favorite spot in this compound. As you can see it's not looking like the best place to find comfort.
It's the guava tree that attracted me. I'll always go to look for anyone to pluck. Children from other compounds will come and surround the tree. There was a time that you'll always meet someone at this spot.

I went to my aunt's house and the guava tree in their compound is still producing fruit. There were ripe ones on the branches, and I even spotted some new ones growing.

But this one, has no fruits again. I stopped going there, people stopped coming around. It's now deserted and lonely.

Thinking about this, it's also applicable to human life.

There are two moral lessons in this story.

The first one is for you to understand that there's a reason for everything.
Just like the two guava trees. One is still producing fruits, the other is not.
You might have the same goal with someone, have the same potentials with someone and the person is excelling more than you.
That doesn't mean he/she is better than you are. It means your time is yet to come.
It could be that the person has better opportunities and better support system.

Your time is yet to come. I sincerely hope you don't give up🫂❤️

The second lesson, is about your circle. The people you surround yourself with.

Just like the guava tree that has people flocking around it when it had fruits and was abandoned because it stopped producing fruits.

You need people of quality around you. That when you start lacking sauce, when it's looking like you're loosing your oil, they will stay. They won't abandon you like I did to that tree instead they become a great source of support.

Surround yourself with quality people. Writing this I realized there are 3 lessons actually.

The third lesson is, Add value to yourself.
You attract quality people when you have something to offer. Learn more, grow your mindset.
When you have something of value, people will flock to you. That even when it's looking like you're failing, there'll be a reason to support you. It can be, let's stay with him/her in this trial period, we need him and he needs us.
I stopped going to that tree because I can have another fruit to substitute for it.
I went back today coz I need something from it. Which is to take a picture and make this post.

*Grow your mindset, that's one way to attract quality people.*

Tell me why two guys will be holding hands and be walking on the road, when none of them is sick or blind 😒😂
It was a long walk and they held hands till we went our separate direction.

Me I like gist, I took a picture first and walked up to them to start a chit chat(amebo mode activated 😂)

While reading the book KEEP IT SHUT.
A lot of things stood out to me, the power of our tongues can't be underestimated. You should know when to speak, how to speak and the right words to use.
One thing I loved about this book, it's not only teaching you morals. It teaches you the ways of the Lord too.

When there are many words, sin is unavoidable, but the one who
controls his lips is wise.” (10:19 HCSB)
• “Do you see a man who speaks too soon?
There is more hope for a fool than for him.” (29:20 HCSB)
• “The one who gives an answer before he listens — this is
foolishness and disgrace for him.” (18:13 HCSB)
• “Even fools are thought wise if they keep silent, and discerning if
they hold their tongues.”

** Don’t speak too much.
Don’t speak too soon.
Don’t speak without first listen

** Ponder what the other person said and perhaps go on a fact-findingmission.

I loved this book, I learnt from it. I hope you learn and practice it too♥️♥️

If I had a dollar for every time my mouth got me into trouble, I could pay to
have it surgically shut.

At some point in our lives, I am betting that every one of us has thought,
“Why, did I just say that?”

Words are the most powerful weapons we have. They can be a sharp sword
or a soothing salve, both having the ability to change someone’s path in an
instant. Our words have the power to build up or to destroy. It’s no wonder that the
Bible compares the tongue to both forest fires and swords.
It's not a boring book, it has stories that will make you laugh and learn. So, you might need a popcorn to read it.
This is my second book...
What's yours?

I'll be dropping the reviews and lessons from each book I read, let's learn and grow together.

Today, when I was preparing to go out with my second mummy.
She wanted to put stuffs in the car booth, so I tried opening it. She said I should not bother that there's a small problem with the booth. Then she came and opened it herself.
When we got to our destination, for us to bring things out from the booth, I tried opening it but it wasn't opening. Then I remembered she said I can't do it, I just left it for her.

When we were leaving, there was need to go to the booth.
I went there, I tried opening it it wasn't opening.
I was like, *is it not the booth that this woman will just come and open like it's nothing. Why will it be hard for me?*
Then I tried one more time and it opened. I closed it back and opened it again. I was happy I was able to open it.

I realized that that's how our mind works.

When they tell you you can't do this, you can't do that. And you start believing you can't do it. No matter how hard you try, you can't get it right.

Until you condition your mind that you can do it, then you'll see yourself getting every step right.

There's nothing you put your mind on that you can't achieve.

That work you want to apply for and you're skeptical about it, go for it. You deserve it♥️

That position you're want to contest for, go baby. You're qualified ♥️

That content you want to start creating, that business you want to start, that thing you have in mind to do, just start, you will Excel♥️

It's all about mindset, grow your mindset and watch yourself Excel beyond your thoughts 🥰

I'm rooting for you 🌹🥰

I remember when the holy rosary was like my sleeping pills. Anytime I feel like sleeping and sleep is far from me, I'll go get my rosary and just like that I'll sleep off while praying.
When my mum wakes us up for morning devotion, and we will say the holy rosary that morning. Believe me when I say my mum will be tapping me in between the prayers to wake up. I once got a training where we say the rosary every Monday morning. Lol .. I don't look forward to Monday morning coz I see it as a tiring morning.
Fast forward to when I started being intentional about praying.
I heard many testimonies people got from the holy rosary, I started trying to learn how to be consistent with saying my rosary but it wasn't easy.
I remember my godfather saying it's the devil distracting me. Coz I no longer sleep but I still get tired of it
I kept trying till I gave up and said it's not everything that is about the rosary.
I went with that narrative that everything is not about the rosary. It was not until I had a major problem in my life that I took my rosary. Nobody asked me to, it just came to my mind. I held my rosary like my life depended on it and for the first time in years, I said my rosary without sleeping or getting tired.
And fr it worked, it worked like magic.
After that day, I believed the power in the holy rosary.
But it didn't stop me totally from getting tired of the rosary.

Recently I had a problem. My godfather called, I think my mum told him cos I didn't. He said, *"you're no longer praying". When was the last time you said your rosary?*
Omo, me sef I couldn't remember because it's been long.
He said I should say my rosary for one Month regarding that particular problem that I had.
We are still in week two but the purpose of that prayer has been solved.
Like, I asked for water and I got rain.
You want a faster way to solve a problem? Hold your rosary. No matter how trivial that problem is😇