05/07/2026
Establishing a strong, lasting family is one of the most difficult and rewarding endeavours I have ever undertaken in this life. It demands patience, sacrifice, forgiveness, and unwavering commitment. Once built, it must be guarded jealously, not with suspicion or isolation, but with wisdom and fierce loyalty.
Let me speak plainly from experience: one of the greatest threats to any marriage is often the very people you consider friends. What begins as casual conversation or well-meaning advice can quietly plant seeds of doubt and discontent. They highlight flaws, amplify minor grievances, and create wedges where none existed. You listen, you internalize their opinions, and before long, separation follows. Then the painful irony unfolds: you watch as your former partner moves on, and suddenly you find yourself exhibiting the very behaviours you accused him/Her of. The cycle repeats, leaving behind broken homes, wounded hearts, and children caught in the middle.
It is only after the dust settles that many realise a profound truth: no marriage is perfect. Every union has its seasons of struggle, misunderstanding, and fatigue. The difference between marriages that endure and those that dissolve often lies not in the absence of problems, but in the refusal to let outsiders define or dismantle what belongs solely to the two of you.
My honest advice is this: never take counsel from others about the inner workings of your marriage. Friends and family may mean well, but they do not carry the full weight of your reality. They did not court your spouse. They did not make the sacrifices, build the life, or stand through the storms that brought you together. They were not there for the private promises exchanged between just the two of you. Therefore, they should not have the power to tear it apart.
Protect your marriage like the sacred treasure it is. Seek guidance only when necessary from trusted mentors (and not from people like bata Kiengei) or professionals who respect the institution and have a proven track record of strengthening unions, never from those who speak casually about what they have never laboured to build.
Your marriage is your responsibility, your legacy, and your battlefield. Fight for it. Nurture it. And above all, keep it yours.