Arwa S. Rajgarhwala

It's important to understand that 'Manipulation' is a coping mechanism. When a person is not been taught 'healthy' ways to ask for their needs to be met, they attempt to take control of the other person because they believe that's their only chance of having those needs met.

Healthy people can deal with other people's 'no' and respect their choices.

Manipulation in families can be unconscious (they aren't aware that they are doing so) and can be passed from generation to generation.

To stop this you need to set boundaries.

Here's a reminder if you're facing emotional manipulation-
1. BOUNDARIES ARE FOR YOU- They're not to control other people but to protect your interest. You should follow them regardless of what other people think.

2. AVOID OVER EXPLANATION- Some people react aggressively when you draw a line. This might be a sign that they lack boundaries. Avoid over explaining. Breathe. Remove yourself from the situation for a while.

3. IT'S OKAY TO FEEL GUILTY- It's okay to feel guilty or think that you're selfish. If you've been conditioned in co-dependent home, you'll have lots of intense emotions and thoughts coming up. That's okay. Be kind to yourself.

4. Protect your own peace. Fixing other people's problem isn't your primary concern.

5. As you leave your role of a fixer you might feel sad. Give yourself time to grieve.

6. Remember, safe people want you to be the best version of yourself, even if it doesn't benefit them.

7. Safe people don't require you to 'prove' yourself, your love or your devotion.

8. A large part of manipulation involves making you question your reality and to not trust yourself. Healthy people trust themselves and therefore trust you.

Coz time isn't the main thing, it's the only thing⏳

Use your mind for thinking,
Not remembering!

Humans are wired to forget things and sometimes in all the work and pressure we forget the important things too.

Make your life easier by-
▪️Carrying a diary to journal important things
▪️Putting tasks in calendar
▪️Making a to-do list
▪️Setting reminders

A counsellor is a trained, objective professional with whom you can build a healing and trusting relationship. They are trained to offer different types of assistance; most frequently talk-based styles of therapy.

Counselling is a process of talking about and working through your personal problems with a counsellor. The counsellor helps you to address your problems in a positive way by helping you to clarify the issues, explore options, develop strategies and increase self-awareness. For some people, just the process of telling their story to a counsellor, and being listened to, is helpful.

A trained counsellor is someone trained to offer a talk-based therapy. There are many types of talk-based therapy. A counsellor may work in partnership with a medical doctor or other health professionals at times to give comprehensive and integrated care.

Counselling provides confidential support. This means that everything you discuss with the counsellor is private, between you and the counsellor.

Telling them to take a "chill-pill" doesn't really help.

Telling someone to “calm down” has never, ever made it happen. Those words are not magic and definitely not helpful. If the person experiencing anxiety had the ability to calm down in that moment, they’d absolutely do it. To someone with anxiety, this all-too-common phrase is patronizing and annoying.

Love yourself anyway 💖

There's a different way...
Worrying is such a distraction.. It pushes you towards overthinking-truly a waste of time, and/or how we create chaos (mind you, not the good kind).

Mental illness- still a taboo in our society.

There are already a lot of hardships in everyone's life. Let's not increase it by being mean to them. Show them some compassion, help them discover their strengths.
You may not even realise but you may be their twig while they are about to drown.

Not everyone will understand your choices and your journey. That's okay. You are here to live your life, not to make everyone understand.

SAD is a chronic mental health condition in which social interactions cause irrational anxiety.
For people with social anxiety disorder, everyday social interactions cause irrational anxiety, fear, self-consciousness and embarrassment.

⭕Emotional and Behavioral Symptoms-
🔸Fear of situations in which you may be judged negatively
🔸Worry about embarrassing or humiliating yourself
🔸Intense fear of interacting or talking with strangers
🔸Fear that others will notice that you look anxious
🔸Fear of physical symptoms that may cause you embarrassment, such as blushing, sweating etc.
🔸Avoidance of doing things or speaking to people out of fear of embarrassment
🔸Avoidance of situations where you might be the center of attention
🔸Anxiety in anticipation of a feared activity or event
🔸Intense fear or anxiety during social situations

⭕Physical Symptoms-
🔸Blushing
🔸Fast heartbeat
🔸Trembling
🔸Sweating
🔸Upset stomach or nausea
🔸Trouble catching your breath
🔸Dizziness or lightheadedness
🔸Feeling that your mind has gone blank
🔸Muscle tension
🔸Avoiding common social situations

⭕SAD obstructs everyday experiences like-
🔸Interacting with unfamiliar people or strangers
🔸Attending parties or social gatherings
🔸Going to work or school
🔸Starting conversations
🔸Making eye contact
🔸Dating
🔸Entering a room in which people are already seated
🔸Returning items to a store
🔸Eating in front of others
🔸Using a public restroom

Social anxiety disorder symptoms can change over time. They may flare up if you're facing a lot of changes, stress or demands in your life. Although avoiding situations that produce anxiety may make you feel better in the short term, but its likely to continue in long term if not treated.

😂

Value your time