A Space To Grow

Just had a lovely catch up with a returning parent. Supporting the child on their journey does not just happen in sessions.

My support is centred around the whole child and that support starts with the parents.

Parents are often struggling without appropriate support. Creating a space for them to feel heard, listening to the challenges they are faced with and understanding the child’s needs is the priority. This is how I personalise sessions.

This way we can all move forwards together.

The book I didn’t know I needed to read.

THE PARENT CARER by

As it’s I wanted to write a proper post about what it means to me to be a parent carer. It is a term I have really struggled to use for myself. It’s certainly not a role I ever expected. But it is a role I give my everything to, and will continue to do, as long as needed. There are so many important things to say, I don’t know where to start!

And then… oh yes…. aside from that, I’m currently drowning in an insurmountable load of administrative tasks, in a state of utter exhaustion, whilst caring for and educating both my children at home. So I’ll leave it there for now.

But onwards we go, and with this book under my belt, I feel heard and a lot less alone!

If you are a parent carer or you know a parent carer who is in need of validation and recognition for the complex, exhausting and undervalued role that is parent caring, then I strongly urge you to read this book. Thank you Natalie!!! 🙏❤️

Here is Harvey, our adolescent dog and the backbone of our family. He makes us all laugh daily, he notices our tears, he drives us around the bend, but he gives the best cuddles and we love him like he is one of us. He is also highly sensitive and requires a LOT of support and training, so fits right in! 😂

I’m no expert, but we’ve worked with dog trainers and done a lot of research online and much of what applies to Harvey is how I work with children. It all comes back to the nervous system.

I only move at Harvey’s pace. Pushing through just causes stress. If I can see his body signals showing overwhelm, we take a step back, we give him space, we let him sniff, we cut training short, we give him a rest. He loves calm music and he often just needs a really good run!

It’s the same with children. If I can see they are stressed or overwhelmed, we take a pause, I give them space, I support them to regulate. We don’t push through at all costs. We look at how we can lighten the load. And maybe they also just need a really good run! Movement is key.

For both dogs and children learning can’t happen without nervous system safety.

If we know that dogs need to regulate their nervous systems to be calm enough to learn, and we know that forcing them into busy, stressful environments without appropriate support can do more harm than good. Surely we can do this for our children?! 🤔

As SATS and the exam period descends, I thought I’d share a little poem I wrote a while back.

My two would be taking their SATs this year, and today, I am extremely grateful that their brains and bodies had other ideas for education.

I’m thinking of my nephew, their friends, children I work with and the many other children subjected to these pointless assessments. I hope their creativity survives and that their wonder and ability to dream are kept alive.

Sending love to all the families and school staff navigating the challenges this week may bring. ❤️🌱

Every day, but especially on the hard days, as a family we work on what our mind and bodies need to stay well.

🧘 Regulation
😴 Rest
🍱 Nutrition
🏃🏽 Movement

But as for many of you, our experience is not as clear-cut as this. There are many, many days that the need for regulation has superseded the need for nutrition. Frequently, the need for rest often means even the slightest movement is completely impossible.

There have been (and still are) many occasions when sweets, crisps and ice lollies for breakfast have been the only way forwards - something which might shock or even disgust many people. But if you know -you know! If this is you- you are not alone!

So dishing up wholesome breakfasts and ‘picky plates’ like this, and being able to experiment with matcha smoothies are colossal wins in this house. We’ve come a very long way. Listening to the boys talk about how nutritious food makes them feel better and how it helps them have energy, shows the real learning that is happening. Not because we are telling them, but because they are now feeling it for themselves.

The more we journey on this path, the more I am learning to trust the process. Autonomy, experience, opportunity and time are crucial to their ability to learn. It was hard to see this nearly 3 years ago.

So if you are in the midst of it all, here is a little proof that following their lead, giving space, opportunities and support, things can and will get better.

Trust the process.
Follow your gut.
Growing takes time! 🌱 x

A little hello and update from me (and Harvey 🐕 )!

I haven’t contributed anything lately…I just haven’t had the words. I often just delete my apps. And I often want to delete my account entirely!

I started this page because I wanted to feel useful and bring about change. I wanted to spread knowledge, understanding and kindness. Anything to help make this world a tiny bit better for our children!

But much of what is needed to be understood is impossible to share, because it is private. And so the thoughts fluctuate…

I give everything I can to the small number of children and families I am able to support. I am so grateful I still get to do this.

It is an isolating, painful journey when your family is failed by the system. A journey, which for us and for too many has become what feels like a new norm. Not a chosen path, but the only one available.

After over 3 years of navigating these systems, I am tired. I must always remind myself of the progress. We have come a long way. But articulating the complexities of getting to this point is beyond me.

This is our new norm.

We have our own rhythms that others might struggle to comprehend.

We have progress which others might struggle to see.

But we have safety.
We have agency.
We have connection and
we are slowly returning...

Our boys have shown us the way. They have shed so much light on what is wrong with our education system and on what is really needed. Guiding their journey is a privilege. I get to see the world through their eyes, which is magical.

I will stick around for now. The connection with like-minded people and witnessing the amazing work that so many of you are doing keeps me here.

So, if you got this far- thank you so much for being here! ❤️

And for anyone else navigating these horrific systems, I stand in solidarity with you! 🌱

Until the next time! Whenever that may be! 🤪

K x

Being a parent carer with both my boys currently learning at home is full on. It is hard finding ways of ‘being me’ and living outside of the parent carer role.

Helping and caring roles have been my bread and butter since I left university many moons ago. Helping children to thrive feeds my soul, and this is what I miss most about being a teacher. The fact that I am still managing to create space for children who are very much in need of support, alongside the chaos of my world means absolutely everything. 💓 ✨

My little (not little) assistant helping me box up tonight!

Double yokes for breakfast = doubling fun.

Spontaneous, fun and meaningful. The spark lights the fire and we can take it anywhere.

Finished off with some ‘eggsellent’ creativity! Most of our learning is on the go, conversational, spur of the moment. This is what works. This is meeting needs. This is how we learn. 🍳 🍳

needs

Slowly easing into 2026! One step at a time. Hope it brings hope, strength, magic and laughter for you all! ❄️ ❤️ ✨