It took me a long time to get here… because “acceptance” used to feel like settling.
Like staying stuck. Like accepting less for my life.
So I didn’t just dislike it. I avoided it.
But I’ve learned this: words change meaning depending on the context.
And in this context, radical self-acceptance doesn’t limit you, it creates the safety within you to expand.
To express the parts of you that never felt safe. To speak freely. To live without constantly needing approval.
I want to be clear. This isn’t about lowering your standards.
I’m all for growth. Expansion. Desires. More.
But self-rejection should not be the price you pay to get there. Shame doesn’t heal by chasing ideals.
And constantly searching for “more” can quietly make who you are right now feel like less.
We end up living in the future and missing ourselves in the present.
I want women to experience their desires from a place of wholeness not from the belief that they’re still not enough.
That’s why I’m devoted to radical self-acceptance. Not as a destination, but as a way of being.
For us. For our daughters. For the generations coming after us.
So if this resonates—share it.
Because the more women who give themselves permission to be enough right now, the less any of us compare, perform for approval, or have to carry this alone.
You are enough.
You have always been enough.
There is power in being Unashamedly You™️ 🧡
Shay Matthews - Self-Worth Coach and Holistic Psychotherapist
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Female Empowerment and Mindset - Transforming your limiting beliefs
23/03/2026
I’m still sitting with Saturday night 🤍
I didn’t take home the award, but being in that room as a finalist really meant something to me.
Something that started out as a personal journey of facing my own insecurities to accept myself and feel more confident, grew into a passion of helping other people move beyond theirs, and that's something Saturday gave me the space to feel truly proud of.
To be a finalist feels like such an honour and it's the journey of getting here and all the people I've had the privilege of supporting along the way that makes it mean even more.
Massive thank you to the , , .is.niqqi_m and the rest of the team for this moment. Being recognised in this way along with those simple words 'I see you' that you shared on Saturday meant the world.
And being part of a space where community and culture was seen and celebrated truly touched my heart. It's powerful beyond words. I felt inspired and encouraged.
To those I work with, thank you for trusting me with your journey. Seeing your lives change positively is what makes it all worthwhile and to those that have shown love, supported me and championed what I do, it means more than you know and I'm forever grateful.
Here's to helping more people, changing more lives and seeing just how far that can reach 💫
Most shame doesn’t come from doing something wrong.
It comes from moments where being yourself quietly cost you connection.
When you weren’t met.
When you felt misunderstood, rejected, or subtly corrected.
Your system learned an association: that authenticity = risk.
From there, an internal standard forms.
Not one you consciously chose—but one you’ve been measuring yourself against ever since.
How to be more lovable, less inconvenient, more acceptable.
How to act, what to hide, and what to emphasize in order to stay connected, chosen or loved.
This is why so many women feel disconnected from themselves while “doing all the right work.”
You’re still referencing a version of you that was shaped to preserve belonging, not your truth.
Over time, you stop asking Who am I?
and start asking What will keep me accepted?
But by working on your Self-Concept, it dissolves the standard you were never meant to live up to.
Question...
What part of you did you learn to edit in order to be accepted—and what would change if you stopped editing it?
They words were shared at the end of one single day.
Not after their lives had changed yet. Or after everything magically looked different.
Just after they gave themselves the space to slow down, drop in, and really meet themselves.
What you’re hearing isn’t “results.” It’s the moment something clicked. That feeling of, “Oh… this is what I’ve been carrying" or "This is why I am the way I am"
That sense of coming back to yourself, understanding your life, and finding peace in places you never thought you could.
This is what happens when we look at self-concept. Not as an idea, but as something you feel and live from every day.
Bigger shifts unfold after this.
In how you respond instead of react.
In how you stop abandoning yourself.
In how life starts to feel less heavy, less forced.
I’m sharing this because if something in you is whispering "Something needs to change", trust that starts with you.
Sometimes that first step won’t change everything you want in one moment.
But it changes the direction you’re moving in and what you're now headed towards.
And that matters more than you think 🤍
Massive thanks to .trowers .wellness and Joanne for your kind words 🫶🏾❤️
❤️ ❤️ ❤️
22/12/2025
I’m incredibly proud to have been shortlisted as a finalist at the 2026 Community, Corporate & Culture Awards
Being recognised among so many inspiring individuals and organisations making a real impact is truly an honour. Looking forward to celebrating this achievement in March.
The awards take place in London on Sat 21st March and are open to all. For anybody wanting to attend, you can purchase tickets at www.thecccawards.com - See you there! ❤️
The best news...thank you 🙏🏽💕
22/11/2025
I'm up for an award...eek in and your vote will help my contribution in the wellbeing space be recognised ✨️
Votes close Sunday at midnight and take less than a minute.
I'd love your support so please click the link in my BIO or my story if you haven't already.
All you need to do is put your name, email and then select Shay Matthews for the Health and Wellbeing Award and then submit vote.
Whether you've worked with me, seen me live, enjoyed my content or just love what I'm doing, thank you in advance. I appreciate your support 💓
14/11/2025
Last week I had the absolute pleasure of hosting One Team Away Day 🧡
Working together to help staff better support their own wellbeing.
It was so much fun introducing the teams to tools and techniques that can support them every day.
Plus giving snippets of my keynote 'Hiding in Plain Sight' around the struggles I overcame and how.
I loved facilitating sessions that showed the teams how quickly they can shift their perspectives, emotional state and mood in real time!
Then watching the renewed excitement and motivation in the room to work towards projects, goals and aspirations that minutes earlier felt a little out of reach.
Huge thanks to Mark, Katie, Sam and Catherine at Fresh Futures for inviting me to join forces and for sharing the positive feedback you've had so far already.
The work you do is life-changing so it was great to support your teams to feel the best they can, and be better equipped to keep up the incredible impact of their work 👏🏾
10/11/2025
Last weekend, I delivered one of my keynote talks 'The Invisible Cage' at the Speakers Showcase, led by and .
What an incredible experience and opportunity to share my message around self-concept and identity, the unconscious ways we form ours and the impact that has on our sense of belonging, freedom and expression of who we think we are.
Hearing from so many of the audience afterwards who resonated with my story, and felt curious to understand more, reminded me of the importance of this work; and of how more often than not, we are connected by similarity not difference and love that moments like Saturday help to bridge that gap.
I also had the pleasure of listening to so many other amazing speakers and left feeling totally inspired!
So huge thank you to the Self Made Family who have already supported me so much in immeasurable ways!
Excited to continue this journey even further and welcome enquiries should you be looking for a speaker for your next event ❤️