Karen Simpson - Mindset and Confidence Coach

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Home - Karen Simpson - Mindset and Confidence Coach I Am A Certified Mindset And Confidence Coach, And I Am Here Help Individuals Create A Relationship-Ready Mindset By Loving Themselves First.

Google review of Mindset and confidence coach by Donna Po***ck ★★★★★ "Having known and worked alongside Karen for nearly 7 years, I have to say she is an incredibly caring and supportive woman. I have had a number of mindset coaching sessions with her, to improve my confidence when seeking career development opportunities. She was very knowledgeable a...

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How To Build A Positive Mindset For Healthier Relationships?

Building relationships is an intrinsic part of human nature. Since evolution, we have been wired to connect with people around us, creating relationships and an emotional dependence system. And that is great, but in this process, we have forgotten the first and most important relationship we have to maintain and safeguard, is the relationship with ourselves and create a positive mindset to nurture other relationships in our lives.

In this article, we will be talking about how you can build a positive mindset for healthier relationships. We aim to recenter and find our inner self, which often suffers in the quest of finding love or a feeling of belongingness.

What Is Self?
Self is a true picture of You. It’s becoming aware of your positive and negative sides and accepting them with an open heart. But it doesn’t just stop there. You really have to look deep into yourself and explore the ways your personality has developed.

So, think about the things that you genuinely like and dislike about yourself. Then think about why that is the case. You’ll be surprised to find out that many of the habits that you’ve been trying to hide or avoid are the ones you picked up in your childhood. Because people often mirror the behaviours they learned subconsciously as a child into their adulthood.

Similarly, there will be things that your past relationships pushed onto you, which are now hindering you from reaching your potential in a relationship.

The concept of Self comes from unveiling every page of your life, including coming face to face with the dark side along with good characteristics. But realising these roadblocks is not an easy task. Here are a few ways you can create a positive mindset that fosters happy and healthy relationships.

Loving Yourself And Building Conscious Relationships
1. Paying Attention To Your Thoughts
Our thinking patterns weave core elements of our true personality, our response mechanism, and how we interpret things. Evidently, it is also our thought patterns that shape our unconscious mind and how we act in certain situations.

Most of the things that go through our minds are usually nothing more than a fragment of our imagination. Oftentimes, our responses are a result of a defence mechanism that is based on our past experiences. So, when we find ourselves in vulnerable situations, we allow our defences to take over.

The solution lies in differentiating between what’s real and what is merely a projection. So, set the clutter apart and only allow thoughts that may affect your decisions.

2. What Have You Attracted Thus Far?
We attract and choose our partners based on what we think about ourselves. So, take a moment and reflect on what you have attracted up until this moment.

If you’re feeling stuck in similar types of relationships that have been a source of stress, toxicity, and heartbreaks in your life, then it’s time to take a wider look at yourself. Besides, it is easy to blame others for the trauma we’ve been through, as it takes courage to look at ourselves with an unbiased lens and unfold our faults.

Learning why you attract a similar kind is key to understanding where you might be going wrong. Plus, determining how to minimise the friction in your future relationships and dealing with the problems with an open mind. Nobody is perfect, and neither are any relationships. The only thing that separates a doomed relationship and a healthy growing relationship is that you’ll be aware of what the obstacles might be and how to proactively deal with them.

3. What Do You Need in a Relationship?
The number one reason relationships fail is that the motive of getting into the relationship is not right. People follow the adrenaline rush they feel when meeting somebody interesting, which soon fizzles down. As a result, the charm dies, and the relationship ends. Successful relationships are based on compatibility and not simply hormonal rushes.

You can find compatibility when you know what you expect from a relationship, what you bring to the table, and how you would like your partner to be. Finding out what you want in a relationship will help you filter through people who may be seasonal and people who are genuinely good for you and for your self-esteem.

So, before you get into another relationship. Spend some time with yourself and write down your likings, dislikings, and things you can deal with in a relationship in three different columns. This way, you will have a clear idea about learning the important factors to have a successful relationship with the right person.

4. Discovering and dealing with unhealed wounds
Unhealed wounds are like chains that tie you down from achieving successful, long-term, and happy relationships. Regardless of how well you try to hide your wounds, there will be a moment of weakness when your unhealed wounds will show up in some way, shape, or form, destroying everything in the making.

A large part of building a positive mindset for healthy relationships depends on discovering your unhealed wounds and dealing with them. It is common for people to find quick fixes to feel better about themselves. Human psychology is such that we unconsciously try to rewrite the experience with a happier ending that once made us feel vulnerable and hurtful. Hoping that this time, we’ll be able to get it right.

What we need to do instead is take full responsibility for our feelings, wounds, and heartaches and deal with our healing process with utmost honesty. Yes, it will be tough bringing back those heartaches to the surface, but we need to let go and recover from these wounds to be able to be the best version of ourselves and find our confident inner voice.

5. Trusting your intuition and body
The only person who you can depend on to guide you in building a positive mindset for healthier relationships is yourself. Our mind and body always send us signals indicating our deep and true feelings. But we choose to ignore them because we don’t want to let go, or we choose to doubt the integrity of our intuition altogether.

But our fight or flight system is pretty accurate most of the time. The hinge you get in your heart when you meet someone iffy is spot on, yet we decide to keep going the wrong path only to discover later on that we’ve been right all along. As a result, we ignore the red flags and validate behaviours that may seem unfit for a mutually healthier relationship.

Whereas the correct approach should be to trust your intuition by creating a synchronised bond between your mind and your body. Most importantly, we should validate our experiences and judgment rather than go by what others have been projecting or pretending.

Take Away
Building a positive mindset for healthier relationships is a multistep process that will take time and require a lot more attention to first learn about yourself and the relationships you attract. Once you become aware of Self and what relationships mean to you, you will be able to find love that matters!

Written by Karen Simpson - Mindset and Confidence Coach
www.mindsetcoachnortheast.co.uk

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