Mandy Cook - The Autistic Teacher

12/09/2026

Sometimes we grow up wishing we weren’t quite so different.

I want the next generation of autistic children to grow up knowing that different was never the problem.

And I want autistic adults to know it’s not too late to believe that too.

Be you. You belong here. ❤️

Mandy Cook
The Autistic Teacher

12/09/2026

12/09/2026

“What’s your favourite?”

Sometimes that’s a surprisingly difficult question for me.

Partly because my brain immediately wants more information. 😬

Favourite song?

What genre?

What decade?

Favourite to sing?

Favourite in the car?

Favourite when I’m happy?

Favourite this week?

You need to be more specific! 😂

But there’s another reason this question hasn’t always been easy for me.

For a long time, I didn’t actually know some of my favourites.

I spent so much of my life trying to fit in.

Trying to get things right.

Trying to please people.

Trying to work out what everyone else wanted from me.

And somewhere amongst all of that, what I liked didn’t always seem particularly important.

What restaurant would I like to go to?

“I don’t mind.”

What do I want to do?

“Whatever you want.”

Which one do I prefer?

“Either.”

And sometimes I genuinely didn’t know.

Not because I didn’t have preferences.

But because I’d spent years learning to prioritise everyone else’s.

I think that’s been one of the unexpected parts of discovering I’m autistic later in life.

I’ve had to get to know myself too.

What do I actually like?

What feels comfortable to me?

What makes me happy when nobody else gets a vote?

What would I choose if I wasn’t trying to choose the right thing?

I’m still discovering some of the answers.

Mandy Cook
The Autistic Teacher

11/09/2026

“I was going to do it… then you told me to do it.” 😬

I’ve heard versions of this from so many autistic people.

Someone can genuinely intend to do something.

They might even want to do it.

But then someone reminds them.

Asks when they’re going to do it.

Tells them they need to do it.

Or simply adds an expectation to something that previously felt like a choice.

And suddenly, doing it feels much harder.

For some autistic people, demands can create a very real stress response.

And a demand doesn’t have to sound bossy.

“Could you just…?”

“Don’t forget to…”

“You need to…”

“Have you done…?”

Even something enjoyable can become difficult when it changes from something we can do to something we feel we have to do.

There can be lots of reasons for this.

It might be the loss of autonomy.

It might be the pressure of expectation.

It might be difficulty switching from one thing to another.

It might be that someone was mentally preparing to start, and the interruption has disrupted that process.

And for some people, particularly those with a PDA profile, the response to demands can be much stronger.

This doesn’t mean we can never ask autistic people to do anything. 😆

But sometimes changing how something is approached can make a big difference.

Less pressure.

More choice.

More time.

Clear expectations.

And, where possible, some control over when and how something happens.

It isn’t always about not wanting to do the thing.

Sometimes the pressure of having to do it is the very thing making it harder.

Mandy Cook
The Autistic Teacher

10/09/2026

“But everyone does that.”

Yes.

Sometimes they do.

Everyone can dislike a loud noise.

Everyone can become overwhelmed.

Everyone can get deeply interested in something.

Everyone can want to know what’s happening.

Everyone can struggle socially.

Everyone can need time alone.

Everyone can find certain clothes uncomfortable.

Everyone can miss a joke, forget to eat, struggle with change or find eye contact awkward sometimes.

That’s true.

Autistic experiences aren’t necessarily things that no other human being ever experiences.

The difference can be in the intensity, frequency, combination and impact of those experiences.

You might find the noise annoying.

I might be unable to think while it’s happening.

You might prefer to know the plan.

An unexpected change might leave me unable to do the thing at all.

You might become engrossed in something you enjoy.

I might become so absorbed that I don’t notice I’m hungry, thirsty or that several hours have passed.

And, of course, autistic people are all different too.

Something that has a huge impact on me might barely affect another autistic person.

Autism isn’t diagnosed by finding one mysterious behaviour that only autistic people do.

It’s a pattern.

A way of experiencing, processing and interacting with the world that extends across different parts of our lives.

So yes.

Everyone might do that.

But that doesn’t mean everyone experiences it in the same way.

Recognising yourself in one autistic experience doesn’t make that experience less autistic.

Because autism isn’t about having a list of behaviours that nobody else has.

It’s about the pattern, intensity and impact of those experiences, and the way they come together.

We are all human.
Of course our experiences overlap.

The difference is the daily impact.

Mandy Cook
The Autistic Teacher

09/09/2026

Autistic joy.

We talk a lot about autistic overwhelm.

Sensory overload.

Meltdowns.

Shutdowns.

Anxiety.

Masking.

And these things matter. We need people to understand them.

But autism isn’t only visible when something is difficult.

Sometimes it’s in the absolute joy of something I love.

The excitement of finding out something new about a subject I’m interested in.

Listening to the same song again because apparently 47 times wasn’t quite enough. 😬

Talking far too enthusiastically about something and suddenly realising I’ve been speaking for considerably longer than intended.

Noticing a tiny detail that makes me ridiculously happy.

Collecting things.

Organising things.

Researching something just because I need to KNOW.

Going back to something familiar because it feels good.

Sometimes autistic intensity can be difficult.

But sometimes that same intensity is wonderful.

And I think that’s important when we’re supporting autistic children too.

Don’t only learn what overwhelms us.

Learn what lights us up.

Notice the things we seek out.

The things we could talk about for hours.

The things that make our bodies move with excitement.

The things that bring comfort, fascination or absolute delight.

Because understanding an autistic person shouldn’t only be about understanding our difficulties.

Know our joy, too. ❤️

Mandy Cook
The Autistic Teacher

08/09/2026

This week in school we have been thinking about our emotions and some effective ways to regulate. As a teacher, and as a parent, it’s important to listen to the emotions of a child- not just to words but through the actions and expressions of the child. Every child deserves to be heard. Only then can you co-regulate to help support them.

08/09/2026

“But what made you think something was wrong?”

Sometimes I don’t know.

I just know.

I can walk into a room and feel that something has changed.

I can hear something in someone’s voice and know that they’re annoyed with me.

I can come away from a conversation knowing that something wasn’t quite right.

But ask me exactly what I noticed…

and I might not be able to tell you.

That’s one of the strange things about being autistic for me.

People sometimes assume that because I can struggle to interpret facial expressions, body language or unspoken social communication, I don’t notice these things.

I do.

Sometimes I notice far too much.

What I can struggle with is working out what all that information means.

Was that person annoyed?

Were they joking?

Did I misunderstand?

Did their voice actually change, or am I imagining it?

Was that comment aimed at me?

Have I done something wrong?

Sometimes I get the gist long before I can work out the details.

And sometimes I get it wrong.

That’s important too.

Being autistic doesn’t mean I have some magical ability to detect everyone’s emotions. 😬

It means my way of processing social information can be different.

I may notice something without being able to identify it.

I may recognise a pattern without being able to explain the individual clues.

And sometimes I need time before my brain puts all the pieces together.

So if I tell you that something doesn’t feel right, but I can’t immediately explain why…

that doesn’t necessarily mean there’s nothing there.

Sometimes the feeling arrives before the understanding.

Mandy Cook
The Autistic Teacher

07/09/2026

ONE SMALL CHANGE

Sometimes the best thing you can do is…

wait.

You ask me a question.

I don’t answer straight away.

So you ask again.

You rephrase it.

You give me another prompt.

You try to help.

But I may have heard you perfectly well.

I may understand what you’ve asked.

I may even know the answer.

I just need time.

Processing spoken language, working out my response and then turning that response into words can take time.

And if you ask me another question while I’m still processing the first one, I’ve now got even more to process.

So try one small change.

Ask the question.

Wait.

Give me genuine processing time.

Don’t immediately fill the silence.

If I still need support afterwards, then try something different.

Sometimes helping isn’t about giving me more words.

Sometimes it’s giving me time for mine.

Mandy Cook
The Autistic Teacher