Yalla Thrive

𝕎𝕙𝕖𝕟 𝕕𝕚𝕤𝕖𝕟𝕘𝕒𝕘𝕖𝕞𝕖𝕟𝕥 𝕚𝕤 𝕒𝕔𝕥𝕦𝕒𝕝𝕝𝕪 𝕕𝕚𝕤𝕥𝕣𝕖𝕤𝕤

Disengagement is often misunderstood.

When a young person stops trying, shrugs things off or says they do not care, it is easy to assume laziness or lack of motivation.

In reality, many young people disconnect when the pressure feels unbearable.

This can show up as:
• Avoiding revision or school conversations
• Saying “What’s the point?”
• Acting indifferent about exams or GCSEs
• Behavioural changes or anger
• Pulling away from family

For some, disengaging is safer than trying and risking failure.
For others, it is a way to hide feeling overwhelmed, ashamed or stuck.

𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐭𝐫𝐲…

• Separate behaviour from emotion
• Stay curious rather than confrontational
• Offer support before solutions
• Keep connection open even when school feels hard

“I don’t care” is often another way of saying “I don’t know how to cope.”

Both the high achiever and the disengaged young person can be struggling under the same pressure. It just looks different on the outside.

𝗧𝗿𝗮𝗳𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗱 𝗣𝗮𝗿𝗲𝗻𝘁𝘀｡ 𝗜𝘀 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗻𝗴 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗼𝗻 𝗺𝗮𝘀𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗶𝗿 𝘀𝘁𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀?

When “doing well” leads to not feeling well…

Some of the most stressed young people are the ones no one worries about.
They get the 𝗴𝗿𝗮𝗱𝗲𝘀.
They meet 𝗲𝘅𝗽𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀.
They 𝗸𝗲𝗲𝗽 𝗴𝗼𝗶𝗻𝗴.

But underneath, many high-achieving young people are carrying huge 𝗽𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀𝘂𝗿𝗲. 𝗣𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀𝘂𝗿𝗲 to maintain results. 𝗣𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀𝘂𝗿𝗲 not to disappoint. 𝗣𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀𝘂𝗿𝗲 to stay in control.

Parents often tell me:
“They’re doing well at school, 𝘴𝘰 𝘐 𝘥𝘪𝘥𝘯’𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘨𝘨𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨.”

What stress can look like in high achievers:
• Constant 𝘁𝗶𝗿𝗲𝗱𝗻𝗲𝘀𝘀 or 𝗵𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗮𝗰𝗵𝗲𝘀
• 𝗣𝗲𝗿𝗳𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗶𝘀𝗺 or 𝗳𝗲𝗮𝗿 of getting things wrong
• 𝗘𝗺𝗼𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝘀𝗵𝘂𝘁𝗱𝗼𝘄𝗻 at home
• Big 𝗲𝗺𝗼𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 over small things
• 𝗤𝘂𝗶𝗲𝘁 𝗮𝗻𝘅𝗶𝗲𝘁𝘆 before tests, mocks or GCSEs

These young people often mask brilliantly. They push through. They rarely ask for help because they do not want to be a problem.

• ɴᴏᴛɪᴄᴇ effort, not just outcomes
• ɴᴏʀᴍᴀʟɪsᴇ mistakes and rest
• Ask ʜᴏᴡ sᴄʜᴏᴏʟ ғᴇᴇʟs, not just how it is going
• ʀᴇᴀssᴜʀᴇ them they are 𝘃𝗮𝗹𝘂𝗲𝗱 𝗯𝗲𝘆𝗼𝗻𝗱 𝗴𝗿𝗮𝗱𝗲𝘀

Doing well on paper does not mean they are coping on the inside. Sometimes the strongest-looking young people are holding the most pressure.

This is something I see regularly in my work at Yalla Thrive. High-achieving young people who need support managing pressure, anxiety and expectations before it tips into burnout.

Weekly Yalla Thrive Group Sessions

Over the last few months, my weekly Yalla Thrive group sessions have been quietly doing their thing, supporting young people with confidence, emotions and the tricky stuff that often comes with growing up.

Current weekly groups include:

• Key Stage 2 (mixed gender)

• Key Stage 3 boys

• Key Stage 3 girls

With potential new session times / days currently in the planning stages!

These sessions provide a safe, supportive space where young people can:

• build confidence and self-worth

• explore friendships and peer challenges

• learn to manage big feelings and worries

• develop emotional awareness and resilience

• feel heard, understood and accepted

Sessions are engaging, creative and practical — not sit-and-talk therapy — and are designed to feel calm, welcoming and age-appropriate.

For families who are unsure whether a group is the right fit, I offer a 3-week trial for £15, giving your child time to settle in and see how it feels.

Bookings and full details:

https://yallathrive.classforkids.io

If you’re wondering whether this would suit your child, please feel free to message me for a chat. Sometimes it helps just to talk it through.

𝗔𝗿𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗮 𝗽𝗮𝗿𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝗼𝗿 𝗰𝗮𝗿𝗲𝗿 𝗼𝗳 𝗮 𝘁𝗲𝗲𝗻 𝗯𝗼𝘆 𝗶𝗻 𝗧𝗿𝗮𝗳𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗱? 𝗧𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗺𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝗯𝗲 𝗷𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂’𝗿𝗲 𝗹𝗼𝗼𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗳𝗼𝗿…

When boys struggle, it doesn’t always look like struggle.

We talk a lot about girls and friendship challenges, but boys are often quietly grappling with something just as complex: identity formation.

As boys move through late primary and into secondary school, they start asking big, mostly unspoken questions:

Who am I?
Where do I fit?
Am I enough?
How do I get respect?

At the same time, 𝒑𝒆𝒆𝒓 𝒂𝒄𝒄𝒆𝒑𝒕𝒂𝒏𝒄𝒆 becomes everything.
𝑺𝒆𝒍𝒇-𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒕𝒉 starts to wobble.
𝑬𝒎𝒐𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔 feel bigger, messier and harder to name.

And because many boys haven’t been taught how to safely express that inner chaos, it can come out sideways:

• sudden 𝒂𝒏𝒈𝒆𝒓 or 𝒔𝒉𝒖𝒕𝒅𝒐𝒘𝒏
• 𝒎𝒐𝒐𝒅 𝒔𝒘𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔 at home
• “𝑰 𝒅𝒐𝒏’𝒕 𝒄𝒂𝒓𝒆” behaviour
• 𝒊𝒎𝒑𝒖𝒍𝒔𝒊𝒗𝒊𝒕𝒚 or 𝒑𝒐𝒐𝒓 𝒄𝒉𝒐𝒊𝒄𝒆𝒔
• 𝒑𝒖𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒃𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒅𝒂𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒔 with adults and peers

What we often label as “behaviour problems” is frequently a boy trying to work out who he is and where he belongs without the tools to do it.

This is why boys need spaces that allow strength and vulnerability, confidence and emotional literacy.

Not to toughen them up.
Not to “fix” them.
But to help them understand themselves.

When boys feel secure in who they are, behaviour changes naturally.
Because 𝒓𝒆𝒈𝒖𝒍𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏 𝒇𝒐𝒍𝒍𝒐𝒘𝒔 𝒖𝒏𝒅𝒆𝒓𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒏𝒅𝒊𝒏𝒈.

If your teen’s anger or emotional reactions are starting to feel overwhelming at home, Yalla Thrive offers supportive 1:1 coaching and small group sessions for young people.

The focus isn’t on “fixing behaviour”, but on helping young people understand what’s going on inside and develop tools to manage it more confidently.

You’re very welcome to get in touch to explore what support might help.

If this resonates, please share it.
Boys deserve support too.