Green Tara Canada

Their opinion becomes your identity. Their comfort becomes your job. Their needs come before you’ve even noticed you have your own.

Nobody ever sits you down and teaches you how to do this differently. How to notice what you actually feel instead of moving past it. How to trust your own read on something instead of checking it against everyone else’s first. So you borrow the answer, belief or reaction instead. You become agreeable, easy, low-maintenance, whatever earns you a little more closeness... a little more acceptance.

It works for a while. Until you catch yourself in a relationship, a job, a room, and you can’t quite tell why you feel “off.” You forgot which part of this is actually you and what parts you built to be chosen. “Do I see it this way because of the societal norm, or is this truly serving my deepest fulfillment?”

Coming back to yourself starts small. Noticing a feeling before you explain it away. Sitting with a decision instead of asking three people what they’d do first. Letting a boundary exist even when it’s inconvenient for someone else.

That’s not being selfish. That’s self-compassion, the foundation everything else gets built on.

Comment PATTERN and I’ll send you my free guide on breaking the pattern of losing yourself in everyone else, so you can finally know who you are underneath it.

Palm Leaf Readings are the most accurate prediction method that is out there. But here’s what’s missing in most readings out there: the actual transformation!

Information alone doesn’t change your life. You can know your future, see your patterns, understand your purpose... and still not live it.

That’s why we do it differently:
Every Palm Leaf Reading comes with a complimentary integration session.
Because that’s where the magic happens.
That’s where information becomes action.
Where clarity becomes alignment.
Where you move from knowing your highest potential to actually living it.

We don’t just read your Palm Leaf. We help you shape your destiny.

Your future is written but it’s not set in stone. It’s being created by the choices you make today and the inner work you’re willing to do.

💚 DM me PALMLEAF for all the information and to book your Reading

They’ve done therapy. Retreats. Spiritual work. They know the pattern. They can name it, analyze it, even understand where it comes from.

But knowing hasn’t changed a thing.
The relationship still feels the same. The career still feels stuck. The shape-shifting still happens when they’re nervous. The anger or the self-abandonment still kicks in under pressure.

Here’s what I’ve learned after years of this work: Willpower doesn’t override what’s actually driving the behavior. Controlling how we behave will not solve our issues in the long run, because your behaviour was never the real issue to begin with.

For example: If you have a recurring conflict with your partner because you always ask where they’ve been, and they feel irritated... Deciding not to ask, and controlling yourself will not make things better. It might ease the tension between you two for a while, but the emotional discomfort within you will stay the same. You were originally trying to relieve the uncomfortable emotions you felt from not knowing. As a matter of fact, the confusion, or jealousy that you’re feeling...it will start getting worse, because you’re controlling the behaviours, but the emotions driving them stay ignored. And honestly, those emotions are exactly why you settle in that relationship in the first place. The emotions aren’t caused by the relationship. The relationship is caused by your emotions! :)


We don’t get to decide how we feel. Emotions can’t be controlled, and if we try to control them, they will find another way out. In the case above, it might be through sarcasm, passive aggressive comments, or shutting down, or just suppressing until they erupt in rage or depression.

Knowing what to do with our emotions and creating a healthy relation to them is what will create true change in our lives and our relationships.

That’s where the shift happens, not in understanding the pattern, but in feeling it in your body and knowing how to relate to yourself.
If you’re ready to finally break the cycle (not just understand it),
👉 book a free clarity call, DM me SELF

They’re out here rehearsing their best “I’ve grown so much” monologue and still haven’t changed their behaviour towards you since the last time they apologized.

Real accountability doesn’t come with a highlight reel. It’s not saying “I know I have work to do” in a way that gets them praised for self-awareness they never follow through on. It’s actually changing the behavior, every time, not just when someone’s watching or when the relationship’s already over, and admitting fault costs them nothing anymore.

Here’s why this matters past the joke: how someone handles accountability tells you their dating potential before you’re even attached. If they can say the right words about growth but the behavior never moves, that’s not a person in progress. That’s someone who learned the vocabulary without doing the work. They can act nice and say things that make you feel good, but that doesn’t mean they’ll protect your emotional wellbeing the way you need it protected.

But it’s also worth asking why this type keeps showing up for you specifically.

If you grew up around someone who said the right things and never backed them up with actions to make sure you stayed emotionally comforted and safe, if a real apology never came with change, or love got said more than it got shown, that gap between words and action can start to feel normal. Not exciting. Just familiar. So when someone repeats that pattern as an adult, your nervous system doesn’t flag it as a red flag. It reads as home, and normalizes it as “work in progress.” But there is no progress without the true inner work. And you will keep waiting, or facing the same issues again and again, until you finally open up toward yourself and examine it from your side with complete honesty.

That’s the part worth actually looking at. Not just why they do it, but why it felt okay to you for as long as it did.

DM PATTERN for my new free guide, it shows you how to break the cycle and attract the right partner.

We were raised to be strong. Independent. Able to build a life that doesn’t fall apart if nobody shows up for us.
So we did. Careers, bills, decisions, we handle it all ourselves.

Which means the only thing actually left for a partner to give us is emotional safety. Real consistency. Someone our nervous system doesn’t have to brace for.

And yet so many of us keep choosing the one who can’t give us that.

That has nothing to do with independence. It comes down to what we learned to call love long before we ever chose a partner. Chasing, inconsistency, being kept a little unsure... Familiar got wired into us as safe, even when it wasn’t.

This is exactly the pattern I untangle with my 1:1 clients, so they can finally recognize and choose the relationship that feels good, not just the one that feels familiar.

Comment PATTERN and I’ll send you my free guide to start unpacking yours.

Tarot, Palm Leaf Reading, Psychics, Astrology, most of it gets sold as certainty, like it’s handing you the exact future and all you have to do is live as usual, or follow some instructions. That’s not what this actually is, and honestly, that kind of framing is part of why this industry has so much fraud in it.

I’ve been researching and working with the Palm Leaves for almost 20 years now. I came into it skeptical and honestly, till this day, I only believe what I experience myself to full certainty. Which is exactly why I take the accuracy of these readings so seriously. The Palm Leaves are the most accurate prediction method, depending on who does it and how you are guided through it. But even they are meant to give help and guidance, instead of future projection.

It can tell you your blocks, say, in your relationships, and hand you the remedies to work on releasing it. You can do every puja, follow every recommendation to the letter, and still find the situation doesn’t move. Not because the reading was wrong. Because the block was never only external. If the emotional root of it is still running underneath, doing the ritual without doing the inner work is like clearing the path you want to drive on with a car that has issues with the steering wheel.

Translating that into everyday life: you can clear the blocks from today onward, and your perfect partner might come into your life, but if those energy blocks caused you to experience heartbreak in the past, the emotional backlash of those effects will cause issues in how you are able to connect with your perfect partner.

After guiding thousands of people through Palm Leaf Readings, I can confirm they are genuinely powerful. But the key to them is the correct integration. They are meant to be used as a map, and you’re still in the driver’s seat.

DM PALMLEAF if you want to book your authentic, guided Palm Leaf Reading.

Picture a 3-year-old who just lost their favorite toy. The sadness is real, and it’s painful. Even if both loving parents are there, and they mean well, they often try to fix it fast: “It’s not that bad...” “We’ll get you a new one.”

What that quietly teaches, without anyone meaning to, is: this feeling is too big, ignore it, replace it, move on.

Over the next months, that reaction became a habit, and over the next decades, it became completely normal. Normal to an extent that it was no longer acknowledged and never questioned. The body grew up, but the true emotional processing stayed the same as it was as a child.

Here’s what’s actually happening underneath it: everything we do is connected to what we feel. An emotion triggers a thought process. That process triggers a certain kind of behavior. When we repeat that behaviour enough times, it will become a habit. Keep repeating the habit long enough, and it becomes our personality. We’re built on our own emotional processing, or our lack of it.

That’s how you end up with a nervous system that learned emotions are a threat to manage; they’re scary and cannot be dealt with. That is a core misconception, not a fact.

And that’s the part that shows up in your relationships now. If you’ve learned to distract from your emotions as a child, it will feel threatening to be vulnerable as an adult in a relationship. Although to you, it might actually seem “normal”. You might not even realize it without slowing down to examine where your behaviour is truly coming from.

Your partner isn’t the one creating this pattern. But they will react to your emotional habits, and it will become a repeating cycle unless it’s addressed on the level it exists. Not superficially with behaviour, but where that behaviour comes from; emotionally.

Comment PATTERN and I’ll send you my free guide on understanding where this actually started, so you can finally regulate the pattern instead of reliving it.

Every time something doesn’t work, we go looking for the reason. His inconsistency. Her mixed signals. What was wrong with them this time.

Here’s what I’ve seen, over and over, in 18 years of doing this work.
The way we choose and show up in relationships isn’t random, it’s our “programming”. Our nervous system learned early, usually as children, that connection meant safety. So it built moves to protect that connection: chasing, shrinking, over-explaining, going quiet, what used to give us safety when we were young. Those moves are automatic, and go undetected. They don’t ask who the other person actually is. They just fire.

That’s why the same relationship keeps happening in a different body. New person, same chase. New person, same ways of having to stand up for yourself.

So before you look for what was wrong with them, ask yourself this instead.

💚 Am I staying because I’m happy, or because I’m hoping?
💚 Do I feel like we’re in this together, or am I alone?
💚 Is this really how I want to be loved, or did it just become normal?

These questions won’t hand you a list of red flags to look for next time. They’ll show you the wiring that’s been running the whole time, the one thing that actually changes once you finally look at it.

It was never about them. It’s about you.

If you want to go deeper, comment PATTERN and I’ll send you my brand new free guide, so you can start working with your own wiring instead of everyone else’s inconsistency.

Financial security feels safe on paper. But if you’re the one holding the emotional weight for both of you, you’re not actually resourced, you’re just tired in a nicer apartment.

A lot of women are the ones regulating the relationship, managing his mood, reading the room before they even walk in, softening how they say things so he doesn’t spiral. That’s not partnership. That’s a full-time job you didn’t apply for. And this is not to talk down on men, because it’s not about gender, it’s about behavioural patterns. Society never taught us how to regulate our emotions or how to attune to them in a healthy way, so we end up avoiding our own and trying to control how we’re perceived by others, without even realizing all the effort that goes into it.

A fulfilling partner gives you both: a sense of physical safety and stability for your life, and emotional stability and safety for your nervous system. If you only get one of those, you’re still doing half the work alone.

And the most important part is not what they say they give you, but how you feel. Do you feel safe emotionally and physically in your relationship? Because that’s what matters.

And if you keep ending up with someone you have to manage... if you’re tired of doing the emotional heavy lifting, it’s worth questioning why you do it in the first place.

Sometimes it’s not even about the money. It’s the quiet belief that we’re not enough on our own, so we reach for someone who we hope will help us feel more complete.

We all want safety and stability, but we don’t always realize that’s what we’re chasing, because we don’t even know we don’t feel safe. The lack of safety usually shows up first disguised as “the normal.” When something or someone feels familiar, or “normal,” it doesn’t mean they’re good for you. Sometimes what feels like home is just what you’re used to regulating, and what feels alive is just familiar adrenaline wearing a nicer outfit.

DM PATTERN for my new free guide, which helps you identify your own patterns so you can attract the right relationship for you.

You were called “too much” by people who didn’t have the capacity for you. Not because you were.

Here’s the part that’s easy to skip past: the goal was never finding someone who finally doesn’t think that about you. It’s coming back to yourself first. Getting curious about your own feelings instead of avoiding them and avoiding how others make you feel. Choosing yourself loudly instead of shrinking to keep things comfortable for someone else.

Every relationship you’ve had is really a reflection of the relationship you have with yourself. That’s where the pattern can actually start to change who you attract.

Ask yourself: How much hurt and pain have you learned to call “normal” that should possibly never even be such a part of a relationship? And what are you actually getting out of staying small?

Comment PATTERN and I’ll send you my free guide on breaking the pattern that keeps showing up, so you can build a relationship with yourself first, and a life that actually feels like yours.