Eclarity Fertility Coaching

💾🎢Your emotions will continue to control you until you acknowledge them - This technique saves the day 👇

Emotions are something we have... Not something we become.

☝️ That sentence right there changed my life and was the first step in turning everything around in our fertility journey.

Finally having the knowledge that it was possible to be on the difficult path through infertility, and not be completely at the mercy of my emotions.

Finally being able to live without the fear of big emotional reactions at an unexpected trigger, pregnancy announcement, or reminder of what we didn't yet have but desperately wanted.

My emotions had become my a huge part of my identity, and I was afraid of them. Does that resonate for you too?

So how do you turn it around?

Our emotions are simply something we experience. And something we have the power to alter. And this technique breaks it down into a process you can follow.

This technique is powerful on many levels.

First and foremost, it creates some space between the physical sensation and the thought process causing the emotion.

It activates the logical, analytical part of your brain that helps you find the words to name what you're feeling.

And it removes the overwhelm of being overstimulated by multiple sensations all at once, and breaks each sensation down into smaller more manageable chunks.

We use intention, and being present in the moment and in our body.

We use controlled and targeted thoughts, focusing on one thing at a time, instead of everything at once.

And we use visualisation and breath to self-soothe and regulate.

And all the while, the intensity and strength of the emotion has the opportunity to wane, while at the same time receiving the recognition, acknowledgement and validation that we know this journey is difficult.

Save this one, and remember where to find it for next time you're having that emotional rollercoaster experience and for moments of intense emotional waves.

And drop me a DM if you give it a go to let me know how you find it 🙏💟

✨ Your fertility coach, guide, and therapist - Elle

Are you making the same mistakes I did through 3 years of infertility? 😶‍🌫️💔

▶️ Taking time for granted and waiting too long before seeking help

▶️ Making assumptions about your health as opposed to KNOWING what shape you are in and whether your bodies are also on Team-Baby all the way

▶️ Trying every pill, potion, supplement, drink, method under the sun "just in case" because "it can't hurt"

▶️ Progressively becoming more and more consumed by the pressure and stress

▶️ Letting big emotions like anger, shame, and anxiety rule your life and withdrawing from what you used to love doing

▶️ Feeling locked in constant survival mode - thinking life can resume when you're pregnant

Let me tell you the biggest thing I now know from my own journey, and by guiding so many other couples to their baby....

Your baby is closer than you think - ✨️ SO MUCH CLOSER ✨️

Don't take anything for granted on this journey. If you are ready, your baby is too.

🔍 It's time to ditch the scattergun approach, and actually hone in on the precise actions and tweaks that your body is craving so it can conceive.

It's time to take back control of your own fertility timeline 🙌

⏳️ Ready to meet your baby sooner rather than later? DM me the words "Book Now" to book a call this week.

Let's bring forward the timeline on your baby dream 👶🤰

Elle ✨️

Does infertility leave you feeling like you're trapped on a level in a video game, unable to progress? 🎮🕹 Just remember...

It's the strength, courage and resilience gained through this phase of life that will carry you into the next, whatever is in store.

Don't spend all your time living for the future, and miss the beauty that every phase of life entails. You will get to where you want to go. Soon.

🙏 Please share this post if you can relate or know of someone who might.

Elle
✨️

What if holding onto your beliefs about your fertility journey is holding you back? And what if they are false to begin with?!

Let me break this down...

If you believe something to be true, there's really no reason to question what is in front of you.

Your ability to consider something with a critical mind is impaired by those beliefs, and often it's difficult to see any alternatives that differ from what you believe is true.

But let me let you in on a little secret... sooooo often, your beliefs weren't yours to begin with, they've be passed on by someone else.

Yep that's right - what you believe about infertility may not even apply to you.

If you've heard that the only way to have a baby when you have PCOS is through IVF.

If you've heard that after 12 months of trying and no pregnancy, there must be something wrong with you.

If you've heard that infertility is the fight of your life.

If you believe that there's a societal expectation that you have to go through this in isolation.

If you believe that no-one can possibly understand what this feels like for you.

What about if you believe natural conception is impossible for you? What do you think might happen as a result of that belief?

Or any of the above?

🤔 If you believe that your body is always listening and waiting for instructions, what beliefs would you be releasing right away?

If you're interested in unlocking the secrets and benefits of a prepared mindset through infertility, I have opened some free calls for next week and I'd love to chat with you about how this could change the game for your journey to a baby.

DM me the word "PREPARED" and let's book in a time 🗓

Elle ✨️

📣 The throw-away comments hurt 👊 Just FYI... please don't say these things to people who trust you enough to share their greatest heartache with you.

And the comments come in all shapes and sizes. Help me build the library of the words that have hurt us, so we can create awareness of what not to say 🙏

📲🤳 Send the last slide to your stories and type your "swear jar" text over the top. Awareness leads change.

Elle ✨️

🌊 Have you heard the analogy I use to help process your emotions? ⬇️

For a while now I've been thinking about my emotions as though they are waves rolling in from the deep ocean, washing up onto the sand.

Some of those waves are big and forceful, fueled by a powerful external influence, a storm, galeforce winds, or tremors of the earth. The noise of that wave crashing is loud and visceral, and you can feel the vibration under your feet where you stand.

Others gently sweep up onto the sand with barely a noise.

Imagine if you were swimming in the ocean with the big powerful waves. There's a high likelihood of a wave picking you up and throwing you up onto the beach. You land completely ungracefully with your face in the sand and your dignity in shreds.

But other waves would barely be felt as they passed you by.

It's the same with your emotions. Some roll over you and carry you to places you didn't want to go, in ways you'd never normally show. While other emotions are nice, soothing, enjoyable.

The thing about waves is that you can't stop them. You can go through them, under them or over them, but they still happen regardless.

You can't stop your emotions. They're coming regardless. And knowing how to process them as they come... that's your life raft.

If you want to join my email list of like-minded fertility friends who are tapping into the knowledge and insights of the things that will bring their baby dream to life - send me a DM with your email address and I'll happily send free weekly coaching, support and tips directly to your inbox too 😊 📧

Elle ✨️

You're not alone in feeling this way.

And most importantly, there is absolutely no shame in this sense of questioning coming to the surface.

It is the truest form of self-awareness to observe our hesitations.

Because it's a moment in time where we have the opportunity to consider what has changed.

For many, this point is an opportunity to reaffirm that they still want a family more than anything, but that they are no longer willing to sacrifice the joy of living a full life in the meantime.

And in that moment of realisation, they set the intention to bring balance back into their approach to fertility. And it's probably the most powerful thing they could ever do.

And for others, it can be just as empowering to see that they need a break. A reset in their nervous system. And time to heal. Grieve. Process.

Either way, it's an indication that you've been living for a long time with an external pressure consuming your every action.

So my recommendation is always to take some time to sit with this feeling. Whether you take a cycle where you don't track. Or you take time out to sit and reconnect with your inner heart. Maybe you spend some time with a trusted confidante who can simply listen and hold space while you work through it.

Take it slow. You'll know the truth in your heart once you're able to slow down and listen in 💗

Elle ✨️

🫣Infertility nearly broke me, but people-pleasing nearly killed me.

I spent 3 years at war with myself.

Deep down I knew that the only way I was going to get through our fertility journey was to process and honour what I was feeling in a way that gave me the strength and resilience to continue moving toward our baby.

But as a long-time people-pleaser, that didn’t always feel like an option.

I already felt like I was letting us down by not being able to fall pregnant, so I desperately didn’t want to let anyone else down in any other way– sound familiar?

So I got really good at hiding what I was feeling.

I would put on a mask of “everything is fine” and would show up no matter what.

Sometimes the distraction helped.

It felt good to be busy doing “normal” life things and being there for everyone around me.

But the more I kept up the façade on the outside, the more my inner world crumbled out of control.

I started having emotional outbursts – blocks of time where I felt unrecognisable even to myself.

And I began living in fear that something would “set me off” and I’d start crying uncontrollably or fall apart in public.

I’d been trying to ignore my emotions for so long – but emotion isn’t designed to be ignored.

Everything had built up – like water behind a dam wall. And I no longer had a say when or where that emotion would be revealed. So I started to withdraw from life around me.

After one particular outburst, I remember realising just how much I’d lost my way.

I’d been chasing a “superwoman identity” where I could handle everything all at once and nothing would affect me, but in truth I’d been setting myself up to fail and I was the one who needed rescuing.

I decided to take off the costume and the mask that went with it.

I started tuning back into what I needed and what I was feeling first and foremost.

And things drastically changed.

Can I say that I'm a recovered people-pleaser? Honestly no - But I now have the self-awareness to spot the signs and course correct. And you can too.

Please share this post if you can relate or know someone who might 🙏

💬 Your body is just as invested in a baby as you are!

Since puberty, your body has been waiting for an opportunity to respond to a complex sequence of hormones and interactions to support the conception, implantation, and development of a baby.

It's easy to forget this when you're desperately hoping for that positive test - I certainly forgot, and felt like my body was working against me.

However in truth, your body has been trying its best to work with what it's got I.e. within the parameters available

But we all know that sometimes working with what we've got, and "making do " is less than ideal. And the desired outcome doesn't quite measure up to what we were hoping for.

Yes, if absolutely everything was optimised, balanced, and responding beautifully, things may be more straight forward and simple.

But the reality is.... your body isn't going to wait for everything to be perfect before it decides to support conception 💣

The reality is, it's going to try every single cycle, to achieve the desired outcome 👶 working with what's already available.

Every single step you take with fertility in mind is ensuring you are increasing the opportunity for your body to do what it already wants to do.

Your body is team baby too. It just needs your support to give it more of what it needs.

✨️ Elle