The Conscious Echo

🌸 These are the things I wish someone had sat me down and said.

Instead, I found them in my 30s — in coaching, in journaling, in hard conversations with myself.

My children won't have to wait that long.

🌼

Which one hit you the hardest?
Drop the number below — I genuinely want to know. 💙

Save this and share it with the parent who needs to see it today.

We are riding the waves of the 5yr old BIG feels.
And they feel huge.

The 'holding it togetherness' of the day combined with learning SO much (my baby is actually reading & writing now 🥹), combined with overstimumation, sitting for long periods, an obvious growth spurt (& he's eating so much!), plus likely needing more sleep than usual...

🌋It's like seeing a whole different child.🌪

But I now know this is temporary.

We have been through this 1x before.
My daughter is nearly 9 now, but she went through the same thing when she was 5.
And I am not ashamed to admit I googled things like "what the heck is happening to my child" even though I have quite a bit of knowledge around child development.
It can be confronting when it happens.
I was still so worried something was wrong.

The screaming, the tears, the lashing out...& often we were left completely confused about what caused it in the 1st place. A walk through the doors from school and 🌋🌋🌋.

Only this time, I am able to ride it out WITH them.

💜My calm invites HIS calm
💜My slow, deep breath slows HIS breath
💜My holding, loving, & silence allows him to get it out
💜My own inner work BEFORE these big moments allows me to remain regulated throughout it all, however long he needs

🥰 & once he's through it, I see my sweet boy come back again.

There are so many reasons why I support mums to work through their challenges, to regulate their nervous systems & to learn how to love themselves again. But this has got to be 1 of my favourite reasons why I do this work.

To feel the difference in my own body now doing the '5yr old big feels' roller-coaster for the 2nd time...I am witnessing a whole different version of myself as a mother supporting her child through what used to be a complete upheaval to my own nervous system. It's proof that the things we do for ourselves make a bigger difference than we realise.

(See comments for more...)

In all honesty, I always hesitate to share this type of thing.

I often think:
“Who am I to teach this?”
“What if it’s not good enough?”

So instead, I am deciding, "Who am I to keep this information to myself? What if I can help just 1 mum, 1 family, 1 child simply by sharing this?"

And from all the parents that I speak with each week, I know so many are sitting in overwhelm right now —
WANTING to do better, but not knowing how.

💟

So I made something simple.
Something to help make the journey a little easier.

This is a short guide (*very short - I know time is limited as a parent!) to help you understand your child’s behaviour in a different way.

Not as “bad” or “naughty”
…but as skills that they are still learning.

Because when we shift how we see our kids,
we change how we can then respond to them.

And that’s where everything begins.
It is also where you begin to feel calm as well,
simply because you understand their behaviour in a different way.

💕

If you want it, just comment GUIDE or send me a message and I’ll share it with you 🤍

Did you know...

..that your son or daughter is going to grow up with a set of skills and knowledge that you didn't?

I actually know this for a fact. 🙋‍♀️

Simply because you follow pages like mine ☝️and read posts like this one tells me that you are a parent who wants to do things differently to how you were raised. (Or...) Perhaps you actually loved your upbringing, and now you want to understand how to do more of the same for your child.

💗 Either way, I can tell you are someone who continues to learn and grow with your child, teaching them with intention and purpose.

We want our sons and daughters to grow up KNOWING who they are. LOVING who they are.

And that can sometimes be quite tricky if they don't know how to do that. Even more so if you yourself don't know how to do that. (And thats okay, because this wasn't the norm for so many of us growing up, nor for our parents OR their parents either.)

➡️ If there is one big piece of knowledge I can send to you today, it is this:

🩷Loving and accepting yourself for who you are, all the best bits and the not-so-great bits, the parts of you that you are working on, the parts that are complete, the past, present and future versions of yourself...all of it..

..is one of the BEST things you can do to help your child learn this, too. 💗

It is a choice you CAN make. To recognise what you have been through, what strength you have shown, how you have grown, and how incredible your life is, even when things sometimes feel less than ideal. There is nothing 'wrong' with you, even if you are striving for 'more' or 'better' in some areas.

Once you can make that choice for yourself, and PRACTICE that choice every day in how you speak, how you think, and how you treat yourself...the little eyes that watch HOW YOU do life will start to learn how to do that too.

It always starts with you.

Day 1 of officially having 2 kids in big school.
All that we did for the last 5 years with my 2nd born leads us to today.

6 months ago I was sure he was ready.
Today, I wondered if I chose wrong.

😿Would he be brave enough to ask for the toilet?
😿Would he persist with the tricky lunch box zip?
😿Would he be confident to play with his new friends?

So many wonderings.
And I am not physically there anymore to guide him through those day-to-day moments where he might struggle.

But then I remember.
💫Struggles aren't a bad thing.
💫Challenges aren't the end.
💫A bit of fear shouldn't stop you.

He is a pretty courageous kid.
He loves making new friends.
He is a curious adventurer.

He will be more than fine. Tricky moments and all.
Just as he will be in every year after this.

This is where he will learn to trust himself. To speak up. To push through tricky times, and pause to reset. To take a break when he needs it. To communicate his needs. To grow and learn.

And more importantly...To have fun.

Is he ready? Yep.
Am I ready? I will be.

To all the other Prep mums...you got this. We got this. They have got this. Take those deep breaths.

And from someone who has now done this day 2x...it absolutely does get easier.

💟💟💟

Self-love has to start early.
It is a step that most people skip completely and then end up only seeking out love, acceptance, and approval from other people and places.

I work with women in their 30s and up, all mothers, and almost all have the same common theme. They 'do' and 'be' for everyone else. And then they feel as though something is missing. They dont know how to turn inward. To be proud of themselves. To identify what makes them amazing.

We need to be starting this with kids so they can grow up to become sure of themselves and who they are.

Actually, ask yourself this right now:
*what makes you amazing?
*what are you most proud of that YOU did for you?

Gratitude helps you to find pockets of 'good' in every day.

It isn't about only ever feeling 'good.'
And it isn't about pretending that everything is always okay.

Teaching and expressing gratitude is a practice that takes an intentional effort to begin. It also involves acknowledging that sometimes we might feel many conflicting feelings and emotions that make finding things to be thankful for tricky. And that is also okay!

By finding gratitude in our days, we can start to shift the things that we focus on. Instead of the hard bits consuming our every thought, gratitude can put a smile on your face, give you the boost to keep going, give you courage to stand tall, and give you the hug that you might need.

Can you imagine what that will do for your child as they grow up and start navigating the beautiful complexities of life?

Courage, resilience, strength, compassion, joy...so many powerful qualities that your child can develop simply by finding 1 thing to be grateful for each day.

So what are you grateful for today?

Embracing sibling arguments...that seems like a bizarre concept if you grew up with very much the opposite experience.

But like it says above...

1. Your child is NEW to this life, and of course, they won't know how to handle all interactions and emotions easily! It is a skill that must be taught first.

2. They are working, playing, and living their life in close proximity to someone who is ALSO learning all of these concepts at the same time. Arguments are inevitable, just like they are for adults.

3. Early sibling arguments are the actual training grounds for the relationships that come into their life. Their sibling(s) are the training partners to practice on. (As long as we can recognise this and not shut them down first!)

4. They give YOU the chance to recognise where your own past experiences might be hindering their chance for successful relationships in the future. If your kids fighting, bickering and arguing really triggers you...it is probably because of what this meant for you as a child navigating the same things.

👇👇👇

Arguments can be a really healthy part of childhood, and the role YOU play in them is important. How you respond to those arguments, how you step in OR step back to help them navigate them, and how you regulate yourself to manage them without becoming triggered yourself is all very important.

If you feel easily triggered or find yourself constantly reacting and shouting over their loud voices during arguments, take this time to notice your own emotions around it all. This is where understanding the benefits of their arguing comes in (which is all of the above info), but also the immense importance of being able to regulate yourself to be able to respond in a powerful way is a must.

🌬 So this is why I always teach women & mums about calming their own nervous systems 1st. You need to be able to think clearly & calmly so you can recognise that the arguing isn't "bad." This means finding your breath & deeply breathing throughout your day so your body doesn't think it's in danger. Put this into practice daily, & you will start to "react" less & "respond" more.

Relationships can be tricky, but they aren't impossible.

Breaking down "empowered kids" one lesson at a time.

Empowered Kids know kindness.
💕Kindness to others.
💝Kindness to themselves.

Teaching this means showing it in action.
Real-life examples on a regular basis.

And can you guess what will have the most impact?

That's right.

You.
Your modelling of what Kindness towards others looks like,
AND
Your modelling of what Kindness towards yourself looks like.

So make sure the next time you are driving in traffic, or you make a mistake, or you're struggling with something difficult...you have the perfect opportunity to model how powerful words and actions can be.

There are 2 ways you can teach your child.
(Okay, I agree. There are actually way more than 2.) But...

🤞You can either TELL them something and hope your fingers they understand.

👌Or you can show them. Involve them. Inmerse them.

💫And they WILL learn.💫

Now...
What do plants need?
Water, sun, soil.
🪴🪴🪴

They also need the air that comes out of our mouths. And there are some beautiful little studies out there in support of speaking kindness to your plants to help them grow. True or not, it makes enough sense to me that I now have a family of little plant waterers that LOVE getting to water the house plants and say positive comments and affirmations to them.

The benefits?
🌱It's an easy and fun house 'chore' that they get excited to do. "Chores" are an opportunity to help the family team and take care of our home. Together.
☘️My plants get regular watering (which also makes us all feel excited when we see their new leaves and height each week!)
🌿It builds independence in an opportunity that has a very high success rate. Very little room for error. Only celebration!

🌻And most importantly, there is a conversation about the power of speaking kindness to all living things. Kindness and positivity helps us to grow. They SEE the results of their efforts every time we comment on a new leaf or how big the plants are getting. To them, their words are magic and creating these miracles. They treat the plants like these loving pets that we love taking care of. Positive words, positive phrases and statements become the norm. I don't need to model this activity at all anymore (although I love walking by and loving on all ny new leafy babies. Must be a late 30s thing 😂)

My 4 year old is so sweet. He likes to whisper things like "have fun growing! You're doing good growing! " and even "I love you!" 🥹

So try it out if you have plants at home!
As I always say...Start with you first!
Let them see and hear you treating the plants this way!
Name your plants and add name tags!

And then...watch as not only your plants growth takes off... but also the goodness in your kids hearts 💕