12/09/2025
They aren't Autistic. No way, Jose. You don't understand. They're just....
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*A picky eater.
*A night owl.
*Sensitive to loud and overlapping sounds.
*Really detail oriented.
*Only able to tolerate the feeling of certain socks.
*Kind of blunt.
*Drawn to water....
It may be hard to get them into the water, but once they are in, it's an intense battle to get them out.
*Confused by sarcasm.
*Really into collecting sticks...and rocks.
*A kid who really can't be left with a babysitter. They are just...a bit intense and it's hard for them to settle down if things aren't don't a certain way.
*Sensitive to bright lights. Lamps are so much better than flourescents.
*Loud. They speak loudly when excited and just can't seem to bring their volume down.
*A bit gender non conforming. Well, who isn't, these days?
*Into bringing their own food with them. It makes them feel less anxious.
*Easier to get to sleep in Mom's bed--
Yeah. I know they are 10. They'll grow out of it, someday.
*Really specific in the words they use. They like to be clear in their communication.
*Very concerned with caregivers being consistent--
Don't lie to them or try to fool them. They will hold a grudge for a decade, if they find out.
*Happy flappy--
I used to sing them that "get your wiggles out" song and that's why they flap when they are excited.
*Super honest. They aren't trying to hurt anyone's feelings.
*Hard to buy presents for. Better send cash. All they are really into right now is....
Anatomical models
Brightly colored Beads and Buttons
Fossils
Retired Lego
Antiques and artifacts
Old coins
Dragon and Unicorn statues
Taxidermy
Stained glass
Carnivoras plants
Studio Gihbli art projects
Vintage cameras
Hats
Dollhouse and Train Table miniatures
Tea pets
Cobalt glass
Oddly specific tools
Cosplay accessories
Megaladon teeth
Models of Mummies
and vintage video games
*Unable to tolerate certain textures in foods.... cooked mushrooms, fresh watermelon, meat on the bone, squishy blueberries--
I dunno. It's easier to feed them something processed, in a packet.
*Sensitive to smells.
*Kind of squeaky. I dunno. Maybe it's like a tic? Sometimes they blink their eyes really hard, too.
*Prone to bumping themselves on corners. Lots of bruises.
*Socially awkward.
*Really good at spotting small differences between things.
*Uncomfortable eating in the cafeteria. They don't really like family dinner, either--
We just let them eat in their room.
*Nervous about making phone calls.
*Unable to sleep without something applying pressure to them, like a bunch of plush toys or a Weighted blanket.
*Someone who struggles to smile for the camera.
*More an animal person than a people person.
*Unable to recognize they need to go p*e until it's almost too late.
*A little different from most kids their age. Eccentric, gifted, socially behind... something like that.
*Able to see solutions nobody else sees.
*Prone to night terrors, sleep walking, and snoring.
*Not someone who likes parties. They would rather hang with just one friend.
*Hard to keep safe. It's like they don't see the danger!
*Really worried about everybody getting equal treatment. It's important to them that everybody gets their fair share--no more, no less.
*Very attached to their stuffed bunny. I know most 9 year olds don't need a lovey but it really helps her stay chill.
*Likely to chew on their shirt, or hair, or pencil.
*Really pre-occupied with facts about cats, Star Trek, the Titanic, ancient Egypt, space, Pokemon, sharks, anime, and dinosaurs.
*A bit literal. I have to choose my words carefully.
*Unable to keep their shoes on, for very long.
*Really empathic. They can't watch movies where animals get hurt. It feels too real.
*Prone to over-heating.
*Bad with reading body language-- You have to be direct.
*Need to know what the plan is, in advance. That's why school assemblies are so stressful.
*Unable to tolerate shirts with tags.
*A bit weird with eye contact. They aren't ignoring you. It's just easier to talk while they play their phone game.
*Tired out by school. They collapse afterwards and get really grumpy.
*Insensitive to pain. It's like they don't realize it's bad until it's REALLY bad, but they don't show it so the doctor doesn't believe us.
*A smart kid that struggles with school. If we could pick our teachers it would go so much smoother.
*An insomniac.
*Obsessed with their collections. Rocks. Trains. Miniatures. Old Bottles. Coins. Lego. Plushies--They have a few different things it's better not to touch.
*Fidgety. That's why they like to be under tables or squat on their chair.
*Unable to keep pants on, when at home. You better knock because someone in our house is always naked.
*A bit of a loner....they prefer adult company. And they HATE group assignments.
*Unable to realize they should be wearing a coat, when it's cold.
*Focused on doing things the exact same way, every time. They like routines.
*More into parallel play than cooperative play.
*Often unwell....they catch every bug and sometimes run fevers for no real reason.
*Tuned into patterns they can observe...they like to complete or make their own patterns, too. Drawing, lining things up, making lists, sorting things by color or size.
*Anxious in crowds and lines.
*Not necessarily shy....they just need to know what to expect.
*Prone to ankle and wrist sprains.
*Unable to shower or brush hair without reminders. They just kind of live in their head
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Oh. Maybe they ARE Autistic.
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Does this sound like someone you know?
Is it you? .... Or your child?
