Etiquette For All

Whilst on holidays I was thinking about Etiquette and how we use it to make others around us feel comfortable. But what about us? It is also important that we make ourselves comfortable with being us. If we follow Etiquette rules for how we treat ourselves, then we feel impowered to do the same for others.

Below are four rules that I like to follow. They allow me to show up at my best for others.

After two successful workshops I am happy to announce, I will now be taking private bookings. If you have a party or event coming up and would like something different to WOW your guests, then contact me and let us work together to make your event memorable.

It's Valentine's day, so I thought I'd share some old fashion Etiquette. The below is just an example of how Etiquette changes with time.

Recently I was asked about my business and I would like to share my response with you. My business is based on the concept that the trajectory of your life is intertwined with the relationship you have with others. In order for us to be happy in our personal and professional lives we must create positive interactions with others. The primary rule of Etiquette is to make others feel comfortable. This is an important tool when it comes to creating positive interactions. There is a great saying which goes, "people may not remember what you did or said but they will always remember how you made them feel". It is my mission to provide people with the tools to make others around them feel good, thereby creating a happier world.

It is easy to get flustered and go into a panic when having guests over for a meal or party.

I would like to share with you my 5 top tips for hosting an event.

1. Set a budget. It is easy to lose track of exactly what you are spending on food, decorations, drinks and other purchases. Decide ahead of time what you can afford and how much you will spend on each category.

2. Work with what you already have. If you have an abundance of a particular vegetable in your garden, or you have lots of blue plastic party plates, plan to use these items to save you money. Recently I hosted a morning tea at my home, in the photo you will see the top tablecloth was too short, so I used a bottom tablecloth which was folded at the ends as it was too long. The Italians have a word for this “arrangiarsi” to make do.

3. Do not try doing it all yourself. Think about outsourcing some of the food, either purchasing from a caterer or allowing your guests to bring a plate, most people love this because then they do not have to worry about bringing a gift. Give yourself permission to enjoy the event.

4. On the day of the event set a timeline and stick to it. The timeline should show the importance of the tasks so that if you are running short on time you can concentrate on the tasks marked high importance and leave the less important ones for the end if you have time.

5. Do not sit your guests at the dinner table on arrival. It is a clever idea to take your guests to another area where they can enjoy a drink before they are directed to the dinner table. This will give you time to finish any last-minute table setting which is required.

Our final workshop on "The Art of Table Setting" is coming up on the 17th February. Be sure not to miss out by contacting Etiquette For All to secure your booking.

I am a big lover of handbags, so I thought we would look at handbag Etiquette today.

Handbags should be carried on the left side of your body, leaving your right hand free for greeting people.

Keep bags close to your body to avoid hitting others when passing. If in a crowded area place shoulder bags in your hand.

Never place your bag in your armpit. On formal occasions where drinks and canopies will be served, ensure your clutch has a chain or strap so that your hands are free to hold a drink in one and food in the other.

Never place your handbag on the floor. There is a saying in Feng Shui “Bag on the floor, money out the door.” Even if you do not follow Feng Shui there are other reasons to avoid putting your bag on the floor, one being hygiene and the other you run the risk of people tripping over your bag.

Never place handbags on the table. Bag hooks are a clever idea they neatly clip onto the table where you are sitting. If you do not have one consider putting your bag, on a spare seat, on your lap under your napkin if small enough or between your back and the back of the chair. Wherever you choose to place your bag ensure it is secure and not at risk of being stollen or tampered with.

Keep the contents of your bag meticulously organized, group equivalent items together and place them in clear ziplock bags. This not only enables you to see the contents but makes changing from one bag to another a lot easier.

Finally, I’m Excited to say we now have our Etiquette For All Lolly bags for sale. These gorgeous little bags will add a sense of style and sophistication to any event. And yes, they can be placed on the dinner table without breaking any Etiquette rules.

The napkin ring was first used in France in the 19th Century, before the invention of washing machines. As the napkins would only be laundered once a week, it was a way of making sure each person used their own napkin. Once the washing machine arrived in 1858 the washing was a much easier chore and the napkin ring was no longer required for this purpose. This dirty truth is why some people advocate against the use of napkin rings on a formal table setting. However others, like me see them as a thing of beauty. They can present the napkin in an elegant way with a minimum of fuss. Also if your crafty you can make your own to match the theme of your event. I'd love to hear your thoughts, please leave a comment below. Also if you have made napkin rings please share your photos.

According to my Moonology diary tonight is a full moon and one of the things suggested I do is start a gratitude journal.
This got me thinking about the Etiquette of Thank you.
From an early age we are taught to say thank you just as we are taught to say butter or milk. In fact as we grow, we say it so often that its true value is lost.
In some situations, simply making eye contact and saying thank you is all that is required. Examples of this would be someone opening a door for you or receiving great service from a shop assistant.
However, if you are thanking the host of a dinner party you attended, saying thank you for a gift or just letting someone know you appreciate them, then a thank you note would be in order.
The recipient will appreciate your thoughtful gesture.
A thank you note should be dated and include the recipient's name and title. It should be short, to the point and clearly outline what you are thankful for. You can sign off as either yours faithfully if you do not know the person or yours sincerely if you do. Obviously, love from can also be used if it is a friend or relative.

I would recommend every parent purchase their child a letter writing set and encourage them to write thank you notes to anyone they feel has done something they should be grateful for; a relative who has baby sat them, their friends for coming to a party and bringing a gift. If your child is too young to write, get them to draw pictures. It is never too early to teach them that “Thank you” is not just a word.

Recently I was asked a great question, "Where would the cutlery be placed for palate cleansers on a degustation menu?"

This is an interesting question because we would normally associate sorbets, which is a common palate cleanser used with desert. However, in this case, as it is served to improve the experience of the dishes being served, the cutlery required would be placed in-between your forks and knives in order of service.
Something to bear in mind if you are considering hosting a degustation menu, is the room on your table. The standard spacing between each seated guest is 60cm, when you consider that 30cm is taken up by the plate this only leaves 15cm each side for cutlery. As the menu can include 10 dishes or more, you will need to consider either serving your palate cleansers on spoons, resting on plates, serving a palate cleanser which can be picked up with fingers or setting new cutlery during the meal.

Yesterday was my first "Art of Table Setting Workshop" and it really brought home the reason I do this. Not only do I love everything Etiquette and sharing the knowledge but I get so much joy from meeting people and learning from them. I met some amazing people yesterday and thank them for filling my heart with so much joy.
One of our participants was Tali, a photo of his table setting is featured below. Well Done Tali, I give your table setting five stars.
If you or someone you know was thinking of attending yesterdays session and was unable to attend, there will be another on Saturday 17th February, 2024 hope to see you then.

One of the most common misconceptions about Etiquette is that you must point your little finger when drinking tea. Whilst the origins of pointing the finger are inconclusive, they range from the cups used at the time requiring the finger to be pointed for balance, to the finger being pointed as way for a women to send secret messages to men. One theory even involves Queen Victoria and the fact that her arthritis prevented her from bending her finger and people started to copy this.
Whatever the origins Etiquette Consultants agrees it is no longer acceptable and considered quite rude to point the pinkie