Creative Living with Children

Creative Living with Children

This page provides support for www.creativelivingwithchildren.com which provides resources and devel

This page aims to provide further resources and support for those who use my website Conscious Creative Courageous Living with Children at www.creativelivingwithchildren.com It posts links to informative current articles, my blog, helpful books, reminders and advice on a wide variety of topics related to children's wellbeing.

19/08/2022

Simple but deep.

Absolute BEST thing...

19/08/2022

Indeed

Exactly.

Thanks to KidsConnect Psychology ❤️

Baby-Led Adventures - 5 Reasons Babies Need To Lead - Janet Lansbury 29/11/2021

Babies are incredibly sensitive, something we need to remember a lot more.

Baby-Led Adventures - 5 Reasons Babies Need To Lead - Janet Lansbury Babies are born adventurers. If we give them our full attention and a completely safe, reasonably interesting place in which they are free to move, they’re on their way. Even the youngest infant can lead us on play adventures if we watch closely and use our imagination, because long before a baby ...

Our Children Crave Boundaries - Permissiveness is Unkind - Janet Lansbury 26/11/2021

Children need boundaries to feel safe.

Our Children Crave Boundaries - Permissiveness is Unkind - Janet Lansbury There are parents like me who would rather avoid setting boundaries. We fear that conflict or disagreements with our kids will amount to a net loss for us. You’ll stop liking me. You’ll leave. You’ll be too sad, angry, broken spirited. We’ll feel ashamed, doubtful, blame ourselves. It can fe...

7 Myths That Discourage Independent Play - Janet Lansbury 15/11/2021

Good advice here...

7 Myths That Discourage Independent Play - Janet Lansbury The value of child-directed play is universally recognized and one of the few aspects of child-rearing that experts and thought leaders agree on. Independent play makes for highly productive, happily occupied kids, which in turn makes for happier, calmer parents. And it’s natural — the desire an...

4 Reasons To Ditch Academic Preschools - Janet Lansbury 13/11/2021

4 Reasons To Ditch Academic Preschools - Janet Lansbury I’m still scratching my head that I actually witnessed this… Years ago, I was investigating preschools for my first child and made a scheduled visit to one of the most popular schools in the neighborhood, chosen by parents I consider to be intelligent and thoughtful. As I entered the classroom a...

28/10/2021

It is so important to understand what courage truly is.

Brave in the ways that matter. 💪🏼♥️

11/10/2021

Here is the good advice from John Marsdon again for those who missed it. https://www.facebook.com/213629235352802/posts/2382868015095569/

“JOHN MARSDEN’S TIPS FOR PARENTS
1. Give children space. Back off. Let them roam. Let them be bored. Don't over-plan their lives. Cut way back on the after-school activities programs.

2. Keep away from all those ghastly, soulless, sterile playgrounds. Keep away from shopping malls. Look for real places. Wild places.

3. Be an adult. Say no to your children at least once a day. If the role of Adult in your family is vacant, then one of your children will fill it. And it won't be pretty.

4. Don't take up all the space. If you are dominating, loud, forceful, your children are highly likely to become passive, lacking spirit and personality … and/or sullen.

5. Believe about 40 per cent of the dramatic stories your children tell you of the injustices, corruption and satanic practices happening at school.

6. Teach them empathy. For example, after their jubilant victory celebrations when they win a sporting match, remind them that their jubilation was only possible because someone else – the losers – have been made to feel awful.

7. Help them develop language skills. Don't finish their sentences for them. Don't correct them when they mispronounce a word – they'll work it out sooner or later. Ask them open-ended questions, that need a detailed answer, not Yes/No questions.

8. Make sure they have regular jobs/duties at home and that those jobs are done to a consistently high standard.

9. Don't whinge endlessly about the miseries of your adult life. A lot of children now are fearful about growing up because their parents paint such a grim picture of the awfulness ahead.

10. Teach them to be very wary of people who Absolutely Know the Absolute Truth about Absolutely Everything! The colour of truth is always grey. Extreme positions are for the ignorant. Every creature, every person and every situation is complex. The universe is a wonderful mystery.”

26/08/2021
07/08/2021

A new book to consider..

BITS FROM THE BOOK...
Modern psychology didn’t start with rats in mazes, or people on couches talking about their mothers, but with a man called Carl Rogers. Rogers had a superb mind but also a warm heart, and he refused to believe that those two things should be separated. He took things out of the chilly hands of the men in white coats and founded what we now call Humanistic Psychology. Rogers and a handful of colleagues basically invented the modern idea of counselling.
Rogers knew something fundamental to human wellbeing – that to come through the worst times in life, we all need someone who really listens deeply to us, and does not interrupt with their own agenda. If you have ever been well cared for by a counsellor or had a doctor who gave you time and their full attention, you may have Rogers to thank.
But working alongside Carl Rogers was a man who took things further still, and whose work is just beginning to be fully acknowledged. Eugene Gendlin was, in my view and that of many who knew him, a genius. He is really the grandfather of this book in your hands right now.
Gendlin and Rogers found that some people, right from the get-go, responded very well to counselling, and some just did not. So they studied videotapes minutely to find out what the difference was. Those who grew, healed and flew ahead did something very distinct. When the counsellor asked something, they did not glibly rattle off some words, they did something different – they paused, then went inside themselves to find the answer . . .
Are you angry with your husband? Pause, reflects. No, well, I am, but there is more this feeling of despair, like, can he even change? I feel a bit hopeless, and sad for him too . . .*
In every instance where a client in counselling was on the edge of growth or new insight, there was a point where they had to search inside themselves for what was true. And that THERE WAS A DEFINITE, FELT SENSE IN THEIR BODY CALLING TO BE UNDERSTOOD. The answer at first seemed fuzzy, but with some more focus, it would suddenly clarify. The client struggled for words, perhaps made a few false guesses, rejected those, and then, ‘bang’ – there it was. They found the word or understanding that was true, and their body shifted with relief.
The client in counselling needs to feel safe, and if they feel safe, they can be honest, but they can only be honest if they know their own hearts. And some people go through lives never doing this.
If you don’t practice going inside yourself, pretty soon you forget you even have an inside. And that is a problem.
Gendlin knew this ability to check inside was vital to wellbeing, and he set out to help people gain that skill. What Gendlin came to believe was that we have a ‘second brain’, a second locus of awareness, which of course is what I call supersense. For every dilemma we face in life, there is a body awareness that has captured this, and that can guide you.
Gendlin believes (and he is a highly respected academic philosopher) that there is no difference between body and mind. That every inch of our body is mind. Nerves, hormones, muscles all talk to each other, they are a unity. Our physical body is not as we have been taught to think, a biological machine, but is a consciousness that arose out of nature, shaped by all our interactions in life. It isn’t a metaphor. Your body IS your mind. Our ‘felt sense’, our supersense, is the way we experience that, and our little orange-rind cortex that thinks in words is a vital, but only partial, accessory to that.
That’s enough for now, but I wanted you to glimpse the scope of it all. And to give credit where it is due. Thank you, Carl and Eugene. You changed the world. (EDITED EXTRACT FROM FULLY HUMAN, A NEW WAY OF USING YOUR MIND, PUBLISHED BY PAN MACMILLAN, 2021).

30/07/2021

For your girls sakes...

27/07/2021

This is such good advice from John Marsden I may have to post it twice! https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=2382868015095569&id=213629235352802

“JOHN MARSDEN’S TIPS FOR PARENTS
1. Give children space. Back off. Let them roam. Let them be bored. Don't over-plan their lives. Cut way back on the after-school activities programs.

2. Keep away from all those ghastly, soulless, sterile playgrounds. Keep away from shopping malls. Look for real places. Wild places.

3. Be an adult. Say no to your children at least once a day. If the role of Adult in your family is vacant, then one of your children will fill it. And it won't be pretty.

4. Don't take up all the space. If you are dominating, loud, forceful, your children are highly likely to become passive, lacking spirit and personality … and/or sullen.

5. Believe about 40 per cent of the dramatic stories your children tell you of the injustices, corruption and satanic practices happening at school.

6. Teach them empathy. For example, after their jubilant victory celebrations when they win a sporting match, remind them that their jubilation was only possible because someone else – the losers – have been made to feel awful.

7. Help them develop language skills. Don't finish their sentences for them. Don't correct them when they mispronounce a word – they'll work it out sooner or later. Ask them open-ended questions, that need a detailed answer, not Yes/No questions.

8. Make sure they have regular jobs/duties at home and that those jobs are done to a consistently high standard.

9. Don't whinge endlessly about the miseries of your adult life. A lot of children now are fearful about growing up because their parents paint such a grim picture of the awfulness ahead.

10. Teach them to be very wary of people who Absolutely Know the Absolute Truth about Absolutely Everything! The colour of truth is always grey. Extreme positions are for the ignorant. Every creature, every person and every situation is complex. The universe is a wonderful mystery.”

Don't Stand Me Up - Janet Lansbury 27/05/2021

Self initiated movement empowers children and lets them do it when they are physiologically ready for it. Hurrying does not help.

Don't Stand Me Up - Janet Lansbury An infant sits stiffly on the floor, unable to move his legs or extend his arms without losing his balance… A toddler steps off a platform and takes a tumble… Another toddler climbs the bars to the top of a wooden structure, then panics and cries out for his mom, who rushes over to rescue … Co...

Popularity at school linked to age position in class – study 06/05/2021

This new research confirms old research about the oldest children in a class often doing better. Parents often don't have much choice in this but it is worth knowing so that these youngest children in the class are given appropriate extra support.

Popularity at school linked to age position in class – study Research in England, Sweden and the Netherlands shows how age gaps can shape lives

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